Britney Spears and Kevin Federline learn to share

January 5th, 2007 // 57 Comments
britney-spears-custody.jpg

Britney Spears and Kevin Federline have reportedly worked out a mutual custody arrangement for January where Britney will have the majority of custody while Kevin will only be allowed with his children from noon to 4:00 on Monday, Wednesday, and Friday at Britney’s home. Although the judge could’ve easily replaced these with 4-hour head-punching sessions and the kids still would’ve been better off. Deciding between Britney and Kevin on who to give the children to is like deciding if they’d be better off living in the microwave or the inside of a bear’s mouth.

superficial

  1. bush twins

    just watch, after 1 week of “custody” visits britney will be pregnant again.

  2. sillyleen

    God I can’t believe I’m starting to feel bad for k-fed…

  3. Jenster

    I 2nd the first post.

    She looks like Kevin Federline in that picture. When was the last time she washed her hair, seriously?

  4. crazyfool

    does k-fed ever visit his practice babies or just his famous babies?

  5. misanthrope

    Phew, well, what a relief. I thought the boys would have to go to a safe and loving home.

  6. wedgeone

    yah- this picture looks more like the REAL Brit & not that dressed up whore from the previous posting. Plaid flannel shirt, dirty hair, no makeup.
    Truly coming from some bayou trailer park on her way to 7-Eleven for a bag of Frito Lays.

  7. PatinNJ

    Yuck.

  8. misanthrope

    The other pictures are of Brit in drag. This is her ‘Shucks I’m a dumbass’ persona.

  9. amaritimer

    if he wants the majority of the time with the kids, just ask for them when she goes out to party… she’s out a lot… makes sense to me

  10. oshkoshb-goshdammgosh

    She looks like she wants a Labatts Blue. And some flapjacks. And perhaps a shiny new axe and some lumber.

  11. amaritimer

    but then again, those two breeding didn’t make sense to me but they still did. Stupid fuckers.

  12. amaritimer

    mmmmmmm…. Labatts Blue….. mmmmmmm….. beeeeeeer…..

  13. cruzin333

    12 hours a week? So much for K-Fed saying he has all this dirt on Britney and that he’s gonna get custody of the kids.

    Who’s next in line to have his baby? My bets are on Paris.

  14. misanthrope

    There was already enough dirt on Britney.

  15. Kristin

    Lmao @ #1. =]

  16. coma12

    It is sad when the nanny and her bodyguard have more custody of the kids then the both of them. They both need to be making alimony checks to the nanny and her bodyguard.

    Also for the benefit of all human-kind, neuter them.

  17. coma12

    Hey is that the half face of KFed or just some random person Brit is going to marry for 12 minutes?

  18. This arrangement is called “babysitting.” K-Fed will be “babysitting” while Britney Spears is out “nursing habits” and “having sex with random guys.”

    I assume the timing means she will be working on another album in the evenings. Good for her… I’m sure that won’t smell like her kid’s/K-Fed’s diapers.

  19. Jeremy1Esq

    Make a deal with KFed to only see his kids for 12 hrs a week..10 million

    Turn over your kids to a nanny for the rest of the time they are awake so you can party with your pussy..priceless.

  20. Binky

    I think it’ll work.
    She ought to be awake by 4.

  21. BuckTheInfernal

    He can only see the kids between noon and 4 on a weekday?

    Must be nice not to have a *job*, you know, something someone his age should have. Then again, if I didn’t have a job I’d be a shiftless and talentless loser like him too. Without the paparazzi.

  22. yashi

    the mom should get custody… i bet she is the one who is taking care of the babies while britney is getting drunk!

  23. RichPort

    that picture of i love new york on the ad bar makes me want to blow chunks

    i think federline is hot

  24. spunkbubble on J.alba's face

    Everytime I look at a picture of her I think what in god’s name was america thinking for sweating this trailer park pig?

  25. Scott

    Here’s a fun flash game between Britney and K-Fed:

    http://www.tacosntonic.com/flash/PlayBritneySpears.php

  26. Pointandlaugh

    I got 686, level 7 on that game (2nd try). was mildly fun.

