Britney Spears banned from Super Bowl promo

January 16th, 2007 // 85 Comments
britney-spears-west-hollywood-00.jpg

The Super Bowl is trying to get together celebrities for an all-star NFL Network promo to air during the game, but a source says Britney Spears’ people “were turned down flat out when they asked about participating.”

“She’s too much of a train wreck,” says the insider. “Besides, we already have Paris Hilton. Janet Reno and David Beckham are also on the wish list,” says the source. “Larry David said he might do it. Also, we’re trying to get Predator, from the movie.”

Are they actually proud that they’ve got Paris Hilton in their promo? It’s like bragging that you’ve got Tara Reid on your chess team. And what the hell kind of promo is this? Paris Hilton, Janet Reno, and the damn Predator? Apparently they’ve confused football with The Super Hilarious Almost-Celebrity Fun Hour.

superficial

  1. BigJim

    Maybe the Predator will eviscerate Paris.

  2. icyprincess2

    Holy goodness, She needs to get her act together before she should be out acting

  3. youdontwannaknow

    She should just be banned for being fugly, period.

  4. jesseeca

    there she goes, gettin ready to pull up her short skirt again, well more like a house coat, the kind my great-grandmother used to wear.

  5. BarbadoSlim

    Her dress is available at COSTCOs everywhere folks!!

  6. icyprincess2

    is that the same nappy hair from the park picture?

  7. Good God… icy, that looks like ur couch… but a less stylish version… and I dont know HOW that happened…

  8. The NFL is way too classy for Britney. They cater to a very high-brow audience you know. Beer-swilling meatheads are incredibly discerning. The last thing they want to see is some drunken tart.

    brad and angie moving to New Orleans at crabbie’s

  9. icyprincess2

    Jessica that is cause my whore ass boyfriend gave her the matching chairs…lol

  10. and yes, same nappy hair… at least she’s not pullin a vin diesel this time with the whole live baby in the mouth bit

  11. icyprincess2

    Although she could be hiding the baby half up her cooch, and covering the bulge with that shower curtain she is wearing

  12. ok icy, Im goin to bed-eth… time to get my beauty sleep… too bad it has no affect on my ugly.. haha

    and thx for the text to let me know that the superfish is tryin to make a comeback by posting things relatively quick…

  13. icyprincess2

    Hey no prob girl, ttyl

  14. lol, its not that…. her “people” got decapitated by her massive vag when they told her she was denied for the NFL…

    I dont know why though, she’d make a great linebacker…

    ok goodnight

  15. Dureagonfly

    She needs to go back to the trailer park she came from and clean up her act.

  16. JessicaCha

    not an act…lol, its for real… she’s classy back home in louisiana, i hear

  17. Toychainsaw

    I’m expecting the vontrap family to be sending a law suit on curtin made clothing …

    You know .. coz these are a few of thier favorite things .. and Britney isnt.

    yeah …

  18. jrzmommy

    Yes, you know you suck when people think Janet Reno will sell more than you.

  19. Wow,

    Having the NFL turn her down for PAris Hilton because Paris is LESS of a train wreck than Spears is the same as somebody saying;

    “I’m sorry, we’ve already hired this bucket of shit and vomit because it smells better than you do”

    Brittany, you’d better start trying to get a job recording celebrity voice-mail messages for people because it’s looking pretty well over.

  20. It’s because she banned herself from underwear and showering.

  21. RussianMafia

    Her eyebrows have been taking over her face lately. Kudos on the teeth though, they never lost their luster, must be that whitening gum she is always chomping.

  22. Whammer Jammer

    That is too damn funny. Maybe now Twitney will finally get the hint that nobody wants her around anymore. I love it. Her career is circling the drain.

  23. Britney’s career = over. Remember, I predicted it first :-)

  24. Let Britney be in it.

    Maybe we can get a Janet Jackson re-enactment.

  25. ph7

    I’ve never seen someone turn so ugly so fast.

    And you just know the offspring of K-Fed and Britney are stone cold stupid.

    Hopefully, her next career move will be to test gallows drop weights for the new Iraqi government.

  26. haveapez

    I will never forgive the NFL for that Aerosmith/Spears halftime show a few years ago.

  27. karifarrell

    WTF!!! Britney Spears is too much of a “trainwreck” but Paris Hilton is A-OK???
    What the hell is going on around here?!? If I had to choose between the two (and God help me if I ever do) I would choose Britney any day of the week…unless I’m choosing who I’d rather see get hit in the face with a shovel or a Mac Truck, because then it would be Paris. Ooooh, I just got a tingle thinking about that….

