Bristol Palin Got Plastic Surgery

Bristol Palin has admitted to getting “corrective jaw surgery” in December 2010 which she not only claims isn’t plastic surgery but was a medical necessity because spewing absolute horseshit has become a new family tradition next to child birth relay races. Us Weekly reports:

“Yes,” she admits, “It improved the way I look, but this surgery was necessary for medical reasons…so my jaw and teeth could properly realign…I don’t obsess over my face.”
Still, “I am absolutely thrilled with the results,” she gushes. “I look older, more mature, and don’t have as much of a chubby little baby face!”

“How was I supposed to know magically no longer looking like I eat McDonald’s every single meal was a side effect of strategically performed corrective surgery? Now, if you’ll excuse me, my doctor just called and said all the fat in my belly has cancer, and I could die unless he sucks it out. Also, something about thigh scoops improving your cholesterol count. Isn’t science wonderful once you get past all the evolution stuff? Tee-hee!”

Photo: Getty