Britney Spears’ dad won’t even let her see booze

June 8th, 2009 // 40 Comments

Seen here in London over the weekend, Britney Spears’ dad Jamie runs things backstage with an iron fist and has prohibited anyone from drinking within eyesight of Britney. The Sun reports:

Britney’s family have issued the blanket ban on any areas that the star might pass through on her way from dressing room to stage – and staff have been asked to sign contracts promising that no booze will be available.
A source at the venue says: “Following her problems with alcohol, Britney had requested that everywhere backstage is alcohol free. Her family is monitoring the situation very carefully and we’ve been made to sign contracts promising not to drink or allow any of the VIP guests to have alcohol in any of the backstage areas that Britney could use. It is very important to Britney that she doesn’t see anybody drinking in her presence.”

Before I begin, let me crack open a cold, refreshing beer that makes all my problems go away. *sips* Ahh! Delicious. Now where was I? Right, Britney’s drinking. Her dad is definitely making the right move. After seeing her breasts flopping around in 2007, it’s best for everyone if Britney is kept away from the sauce. I mean, all drinking really does is give you an incredible feeling of self-worth and guarantees no one will take your kids. Plus it tastes like chicken.

NOTE: You should’ve paid the ransom, England. Muahaha!

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Comments (40)

  1. Jessicado | June 8, 2009 at 3:54 pm

    Ahhhhh beer

    Reply
  2. Max Planck | June 8, 2009 at 3:54 pm

    So what’s with the dumb hats?

    Reply
  3. NY Ted | June 8, 2009 at 3:56 pm

    I’ll be the first to drink to that…!

    Cheers…!

    Reply
  4. Jessicado | June 8, 2009 at 3:58 pm

    Sweet! Actually I just typed the first thing that came to mind to stop one of those freakin tards from saying “First!”
    But I think in the end a toast to beer was a win, win for all!

    Reply
  5. RtSS | June 8, 2009 at 3:59 pm

    To quote George Thorogood: “1 Bourbon, 1 Scotch, and 1 Beer…”

    Reply
  6. IRON TWAT | June 8, 2009 at 4:01 pm

    She’s still got booze-bloat.

    Reply
  7. Angus | June 8, 2009 at 4:04 pm

    What happens when she gets drunk? You guessed it: butt sex.

    And we have our Monday trifecta.

    Reply
  8. Rasputins Liver | June 8, 2009 at 4:08 pm

    HOLEEEE….

    ……………………SHIT!

    GodDAMN!… that bitch is mind warpingly FUGLY!!!

    If I were her dad I’d fuckin’ ban, prohibit, anyone from lookin’ at that butt-fuckin’ grotesquery called “my daughter” as the risk of being sued for millions because someone’s eyeballs were burnt to to crisp for the sight of her fugliness is too damned high.

    Honestly! Twatney’s one STD away from making Skid Row hookers seem like Mother Teresas!

    Ah fuck, man! I think I gotta go to the free clinic just from seeing her PICTURE on my monitor!

    Goddamit!

    .

    Reply
  9. The Music Elitist | June 8, 2009 at 4:17 pm

    Oh good. Because this dumb redneck bitch can’t control her alcohol intake the rest of the crew on the tour suffers. Way to go Brit!

    Reply
  10. p0nk | June 8, 2009 at 4:18 pm

    and unfortunately, the only sober people willing to have sex with her are terrorists or immediate family.

    Reply
  11. Rasputins Liver | June 8, 2009 at 4:27 pm

    Really, man….

    ….Jamie would have been better off letting Lutfi and that photog dude continue to debase her as that’s just what the butt uglyt, no talent, sleazy ho-bag wanted.

    That bitch liked being treated like the country-ghetto neanderbilly piece of garbage she actually is.

    Besides, Jamie wouold also have done the world a real favor as we were all havin’ a great timne wacthin’ his daughter melt down in spectacular fashion.

    I know, I know. I undertsand the practicle side of things in that after all the bullshit he had to putr up with from his ex-wiff, Twatney and her dumbass slut of a younger sister, he deserved to cash it in a bit.

