Britney Spears’ Nipples are Business as Usual

August 3rd, 2010 // 99 Comments

Here’s Britney Spears leaving – Do I really have to say it? – yesterday where she proceeded to mug it up for the paparazzi while silently threatening to stab their fucking eyes out. To the untrained eye, you might be asking “Threat? How?” But to one steeped in the dark arts such as myself, it’s clearly evident she’s brandishing sharp objects at not just the pap in front of her, but also the one on the rooftop behind her who was wise to keep his distance. Because taking pictures of Britney Spears is a lot like approaching a rhino in the wild. You never know if it’s going to charge or smother you with its vagina until you agree to take it to McDonald’s.

Photos: Fame, Flynet


  1. Georgeo

    Aim low, Brit. Aim low.

  2. Britney Spears
    Commented on this photo:

    first! nice nips btw

  3. Sardonic

    She really is a national treasure – our very own white trash goddess. And it all comes so natural to her.

  4. pimp

    i can smell that dirty asshole through my computer…FAP FAP FAP FAP!

  5. Britney Spears
    Hugh Gentry
    Commented on this photo:

    her nipples are frowning.

  6. How many of those things does she drink? Those things are about 30 grams of fat a piece…hence the thighs !

    • RasputinsLiver

      Those thighs’re pretty damned gelatinous.

      It’s like they’re a cottage cheese convention on kankles.

    • McFeely Smackup

      it depends on exactly what drink she gets, but between about 2 and 15 grams of fat. so you’re off somewhere by a factor of 15 times, or 2 times. So I guess you’re an idiot.

      damn it feels good to be superior.

    • Superior is looking up the nutritional values of a drink on a Starbucks website? Aim a little higher in life for yourself bud !

  7. RasputinsLiver



    What an fuckin’ ugly country-ghetto cow. Not only does her face look like a sphincter muscle, but check out those droopy udders! If it weren’t for autotune this dimbulb bitch would’ve disappeared long ago.

    However, in her favor, she seems to have that ol’ glimmer of the great 5150 British Britney. Man, if only Pink Wig Brit’d show up again!

    Hey, I know Jamie did the right thing in corraling his li’l fruitcake daughter, But dammit, he ruined the Hollywood trainwreck of all Hollywood trainwrecks. Not even Lindsay could come close to Shitney for uber insane-in-the-membrane craziness.

    Jamie! let Brit be Brit, dammit! Give us our 5150 Shitney back!!


    • aye wig-out umbrella brit was facking brilliant :) well cept when you rem she’s the mother of two young kids then it’s a little sad. but guess what she has new tracks coming out any day. laugh at her nips as she laughs all the way to… oh yeah.

      too bad papa jamie isn’t in charge of linday’s business too..

      • RasputinsLiver

        There’s striking difference between Linds an’ Brit.

        5150/Faux Brit Speaking/Pink Wig/Shaved head Britney ruled! That…was real entertainment. Every damn day there some really crazy cool stuff she was doing or saying.

        Lindsays’ just your typical out of control diva addict. She’s boring as can be.

        I’d let Jamie take care of Linds if only he’d return 5150 Britney to us.

  8. TheListener

    Pretty and perky nipples. Love ‘em! :)

  9. Britney Spears
    Commented on this photo:

    When will it be “cool” to take care of yourself or to have some class? Glad she can be comfortable, but enough already.

  10. Lindsay's Left Lip

    Leave Britney ALONE!

  11. Britney Spears
    Commented on this photo:

    if her nipples pointed in the direction youd expect a young womans too, I’d say she looked pretty hot here, but damn those saggy boobs are a deal breaker. South is no good girl. She should’ve taken better care of them when she was banging out those K-spawn.

  12. Britney Spears
    Commented on this photo:

    She should have some ropes implanted to torque those things in the same direction. They could mount the extra length into her wide, wide, man neck.

  13. Katie

    Remember that skit on SNL years ago? I think it permanently dislocated her nipples. One’s pointing up, the other is pointing down.

