Brad Pitt and Anglina Jolie give money to Africa

May 30th, 2006 // 145 Comments

Angelina Jolie and Brad Pitt celebrated giving birth to their first daughter by donating $300,000 to Namibia to help other impoverished babies. Additionally, they also gave $15,000 to construct a school and community center for the city of Swakopmund.

“We want to contribute to Namibia and the people who have been so gracious to us at this time,” a government statement released yesterday quoted the couple as saying.

Considering nobody had ever heard of Namibia up until this little incident, it seems like the government should be paying them instead of the other way around. Sure they got a little privacy, but Namibia got to kick reporters out of their country and make up stories about their government officials naming the child. They’re like the pathetic friend who brags about how they get to buy the cool kid lunch and do their homework for them.



  1. Whipper_willow

    @96… funny.. I read the same thing and didn’t get that, but that’s funny! Like they gave the baby back… doesnt make sense.. that’s hilarious.

  2. PapaHotNuts

    I really think you are damaged.

  3. Whipper_willow

    Hey… I did post 100!!!!! I RULE!

  4. Whipper_willow

    Damaged… how so? You make absolutly no sense. That’s not even smart… at least cliches are smart.

  5. pinky_nip

    @100: Wow, you are original. Quoting MC Hammer. Your intelligence far exceeds anyone else here.

  6. PapaHotNuts

    I can’t believe you are actually posting to yourself under different names. You are the strangest person on earth.

  7. Getreal – Get real. Don’t lecture we Americans about the rest of the world, we foot the bill in blood and money enough to know about it. And America does donate more money to Africa than any other country. If you are going to refer to the EU as donating more (basically the combined donations of over twenty member countries) then you really are from Namibia, because that would make you a moron. And speaking of being from Namibia, where are you now? Probably the good old USA, on some student visa or exchange student bullshit. And if we are going to quibble about how much America does or does not donate, can we examine what we get in return for our paltry investment? Disease akin to biblical plagues (usually due to interspecie breeding), non-stop guerilla warfare, genocide and terrorism. What a return! I wish my savings account yielded that as compounded interest. So where are you typing your bullshit, Getreal? God knows the only computers in Namibia are a pair of laptops with Brad and Angelina mongrams. Fuck you and the rest of the world. America kicks ass as surely as Tom Cruise loves the cock!!!!!

  8. Whipper_willow

    No, it’s just a way to annoy you. Seriously, I have said a thousand and twelve things that put the stupids (nottahotbutt) in their places… and you notice that one? Just proves to me that you read EVERYTHING I write and are OBSESSED with me!

  9. Whipper_willow

    Strange, to me, is being stupid by posting nasty swearing things… that’s stange. I just don’t understand why you would be so strange to degrade yourself so???!

  10. PapaHotNuts

    @109 – Check your email you fucking twat.

  11. spatz

    holy shit its talking to itself!!

  12. spatz

    its going to start springing offspring from its head soon. run

  13. katie

    while thank you for defending me willow, you really are talking to yourself on this board. its weird. and no, i am not lame bananas or whatever that dudes name is. i am an entirely separate person feed me chocolate who thinks you need to get a job and a life. and stop procreating.

  14. “We want to contribute to Namibia and the people who have been so gracious to us at this time,”

    Ha. Like the Namibians had any choice. Kind of like the frogs in a pond have a choice to let water buffalo in or not and poop in their water. I think they have more important things on their minds, like finding food to eat.

  15. aivilo

    I don’t think Katie is lambananas or whipperwhatever. She’s too scathingly intelligent…and not 12.

    Eh…I can’t think of anything funny to say regarding charity work. It’s pretty good any way you slice it.

  16. Fa Cube Itches

    Ahh Africa. We can feed a family of four for 17 cents a day. Shouldn’t we be able to kill them for less? They deserve it, too – if nothing else, just for inspiring Toto to write that annoying song. Oh, and for getting Bono to flap his gums incessantly.

  17. sweetcheeks

    Fa Cube, I’ve missed you.

    I have always been of the mindset that Africa must be destroyed. They call it the “Dark Continent” for a reason — namely, because over there things like electricity and education are an overrated luxury.

    Can I get a “whoo-hah, ethnic cleansing”?

  18. gogoboots

    Or you could just puke because there’s been such hoopla over this offspring…hopefully she’ll end up addicted to heroin or something to combat the imminent perfection of the Brangelina coupling-hood!

  19. Fa Cube Itches

    With those two as parents, I think the odds of ol’ Shiloh spiking up are pretty good. In fact, I think I’ll send her a spoon and a lighter for her first birthday. But it will be a cute one with duckies and bunnies on it.

  20. Fa Cube Itches

    Hiya sweetcheecks! :)

    It would be fun to be a Minister of Tourism in Africa:

    “Africa…It’s closer than Hell!”

    “Zimbabwe…C’mon! We’re not really THAT fucked up!”

    “Somalia…10,000 pirates can’t be wrong!”

  21. sweetcheeks

    I pledge myself to your teachings, Fa Cube..


  22. sweetcheeks

    “Rwanda — home of gorillas AND guerillas.”

    “Visit beautiful Kenya! Bring a Bible and some vaccines.”

    “Where “Herion-Chic” comes to die: Ethiopia.”

    “South Africa — got white people?”

  23. Fa Cube Itches

    “Egypt…Because you PROBABLY won’t get blown up!”

    “Congo…23 days without a revolu- Damn!”

    “Rwanda…Famous hotels!!! Well, one, anyway.”

