Britney Spears and Adnan: ‘Classiest Couple ’08’

Britney Spears and her paparazzi man-candy Adnan Ghalib have been embarking on daily shopping sprees over the past week. One stop was the Betsey Johnson store in Sherman Oaks where Britney apparently came out of a dressing room buck-ass naked, according to Life & Style:

“I was blown away. Britney’s private parts were right in front of me!” a store employee tells Life & Style.
“I grabbed a dress to cover her and she screamed, ‘Get away from me! Don’t you f—— come near me!’ says the employee.
“Then she disappeared in the dressing room with Adnan for 45 minutes. They were making weird noises. It was disgusting.”

When Britney and Adnan finally came out, what followed is probably the most accurate description of how I imagine Britney talking:

“I couldn’t understand a word she was saying. She was slurring and spitting, and talking with a British accent,” says the employee. “Her face was covered with cold sores and acne, and her scalp was patchy. I wanted to help her, but she was so mean that I left her alone.
“Then she muttered, ‘F— you!’ and left the store.”

Britney Spears vagina is a terrorist. I’ve said it before, I’ll say it again. I’ve even sent evidence to the Pentagon, but they won’t take me seriously or even fire a missile at her house. Just one missile is all I’m asking. I don’t get it. Is it my Star Wars stationary? Or the fact that I wrote “Britney’s cooch is the flappy hood of Bin Laden” with glitter paint? I wanted it to look official.

Photos: Bauer-Griffin