  27. BarbadoSlim

    Spokespeople for both parties(well, mainly Brits, Earl’s guy was just some dude he had beers with the night before, his name is T-Bone)
    Anyway, they are happy to report that an arrangement has been reached that will guarantee that the kids will be psychologically fucked up as soon as possible.

  28. Binky

    #25
    Reached level 1, with some coaching, and then decided I didn’t need any ‘loser’ confirmation at the present time.
    (Christmas cards were down this year)

  29. Tracy

    Britney needs a new life coach. Paris didn’t do such a good job.

  30. RichPort

    #6 Comic genius, LMFAO, ROTFLOL, HAHAHAHAAAAHAAAAAA!

    #27 *yawn*

  31. mikewall

    Britney fans just wont give up.
    Britney maintained the support of her fans and was voted the sexiest woman on topsexywomen.com
    http://www.topsexywomen.com/sexiest-woman-in-the-world.html

    I doubt she will have any fans left next year

  32. Cherokee Chocolate

    Where are the men? I’m sick of looking at girls! Come on, Superfish give the ladies something to look at. One Leo post isn’t good enough.

  33. GetReaL

    So let me get this straight…her people say that it is ok that she parties because she spends the day with the kids. Now, under this agreement, she will see them three less days? Whatta mom!

  34. Mo

    #32, I beg to differ…one Leo post is more than enough. Total girly man.

  35. #34, I think you just said that you’re gay.

  36. wedgeone

    Labatts Blue … proof that God loves us and wants us to be happy.

    #23 – FTLTC! Your sarcasm in #30 would mean a lot more if you weren’t using someone else’s screen name. It wasn’t that funny. I know. I wrote it.

  37. BarbadoSlim

    Oh,we didn’t meet the trolls exacting standards of …..what? ass?

    oh my, oh my, how ever will we go on?

  38. Do Freebird

    Did the judge give any thought that either of them can actually tell time?

  39. Cherokee Chocolate

    #34 What I meant was one male celeb post vs. about 5-10 female celeb posts isn’t enough.

  40. HELLpenis

    That first comment was funny as hell…

    But this is still a pretty sad story. Ugh, it’s depressing when kids have to go through this. I guess the only saving grace is that they’re so young, and hopefully won’t remember any of this shit; and by the time they are old enough to have real memories, things will be somewhat sorted out.

  41. troll (generic brand)

    whoa whoa whoa…I thought we had an unspoken agreement that BarbadoSlim is above trolling? Single coolest person here. Plus, if you didn’t think “Earl’s guy was just some dude he had beers with the night before, his name is T-Bone” was funny, it’s time for a brain scan.

    (yeah yeah yeah, I’m just a gay troll with a crush, blah blah blah)

  42. Lowlands

    This is a sinking ship,i feel almost pity for her…She doesn’t wear these sunglasses for only looking cool…I won’t be surprised if she shows up the next time in a burka…

  43. Bell91501198

    I probably WOULDN’T hit it. Depends on my mood. I say 8 times out of 10 I’m not touching it. That’s all. Later.

  44. Mr. Fritz

    Yeah, this pic of her really makes my dick hard…

    http://www.ebaumsworld.com/images/britneynomakeup2.jpg

  45. oshkoshb-goshdammgosh

    That picture was a little bit photoshopped. Not a lot baby girl, just a little bit.

  46. Lowlands

    (44)Flashbacks of my eccentric aunt Amalia coming up…

  47. Lowlands

    (46)She was exorbitant wealthy and died happy…Why can’t you Britney?

  48. #36. KY Gel … proof that god doesn’t care that my ass accepts all comers.

  49. Carsten5577

    Britney has “Skanky White Trash” written on her forehead. She’s just a stupid, barely literate, low-class whore.

  50. RichPort

    Ass Troll, by troll standards, you’re starting to slip… any funny shit you had was exhausted after the first few tries, and even that was fucking lame. Why you go back to stalking us at Ferret’s and living vicariously through us? Oh wait, you already do that…

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