  24. ptprez


    ater a night of drinking on my vacation i’m back…

    whipper-fuck-stick…you have no clue what you’re talking about… you throw out shit, but you are the most insecure fuck up i’ve read…allow me to fuck your ass and take you back to reality…

    the views expressed by the poster are not ment at this time…

  25. ptprez

    *AFTER*…can you tell…

  26. Jeremy1Esq

    That donation is equivalent to Namibia’s GNP so they will soon have a national day in their honor.

  27. herbiefrog

    i think you misheard
    brangie babes

    it wasnt 70 thousand
    or even 7 mill

    or even 70 mill

    i heard

    could spare

    so lets see it

    now is good

    lol bitches, did you think
    was going to be#

    waiting for news

  28. ptprez

    hey frog.. can you stop the stupid hykoo(SP) shit…

  29. Ari

    I think the word you were going for is ‘haiku’, and his posts are much too long to be that anyway, but I get your meaning.

    I’m going to start closing every post with ‘lol bitches’ just because…

  30. PeteMcLochness

    I think that it would have been a great honor if they had named the baby “Shakaka,” after the sacred bat of the Wachati Tribe.

    *hand jive*
    Chim-Chimminy, Chim-Chim, Cha-ROOO!

    P.S. Your Balls are showing. Bumble-Bee Tuna

  31. suzy

    is it me, or does brad look like bill clinton in that picture

  32. deckard

    Man its all a bunch of BullS$#^%, that 300K was for the Nambian King/President for keeping the photographers away, theyre probably want to sell the first shots of thier kid to OK! Magazine for 3 million!
    The only donation they did was the 15K for the school.

  33. ir0ny!

    71 & 82:

    Thank you for your comments. From your comments & from others I’ve seen elsewhere, I am making the resolve to not donate to anything for Africa again. Obviously you guys just expect us Americans to pour down our hard-earned money to you, while you don’t do anything for yourselves. Why should America give anything anyway? Is anyone donating to help us with our domestic problems? American just doesn’t advertise their own problems to the world, but there are plenty of issues here that are being under-addressed. Would you like to be an advocate for us here? If you do, maybe you can start by denouncing the immoral relationship that Brangelina has. If people would realize that marriage before having children is the proper way, perhaps it might reduce our welfare expenses here in the U.S.

    But no, I know you don’t care about the U.S. just as much as how the U.S. does care about Namibia & Africa. So, go ahead. Please go make another AIDS baby & blame your tragedy on America. And please, do continue to be a slave to Brangelina & their dictatorial ways. Brangelina knows they can’t get that type of treatment here in the U.S. because slavery was banned about 150 years ago. So please, do savor their presence in your land, because here, we can already smell their herpes stench half a world away.

  34. ir0ny!

    131 – you mean, the “I did not have sexual relations with her” bill clinton?

  35. Frankkk

    giving a poor person money invalidates their existance. They dont own their school now, Brangelina(tm) does. f*ing rich people think they can buy the world and make it all better.

  36. slinkhard

    ir0ny, are you being…ironic? Well played, sir.

  37. roflynsolo

    You know I’m totally confused, granted Angelina is very pretty, but just what in the hell does one woman do to another? I keep seeing these “i’LL DO HER COMMENTS”.

  38. jackspratling

    Re. 137.

    Yeah, those darn lesbians. The nerve of them to try and create a relationships out of a bunch of rubbing and moaning. Just what in the hell does one woman do to another INDEED?

    BTW, I’ll do her. My wife might have another opinion, but hell, she’d probably do her too, and since we now know that a bunch of bumping and rubbing doesn’t count, who’ll be the wiser?

  39. Larilee

    St Angelina of the Bloodletting and Blessed Brad the Doormat. Honestly. We get it. Angelina is fashioning herself to be the next Mother Teresa. Not gonna work hon. She’d have to take vows of celebacy (blew that one, the slut), poverty (pfft, yeah right), and obedience. And she’d have to show a little humility there. Do good works, and shut the hell up about it. One only looks needy and pathetic when one has to brag about the good one does.

  40. roflynsolo

    The lesbos can do Angelina all they want, give me a minimum of 7.5 inches of thick rod anyday.

  41. ericisshort

    kudos to 71

    Not a fan of most celebrities, but I love the how they are criticizing them even when they do something nice. The price of being famous I suppose… but jesus christ! Making fun of starving Africans is just pathetic. Those people need our help, not our criticism.

    And Mr 15, how is 1000 meters per kilometer more “retarded” than 5280 feet in a mile. Just because its what you grew up and are used to it doesnt mean its the best.

    I come to this site simply for the irony of the comments. You guys are hillarious.

  42. oshkoshb-goshdammgosh

    Angelina always talking about Africa and adopting African babies is really starting to annoy me which is making me not want to sleep with her as much. Oh, wait. No it’s not.

  43. To_Bill_Braskey!

    #123 lololololol!!!!!!!!!!!!!
    jolie is still one fine ass lady. id still do her, any time any place.
    i have an idea, why dont angie and brad give a huge donation to the “hospital” (cough–makeshift!–caugh ) for “deliverung theyr baby”– in other words, “thanks for putting nambinina on the fucking name dropping list of exotic locals. nooooooo thanks. mosquitos and me are at war.

  44. donna7410


  45. I think Angelina changed Brad’s life. I also think Brad fell in love with Angelina because he saw a truly good person in Angie. Angie has never been pretentious and always followed her own drum beat. Angie once said about “acting” was a stupid job that pays well so she can support her cause. All those years in the past when Angelina was behaving recklessly was only her path to find her true self and calling. Brad would never have become the person he is today if he had stayed with Jennifer, for Jenny always seemed a bit superficial.

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