Britney Spears In A Bikini

November 15th, 2011 // 92 Comments

Here’s Britney Spears enjoying some downtime in Rio De Janeiro yesterday as a reward for letting her dad pump her full of HGH and shove her onstage despite the fact Walmart could get a tax break from the government for hiring her as a door greeter. The important thing is he that he didn’t just take her through the McDonald’s drive thru because God knows she wouldn’t know the difference. “Y’all ain’t tell me oceans gots McNuggets. I’mma catch me a Big Mac fish!”

Photos: AKM Images


  1. The joaker

    It must be “less terrible than I last remember her” day…

  2. Melanie

    I think that she looks fantastic!

  3. Britney Spears Bikini
    Commented on this photo:

    Hey, she’s looked worse.

  4. r

    she looks wide.

  5. it had to be said

    Surprisingly unblindness-inducing.

  6. cc

    She look somewhat tolerable by North American standards; by Brazilian standards, she’s an eyesore.

    • Never seen a Brazilian after two kids, have ya CC? Let me draw you a mental picture: Remember what the Ark of the Covenant did to that bald nazi with glasses? Yeah, it’s like that.

      • MJB

        Dude, I know plenty of Brazilian women in their thirties, forties and fifties who look damn hot and put most young girls to shame. So shut your mouth!!!

  7. I’m not going to lie. I would hit it and enjoy it.

  8. occam's boner

    World’s Greatest Mom

  9. Donald Trump

    To me she looks like her pussy would smell of sour apples.

  10. Evil Dick Tater

    Britney: “I thought I’d been all OVER The South before but the folks here talk REAL funny. I can’t hardly understand a danged word they say.”

  11. Britney Spears Bikini
    Ace Ventura, Pet Detective
    Commented on this photo:

    This actually isn’t as repulsive as I thought it would be.

  12. Donald Trump

    And why can’t this bitch, with all her money, buy a hair color that looks remotely human?

  13. These pictures confuse me :(

  14. scott

    i don’t care what anyone says, i’d still fuck her.

  15. Britney Spears Bikini
    Commented on this photo:

    Nice ass. She should wear a thong.

  16. Britney Spears Bikini
    Commented on this photo:

    Scott Disick?

  17. The Everlasting Know-it-all

    What’s the problem here? I think she’s looking pretty damned good

  18. My brain and penis are not agreeing on this one guys.

  19. That’s some good farm stock. I’d have no problem with that.

  20. Venom

    Definitely still doable.

  21. Britney Spears Bikini
    Cock Dr
    Commented on this photo:

    She’ll never again look “celebrity” hot…she just doesn’t have the discipline.
    But she does look “mom of 2 after 6 months of successful Weight Watchers program” hot.
    Now get a new hairdresser. That dark roots rat’s nest always looks nasty.

  22. Nada

    Since she doesn’t sing at her concerts (just dances & moves her lips to the music), she’s looking kinda doughey for someone who’s basically a glorified dancer. Ol’ shitney needs to retire and raise them possum youngins back in the swamp…

  23. TheSledMan

    I agree she’s a train wreck. But she’s always been “thick” even in her prime. Based on the past few years I’d say she’s looking great. Certainly better then Christina Aguilera is looking these days.

  24. Britney Spears Bikini
    Commented on this photo:

    indeed… that ass still looks good. I’d love to push that.

  25. Cartman

    Yes, I would impregnate her.

  26. Bilbo

    She’s got the shoulders of a AA college linebacker. She’s OK from the stomach down and you don’t put your penis on her triceps…so I guess I’d hit it…

    I’d just have to pretend I don’t see any masculine qualities cause I’m not Jerry Sandusky.

  27. Britney Spears Bikini
    Mike Nike
    Commented on this photo:

    I’d eat her bumhole like Hannibal Lickedher. Pffft Pfffft Pffffft.

  28. Matcher

    I would still let her go to the bathroom… on me.

  29. G

    Sometimes I think we’re unfair to her. On anyone else but her we’d think this was a pretty good body for a mother of two.

  30. Lucy

    I can’t believe I’m saying this, but her body actually looks great…

  31. she looks SO great! love her curves.

  32. Britney Spears Bikini
    Commented on this photo:

    for a mother of 2, or is it 3, she looks great.

  33. Britney Spears Bikini
    Commented on this photo:

    Still VERY bangable.

  34. Cardinal Fang

    She’s always had great hips, ass, and vag area.

    • Evil Dick Tater

      Very sexy vag… if you’re looking for a hairless Shar Pei. Of course like Jessica Simpson’s, it probably doubles as a gravy boat so there’s a little something for everybody.

  35. Stan

    @ cc – most brazillian women look good when they’re young but by the time they hit 30 they’re 40 pounds heavier than britney and have a Tash.

  36. Britney Spears Bikini
    Commented on this photo:

    I love you Britney you should have had my babies

  37. Britney Spears Bikini
    Commented on this photo:

    You are looking sooo good Brit.. i love you yummmm yummm

  38. Arzach

    I think I can drink a couple of beers and fuck her

  39. Britney Spears Bikini
    Commented on this photo:

    Yes her body is not that bad, her face is what is fucked up

  40. D-chi

    She’s looking much better. Good for her.

  41. licialicia

    I’ve been looking at this bitch in a bikini for, what, 15 years now? I don’t CARE anymore. She looks exactly the same, plus or minus 10 lbs, like the rest of us. I’ve seen everything including her va jay jay I’m sick of it. She goes on tour, 500 pics of her in sparkly bikinis, she goes on vacation, bikinis, she goes out, bikinis. I’ve seen it, I’m over it. There is nothign exciting here to look at, the thrill is gone.

  42. BrandiLye

    Britney’s looking pretty good, minus the raccoon eyes and overall trunkiness.

  43. BrandiLye

    Nevermind, she looks good. The other comment was kinda mean.

  44. Britney Spears Bikini
    Commented on this photo:

    Paige Emerick

  45. Britney Spears Bikini
    Commented on this photo:

    I’d drink her bathwater.

  46. Britney Spears Bikini
    Commented on this photo:

    She looks hot!

  47. Britney Spears Bikini
    Commented on this photo:

    She’s just wide. She’s always been wide, but she’s become thicker after having two kids.

    She’s still attractive. She needs to stop drinking and eating herself to shit.

  48. Britney Spears Bikini
    Commented on this photo:

    still worth licking all over, especially after a few.

  49. Britney Spears Bikini
    Commented on this photo:

    Hey, if you spent an evening with her, wouldn’t you go after it?

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