Britney Spears Made $500K From Product Placement

When Britney Spears’ new video for “Hold It Against Me” debuted last week, virtually everyone noticed the insane amount of product placement. Including Britney herself who was reportedly angered at the lack of French fry endorsements. “Y’all mean I just got money? How’m I suppose to dip that in sweet n’ sour sauce? Don’t mean I ain’t gonna try, but gotdamn…” TMZ reports:

Spears netted a cool $500,000 for various product placements in her “Hold It Against Me” video.
We’re told the dating site, one of several companies featured in the vid, forked over six figures to feature their site on Brit’s computer during the vid and saw immediate results … a 20% spike in traffic the day after the video premiered.

Is it wrong that I equate Britney Spears being a millionaire with a retarded man having a giant penis? No, really, think about it. They both have something people go their whole life wishing they had, but they have absolutely no idea what to do with it. Which is why I’m amazed companies are even paying her money at this point. I’d just show up with a cardboard box and some wooden spoons.