  14. Britney Spears
    Commented on this photo:

    not only are they pointing the wrong direction… one is higher than the other, like a chameleon’s eyes. not sexy.

  15. sean

    I like having sex with 12 year old boys.

  16. yoga instructor

    “Ok, class, first we’re going to do Dimpled Thighs, then proceed to Beer Gut and end with Downward Nipple.”

  17. Doc Schweinstrudel

    She looks fine to me. I am SO HAPPY that she smiles now. Maybe things are looking up for her.

  18. thatdude

    Whoa…thanks Britney..

  19. HoarfyMcHoarferson

    I hope I never have to see those things naked. I might literally puke my stomach out.

  20. oh wow fish took down erin. i was just finally warming up to her. hmph.

    well so…. about that other chick….? too soon to ask?

  21. Mal gusto

    looks like a tranny in pic #11

  22. WhitePussyLover

    DAMN i still want to cum inside that woman so bad…….lucky ass K-Fed

  23. Kaz

    slut and hooker here haha

  24. Mr. Obvious

    Why does she look like she’s on something? Her eyes glaze over, it’s like looking into emptiness.

  25. Kaz

    I see just boobs

  26. Kaz

    Jump jump jump boobs feel pain

  27. Kaz

    Hey britney stop walk becuze ur boobs more cray and pain

  28. Kaz

    Nipples ?!

  29. Kaz

    Hey britney go eating shit and put your face this new creame

  30. Kaz

    My dog want milk britney

  31. Britney Spears
    Commented on this photo:

    Starbuck’s went straight to her thunder thighs.

  32. Britney Spears
    Commented on this photo:

    She looks like shit, what a has been. Hit the treadmill and lose the cheese thighs. Pic #3 looks like an overstuffed sausage link, all she needs is some varicose veins to go along with those Bob Evans country breakfast stumps she waddles around on.

  33. Britney Spears
    Commented on this photo:

    as a matter of fact, I would like a piece of her.

  34. Britney Spears
    Commented on this photo:

    Hell I love them.

  35. Logan

    I will never tire of Brits awesome nipples….and im not being ironic – I love them wonky nips of goodness. dauymmm!

  36. Britney Spears
    Commented on this photo:

    she looks hot in a trashy sluty kinda way

  37. Britney Spears
    Cardinal Fang
    Commented on this photo:

    Pointy down nips. Motherhood. Good tits need nipples straight out or higher.

  38. Apostate

    Those unfettered funbags of hers are gifts that keep on giving….

  39. Britney Spears
    Commented on this photo:

    Oh Brit……when will u hire a fuckin’ stylist??? And please….cut those ugly extension, and get a short hair cut….u will probably look more sexy with a short hair-do.

  40. Masi

    She’s well on her way to looking like the goddess known as Dog the Bounty Hunter’s wife.

  41. Britney Spears
    Commented on this photo:

    She looks cute.

  42. Britney Spears
    Commented on this photo:

    It seems she’s drinking a sugary drink in every other time she’s followed by the paparazzi… Do they get more money for those shots?

  43. Totally Serious

    I like Britney because she would probably sleep with me. She needs to start wearing a bra though because I’m not going to want her if her nipples move any farther south.

  44. Britney Spears
    Weird Al
    Commented on this photo:

    Why is it so hard for her to wear jeans? Or at least a skirt to the knee?

    Maybe I should start slow. Bra….pull the straps over your shoulders. Click the back shut. Hoist ‘em.

    • James

      Oh please. In case you haven’t noticed, that’s like the unofficial uniform for all females between the ages of 15-30.

  45. Yo

    You can practically hear Crazy saying “haters gon’ hate”

  46. Britney Spears
    Commented on this photo:

    I like….I like….

  47. Britney Spears
    Commented on this photo:

    What is that shit on her shirt?? This chick isn’t even trying anymore.

  48. captain america

    milking the cows in CERRITOS, ca!!

  49. Britney Spears
    Commented on this photo:

    She looks every bit the crazy southern rich lady. Walking around without a bra neglecting her kids, smj

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