    But dammit! Couldn’t he have done it whilst still allowing us the Twatney Sperms Country-Ghetto Meltdown Freakshow?!?

    Oh well, where’s dat buket o’ chikin likins, y’all?

    Reply
  12. Freebie | June 8, 2009 at 4:32 pm

    Wow – she is not going to age well. In ten years she’s really going to look older than she really is.

    Reply
  13. kevin sumler | June 8, 2009 at 4:39 pm

    hold your head up baby there just a bunch of hating ass fu**ked in the ass suck ass no pus**y getting faggets. your beautiful and so sexy .. holla ????

    Reply
  14. kevin sumler | June 8, 2009 at 4:39 pm

    hold your head up baby there just a bunch of hating ass fu**ked in the ass suck ass no pus**y getting faggets. your beautiful and so sexy .. holla ????

    Reply
  15. kevin sumler | June 8, 2009 at 4:39 pm

    hold your head up baby there just a bunch of hating ass fu**ked in the ass suck ass no pus**y getting faggets. your beautiful and so sexy .. holla ????

    Reply
  16. Rasputins Liver | June 8, 2009 at 4:46 pm

    .

    _________________________________________________________

    12. Freebie – June 8, 2009 4:32 PM

    Wow – she is not going to age well. In ten years she’s really going to look older than she really is.

    _________________________________________________________

    Well,, ya know, Freebie….

    Slutney’s got her daddy’s double chin genes.

    What ever good looks she had were lost about five years ago or so after she dropped her first kid.

    Then add to that her hard partyin’ whoring and she’s wound up lookin’ like something you’d stiff arm away from ya.

    She not only look like she was rode hard and put away wet, but was then taken right back out and rode hard again repeatedly.

    And don’t forget, she also has the serious Stink Foot thing goin’ on. So between her Stink Snatch and her Stink Foot, well, there’s a whole lotta stinkin’ goin’ on!

    Hahahahaahahaahahaaaaaa!!!

    .

    Reply
  17. britneys chin | June 8, 2009 at 4:48 pm

    The double chin has got to go. Otherwise she looks okay, considering she’s been wasted for the past few years.

    Reply
  18. britneys chin | June 8, 2009 at 4:48 pm

    The double chin has got to go. Otherwise she looks okay, considering she’s been wasted for the past few years.

    Reply
  19. RtSS | June 8, 2009 at 5:17 pm

    I’d Butt-Fuck her… In fact that’s the best way to do Britney any more. Face down, ass up, and pulling on those hair extensions. There was a time when I would’ve let her sit on my face, but that was many years ago. She’s doable from behind in either the pink love tunnel or the dirt tunnel. Either way, she would scream and enjoy it.

    Reply
  20. dirk | June 8, 2009 at 5:20 pm

    Um, explain to me again why this zygote-headed, mentally disturbed, talentless wonder is famous, again. Sorry, I must have landed on FUCKING MARS.

    Reply
  21. Funeral Guy | June 8, 2009 at 5:29 pm

    Shit, if she’s doing the white knuckle sobriety that bad, she should be crawling through a gutter on skid row in no time.

    Reply
  22. Kat | June 8, 2009 at 5:32 pm

    #21

    Please see – Obama Voters. Same people buy her music.

    Reply
  23. whats eating ROUGH daddy | June 8, 2009 at 5:34 pm

    Maybe it is a good idea for jaime to cut the booze! In the last 2 pics she looks like the fat Elvis with blonde streaks…

    Reply
  24. Anonymous | June 8, 2009 at 5:59 pm

    Her looks are completely gone. Teenage mall chicks are much better.

    Reply
  25. Anon | June 8, 2009 at 6:02 pm

    Then they’d better keep her at the stage at all times because she’s in England and all she’s going to see is people drinking.

    I’m sloshed right now and got an alcohol test to take at work.
    If I’m not wankered enough I’ll fail it.

