Fun Fact: Shortly after Britney Spears just walked right off set during her first episode of X Factor, Simon Cowell secretly suffered a nervous breakdown that forced him to disappear for three weeks. Now imagine being in those shoes and coming back to see each and every one of these faces you paid $15 million for. I’d Tony Scott it right there on the red carpet. People walking be would be like, “Wow, there wasn’t even a bridge here. What a strangely handsome magician.”
Photos: Fame/Flynet, Splash News, WENN
Good God, lady
Somebody seriously needs to make a gif out of these. Like, today. Get on that, smart people.
Jesus – taking BATSHIT CRAZY to entirely new levels.
Dance, monkey! Dance! Show personality, which is at the moment inhibited by the drugs you desperately need to take so you don’t shave your head again. Smile a lot, smile wide! Be derpy! That’s adorable! Show you want to be there eventhough you don’t have a choice!
I seriously feel bad for Britney. She’s not into this anymore yet here we are. More million dollar deals, more forced appearances all to benefit the army of people that feed off her brand, and that super fertile good for nothing exhusband who might as well have won the lottery just for coming inside of her.
And then everyone cries when they die of a drug related coma and call it a tragedy and a huge loss while executives salivate at the prospect of a new wave of sales of their music. At least MJ’s doctor lost his license but count how many people are still living off of him.
TL;DR – don’t mock Britney. She’s an exploited mentally ill woman.
Meh… she signed up for this shit. And she still gets paid way more than the (Britney-a-parallel-universe) batshit crazy single mom that collects trolleys at Walmart.
Addendum: she didn’t “sign up for this shit.” She was “guided” by her parents at a very early age (look up her “Star Search” appearance), and sold to Disney.
Well put, Annie – I’d ‘thumbs-up’ but it’s broken.
Bootology: you’re a moron. I’d ‘thumbs-down’ but it’s broken.
This poor mind-controlled money machine would be much better off working at Wal-Mart than having an army of evil parasites sucking her teats her entire life, which will likely be tragically shortened like so many before her.
You must be new here. This isn’t SaveBritney.com…
Your tears aren’t helping. If you want to do something constructive, ask your supervisor if you can get a few shifts for Britney down at the Shop N Save.
Why dont they paint some fucking eyebrows on this mofo?!!! Agh!
Why OH WHY didn’t you add some funny captions to these. They’re BEGGING TO HAVE CAPTIONS
I would still do her in the balloon knot.
yeah, the on all fours pics are working for me.
Hahahaaha and I’m still giggling from your post from earlier … keep it up and I’ll wet myself. oops …too late. Hahahahaha
Overuse of ellipses. Is it really that difficult for you to come up with your own name? Really?
Get over yourself already lol
What the hell is going on here??
It is quite easy to sound like kimmykimkim. With the sexual innuendo and a bit of dirty talk, she nailed it.
Trolling people on the internet is so fuckin’ punk.
This is very entertaining for me. You see, AbsolutePunk is one of the Buzzmedia Publishers listed at the bottom of this page. :) It was either that or GoFugYourself. But thanks for taking my name sooo seriously. :))
Has there been any empirical evidence to prove that spear’s ISN’T in fact mentally retarded?
It’s either that or she’s a cartoon.
Manic…
Jason: “Oh Brit, no, don’t make THAT face, oh honey no, stop it!”
Lazy post. My 6 year old can successfully lampoon poor Britney. It’s just too easy. Hey, everybody, water is wet, the sky is blue, and Britney is batshit! Woohoo. Go back to the Kardashian Klan — they’re evil. Britney is just sad.
I was this happy too when I could write my name in concrete. Granted, I was 6 years old.
I bet even Ed Hardy thinks that dress is too douche-y.
They even auto-tune their faces to match expressions
Again with the facial auto-tune. Same expression!
Britney got auto-derped!
“hmmm, this stuff smells lak carmel, looks lak carmel, feels lak carmel, the second they stop lookin’ at me, amma fand out if it taysts lak carmel.”
Friggin retarded!
“First ah luk right…”
This reminds me of those Christian Bale promo shoots for American Psycho, where he is covered in blood making that same effortless face…
Knew I’d seen it somewhere
Uncanny.
[img]http://www.thesuperficial.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/09/12/patrons-sociopathes-american-psycho_large-248_319.jpg[/img]
I don’t think that “reminds” you. Crash. That IS the face.
Good freaking god.
“Don’t dip snuff.”
“…then ah luk left. Dagnabit, they all still lookin’ at me, I aint gonna fand out if this is carmel seement ah got may hands on. I wonder if they’d take back that 15 million they paid me for a truck full of carmel seement…”
“You think your the craziest hillbilly in Tinseltown? Face my bipolar rage, Miley Cyrus!”
Yup, looks like mania to me…
Hope she’s getting treatment.
she fat
I have my own troll.
So for the “Dumb and Dumber” sexual the Lloyd and Harry got sex-changes and convinced Americans that they are qualified to judge people? Well played Hollywood, well played.
At the end of this season it will be revealed that after the panic attack, Simon Cowell was replaced by Sacha Baron Cohen who in taking the Borat formula to a whole new level, was punking Americans on a massive scale.
Sharted
she makes wonky crossed eyes look so natural and effortless
just a stunning and natural beauty … takes my breath away
If b + d = x. Then can we safely say that wiht the addition of Brit and Demi the X-Factor they are looking for this season is CRAZY?
ermged! I just shert merself.
It has to be depressing to be judged and have your entire future and career possibly in the hands of someone who can’t actually sing and is nothing more than a product of Auto Tune.
How did her hair grow out so fast? Magic?
extensions
It’s the X-Factor Premiere “Tard-Off” competition! Text those votes!
“Dang! I cain’t never ‘member how to do a R!”
“Why, no. I have no idea where Simon Cowell is. I most certainly did not eat him if that’s what you’re imply- *burp* Oh, god! I can feel him squirming down there . . . I mean, Simon who?”
Meth is a hell of a drug.
(Damn it…there he is again! Why is it every time I go to one of these events there’s a ten foot tall Bilbo Baggins in the crowd THAT NO ONE ELSE CAN SEE??)
Britney Spears on all fours with her hands in what she thinks is chocolate cake. If the cameras weren’t on her, she’d be O-facing right now.
HER: “Aw, shucks, Jason! I think I just pooped a li’l more!”
HIM: “Mmm hmm, dear.”
“I’ve made a huge mistake.” –Jason Trawick
“Yeah, uh, what station is this show on again? What do you mean ‘look behind you?’ That’s not a TV station, stupid!”
“No terlet paper in the john, y’all!”
A million years in the future, in a local museum, terrans will see the fossilized imprints of BritSpearatosaurus, who once scavenged the lands eons ago.
She has to hold her breath for as long as she’s in this position or the dress rips.
She may have piles of cash but being stupid, drugged out and manipulated by all the men around her seems like a lousy way to go through life.
As I was looking at these pics, all I could here was a good ol’ fashion banjo pickin’ tune
Is it just me or has her forehead grown exponentially?
Fish, if I am not mistaken, Bertney has trademarked this face. I suggest you a TM somewhere to avoid being sued.
Holy neck tendon.
that guy behind me is gonna put his penis where????