Britney Spears Needs to Stop Touring

June 17th, 2011 // 246 Comments

“Yup, she’s smuggling bacon again. Sonofabitch.”

Britney Spears launched her Femme Fatale tour in Sacramento last night, and I seriously don’t get how the state allows her parents to shove her onstage like this. How is this legal, but I can’t have a diner staffed entirely by people with Down’s Syndrome? (You bet your ass I was going to call it Corky’s Kitchen.) It’s bullshit, yet people somehow keep paying money to see a linebacker’s body crammed into skimpy outfits lazily perform basic choreography because she’s medicated into submission. If Britney’s mic actually worked, I guarantee all you’d hear is, “Pizzer Hut, Pizzer Hut, Daddy says do good and I get Pizzer Hut, Pizzer Hut.”

Photos: Splash News


  1. Britney Spears
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  2. Britney Spears
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  3. Britney Spears
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    And so the beast let forth a foul, monstrous fart from its nether regions.

  4. solo grinder

    god i miss the 80′s

    when $elebrities had the sense to fuck off and disappear when their time was over..

  5. Britney Spears
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    Britney’s clothes always look like she got them from the set of an early 90s porno.

  6. Britney Spears
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    she has great body… I love her…

  7. Britney Spears
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    brit is hot so dont hate and if you dont like it dont look

  8. Britney Spears
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    i pitty the fool , whos head is in her crotch

  9. Britney Spears
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    i pitty the FOOL whos head is in her crotch!

  10. Britney Spears
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    i would still kill to have an athletic body like her…

  11. Britney Spears
    Facebook Me
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    NOT an ass I would send a thank you card too.

  12. Bonnie

    Anyone who thinks THIS is fat has lost their mind. I feel for my little 3 year old granddaughter who, unless people get a grip on reality, is going to be subjected to bull such as this. I pray that the influence she has through myself and her parents she will not feel fat and unworthy if she doesn’t wear a size 0. Britney Spears has a beautiful body.

  13. MichelleO

    She’s mentally incapacitated. It’s disgusting that her people exploit her like this. It’s sick to even look at.

  14. Britney Spears
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    I swear I think she has a twin sister who’s normal.. Sometimes she looks so skinny and good and she seems coherent. Than there’s pictures like this..

  15. Britney Spears
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    She needs one of those muffing top-hiding flaps in the front !!

  16. Britney Spears
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    um, she’s pushing that 6-pack to a keg.

  17. Britney Spears
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    I bet everyone of you is bigger than she is.. step on a scale then go judge.

  18. Britney Spears
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    What’s unfortunate is that she is relatively attractive with a fairly nice body (if you like kind of thick muscly girls) but she has no idea how to dress. I don’t know if she is making these costume decisions or someone else is, but she could still dress in different sexy way and look good. But these just do not work and make her look ridiculous. Does she pick these clothes? Someone needs to have a clothing intervention.

  19. hahaha GO britney! lol he is hot ;)

  20. Britney Spears
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    If Fatney thinks sitting down is hard, wait till she tries standing up. Grunting is not sexy for women.

  21. Okay, so I actually signed up to comment on this, :P But has anyone seen “Interview with a vampire?” the one with brad pitt and tom cruise. There was the evil vampire in that, Leslat i Guess. she looks EXACTLY like him right now. The face I mean.

  22. Britney Spears
    Jack Bush
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    Britney Spears is untouchable She is the best of all time by far NOBODY even comes remotely close to her musical abilites. love you Britney Spears xxx

  23. Holly

    What has happened to her body, her waist is like a square block and no hips. I want slave 4 u Britney back.

  24. Britney Spears
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    people are such assholes on here.
    1. she is alot older now. shes not 16 anymore and she had 2 kids. obviously she isnt going to be a twig, like you all think every one should be.
    2. all this picture is showing is that she is truly singing. if she lip synced, she would not be push out and using her stomach muscles like that…

  25. Britney Spears
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    I thought she got rid of k-fed?

  26. Britney Spears
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    I miss 1999 Britney.

  27. Britney Spears
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    Smells like fish, but tastes like Cheetos.

  28. Britney Spears
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    I’d motorboat that butt and then bang the hell out of it.

  29. Britney Spears
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    Ahhh thought that ya’all had my panties!

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