    Reply
  26. mikeock | June 8, 2009 at 6:24 pm

    Slap a blue vest on her, and she’s your typical hot WalMart girl, only not as bright and twice as easy.

    Reply
  27. Anonymous | June 8, 2009 at 6:59 pm

    ‘To quote George Thorogood: “1 Bourbon, 1 Scotch, and 1 Beer…”"

    Actually…..John Lee Hooker said it first…….

    Reply
  28. super pretty chick | June 8, 2009 at 8:23 pm

    24 – I disagree, she has the face structure of an angel. she is cute as hell.

    Reply
  29. RtSS | June 8, 2009 at 11:56 pm

    @27: You are absolutely right… Thanks for the correction. At least my @19 stands true. And after further thought, I would even let her suck my schlong, even with her double chin going on. There’s something about those Britney eyes, that would be nice to gaze into while she gurgles away.

    Reply
  30. gerard vandenberg | June 8, 2009 at 11:57 pm

    IRON FIST?
    hahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha
    hohohohohohohohohohohohohohohohohohohohohohohohohohohohohoho
    hahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha!!!

    Reply
  31. Rss Feeds | June 9, 2009 at 2:00 am

    Great Blog!!
    the Rss feed Added to worss.com

    Reply
  32. Rock Star | June 9, 2009 at 3:31 am

    Damn she’s ugly!

    Reply
  33. RtSS | June 9, 2009 at 8:27 am

    Poor Britney, she’s looking like a worn out sack of potatoes. She’s lumpy and saggy in all the wrong places. Her tits are hanging down low. OMG she is looking like she’s early to mid forties in thes shots. The first image almost looks like she’s growing a thin layer of moustashe on her upper lip. That coupled with her double chin, the base way to lay the lumber to her is with her in the respectable position of face down in the pillow, and ass up in the air. Urrruup, her stretched out pussy might be a bit to take so don’t look into it before you insert your self. those scratch pads on the vajay-jay walls are scabs and will soften when her pussy juice starts to flow, Get me som lotion those a hard and crusty. Rot Crotch.

    Reply
  34. RtSS | June 9, 2009 at 8:43 am

    PussUUwwjsjjjnny fuck techniqes wih briney would need both your hand and you,You’I Spread that pussy wide stick both my feet into her pussy, I head shes wyinto butt-fucking. wWoo Then I would flip her over and put my feet into her aass. That gapping whole would take my tow feet, plus a hand.

    Reply
  35. Darth | June 9, 2009 at 10:03 am

    How about BS doing a duet with Amy Whinehouse? It’s good for both of their careers.

    Reply
  36. Rasputins Liver | June 9, 2009 at 10:44 am

    Hmm…

    ……………………………………………………………………………………………………………………….
    28. super pretty chick – June 8, 2009 8:23 PM

    24 – I disagree, she has the face structure of an angel. she is cute as hell.
    ………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………..

    No way, spc!

    That country-ghetto, no talent, vacuous, neanderbilly broad’s totally hagged!

    She’s not even face down, ass up worthy!

    She’s a HASMAT situation in Stink Foot boots.

    She’s fugly … fugly! … FUGLY!!

    Oh … and did I say Twatney was….

    … FUGLY?

    She is, ya know.

    I wouldn’t let even George Dubya stick his Li’l Dick Cheney into that trailer trash cooze! And that’s saying a lot!]

    Twatney!

    Yeesh!

    .

    Reply
  37. jenny | June 9, 2009 at 11:01 am

    I think she looks just fine. I also like her hat! It is cute.

    Reply
  38. Tom K | June 9, 2009 at 12:26 pm

    I like this new writer! LMAO

    “After seeing her breasts flopping around in 2007, it’s best for everyone if Britney is kept away from the sauce.”

    Hilarious!!!!

    Reply
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  40. hard drive media player | May 22, 2010 at 2:52 am

    This, combined with his double chin, the bottom gives way to wood, was with his respectable position pillows, and ass in the air. Urrruup her pussy stretched out perhaps a bit &;so you do not have to consider before replacing the same.

    Reply

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