Bertney Quit ‘X-Factor’

After realizing $15 million and a dressing room stocked with fried chicken and tater salad wasn’t going to change her into an umbrella-wielding Baby Huey, Simon Cowell was set to fire Britney Spears from the next season of X Factor except her people beat him to the punch by saying she quits and wants to “focus on her music” which is code for she has no fucking clue what’s going on but got pancakes this morning after promising not to talk to the microphone people. Us Weekly reports:

Spears signed a whopping $15 million contract for one season — and show runners were disappointed with the energy she brought to the show. “They paid all that for her to say ‘amazing,’ and offer half-claps,” a second insider said. Co-creator Simon Cowell, a third source said “wanted crazy Britney, but he got boring Britney.”

Call me old-fashioned, but if you’re trying to capture an on-camera freakout, maybe a smart idea would have been to not let her have free reign to get up and do whatever she wants even in the middle of filming. Seriously, all it would’ve took is one person saying, “No, Britney, you can have the six piece nugget, not the 20,” and she’d beat at least three contestants to death with a camera before someone finally tackled her and got her clothes back on. That or make her listen to Demi Lovato talk about bulimia and watch her mind explode. “You no put food in tum-tum? Bertney head so confused… Bertney SMASH.”

Photos: Splash News