  28. Troller

    Another day – another picture of her holding her dress, threatening us with a cooter flash if we don’t behave.

  29. space_monkey

    Its a bad sign for your career when the Predator is higher up the celebrity totem pole than you are.

  30. caljenna

    Good GAWD, why is this chick ALWAYS hiking up her over-the-knee skirts and dresses? Are we a little ballerina? Is she about to curtsey? Is there a strong gust of wind that follows her around? I mean, wtf????

  31. Amanda

    I have to admit… I’m not really understanding the “Britney is a train wreck but Paris isn’t” thing.

  32. bigponie

    I thought Janet Reno and the Predator are one in the same.

  33. Boogie Monster

    #29 – I was going to say the exact same thing!

    And WTF is she wearing? Its very obvious she has no stylist at the moment. She’s starting to look more and more like trailer trash.

  34. magickal

    I’m so sick of this bitch already. NEXT~!

  35. superstar

    Obviously they know they’re going to have problems with Paris Hilton. Remember what Tina Fey said about her and what she said Paris was doing to ruin it all?
    So if Paris and Britney got together, they’d probably be begging the people to let them have a pole dance using eachother as a pole.
    Anyway, Britney doesn’t want to hang out with Paris anymore anyway!

  36. carrie bradshaw

    All I know is that if I was one of Britney’s “people” I would have to be shot with a horse tranquilizer beforehand in order to keep a straight face and not die of hysterical laughter while telling her the NFL wants Janet Reno and the Predator over her.

  37. 86

    WHO are those trannies on the sidebars??????

  38. 86

    My grandmother has that exact pattern on her couch. Her couch is like a hundred years old. I bet it just decreased in value. Thanks Brit, you bitch.

  39. BarbadoSlim

    I was having brunch with several Predator friends of mine, and they told me, in no uncertain terms: NO. SELF. RESPECTING. Predator. would ever be seen with her.

  40. mrs.t

    Where the fuck is her stylist? And I don’t want the easy answer, i.e.”Brit ate her”. What the fuck is that rug she’s been sporting for the past month? It’s weird, but that fucking hair really and truly pisses me of fevery time I see it. I’m normally content to just make a nasty comment and split, but I am just absolutely confounded by her appearance.

  41. crystalljackson

    She needs to get some better extensions. These make her head look like Mr. Peanut. On a side note, her legs are doing the whole swollow-up her-knee-cap-thing like they usually are.

  42. mrs.t

    she even looks like she developed some type of chromosome problem over the past few years. Was it there all along, artfully diguised by makeup trickery?

  43. anothershityear

    #42 :

    yes.

  44. Its a real slap in the face when the NFL says “No Britney, you are too dysfunctional to be included in this motly assortment of people/fictional characters.”

    Then again maybe the NFL was afraid she would try to wear the outfit from the last time she was there. As I remember, it looked completely retarded on a less weathered, 30 pounds lighter Britney. Eek.

  45. cole007

    they were afraid another janet jackson incident would occur, but this time, everyone already knows the goods and will instantly vomit, causing a mass-chaos situation.

  46. caljenna

    @ 37 LOL…trannies…nope, not trannies, just gold-digging and/or over-privileged O.C. broads with an annoying TV show!

  47. John Madden

    Who cares about the Super Bowl? Guys play football to roll around on top of each other, pat each other’s ass, and then take a big group shower. Buncha latent homos (I should know, I’m the biggest one of all, except not latent). The only ones worse are the ‘male’ fans, who start to dribble as soon as they see their favorite player (“I had him on my fantasy team!”). Hopefully security will fail and a truck bomb will hit the Super Bowl, then the espn guys can finally cry and hug on-air like they always dreamed (with clips of their woodies showing on youtube).

  48. XeoRad

    Britney = projectile vomiting. I heard she read a book about Kurt Cobain, so she is emulating his style (or lack thereof). Now if she would only follow through…..

    Predator would be cool if it would just kill a couple of the B-list celebs on live TV.

  49. Whammer Jammer

    Hey John Madden,

    You’re a moron. You must have been the one that always got picked last in neighborhood pickup games, and you’re jealous that you can’t play sports. You can always watch figure skating if you can’t handle a man’s sport.

  50. BarbadoSlim

    @47…nice little anti-american rant there Lenin.

    Communism is dead, GET OVER IT pinko.

Leave A Comment