Brad Pitt and Anglina Jolie give money to Africa

May 30th, 2006 // 145 Comments

Angelina Jolie and Brad Pitt celebrated giving birth to their first daughter by donating $300,000 to Namibia to help other impoverished babies. Additionally, they also gave $15,000 to construct a school and community center for the city of Swakopmund.

“We want to contribute to Namibia and the people who have been so gracious to us at this time,” a government statement released yesterday quoted the couple as saying.

Considering nobody had ever heard of Namibia up until this little incident, it seems like the government should be paying them instead of the other way around. Sure they got a little privacy, but Namibia got to kick reporters out of their country and make up stories about their government officials naming the child. They’re like the pathetic friend who brags about how they get to buy the cool kid lunch and do their homework for them.



  1. tarjamarja

    #39, Feed_Me_Chocolate, no worries sweetie. You can make fun of us Europeans all you want, we’ll still be one step ahead of you (because of that time zone thingy). ;)

  2. Feed_Me_Chocolate


    Only if you give me chocolate afterward.

    *thumbs nose at lamebananas/whipper/katie*

  3. Feed_Me_Chocolate


    Ha! Good one. Me loves some Finnish? people.

  4. tarjamarja

    #53, Feed_Me_Chocolate, yep, Finnish. Love you, too. :)

  5. Iambananas

    Do they realize that people in America would be gracious, even more so? That people in America are starving and uneducated and in need of help. That really gripes me when celebrities think other countries are so so great… better than their own. The fact is, they will ALWAYS come back and most of the time stay.

    That was the stupidiest thing I have ever heard of with her having her baby there. Well, it might be a good way to avoid the paparazzi, but even so… it’s just down right strange.

    Angelina Turned Brad Weird. (A.T.B.W.)

  6. Iambananas

    In other news…

    Angelina Jolie and Brad Pitt celebrated giving birth to their first daughter by donating $300,000 to Miami, Fl (where the median household income is $24,000) to help other impoverished babies. Additionally, they also gave $15,000 to construct a school and community center for the city of Baltimore($34,000).

    Oh, no, wait, they don’t care about people from their own country. Correction.,.. Angelina dosen’t care about people from her own country.

  7. ptprez


    can we now refer to angie as ol’e dirty cum-bucket?


    yes please…


    go fuck yourself…

  8. Feed_Me_Chocolate


    I think that about covers it, we can now call it a day.

  9. Iambananas


    Nambia is like Scientology.. they’ve got a hold on them like a cult. Like when they said Chef quit South Park? It’s the same!

  10. Iambananas

    #57… no you can’t because name calling is immature.

  11. ptprez


  12. Iambananas

    especailly stupid name calling like that… it would mane a little more sense if you said that… like… feed_me_chocolate was ghetto… but you don’t even know Angelina to call her such a horrid name.

  13. ptprez


    please refer to the last comment on post#57…

  14. katie

    hey ptprez…are you feed me chocolates husband that she married and procreated with when she was 12? is that why you are so defensive?

    i have two words for both of you

    birth control.

    ok 4……trailer trash.

  15. #34

    Im with you id give it too her too and im also married. Shes probably the hottest chick ive ever seen

  16. Feed_Me_Chocolate

    Okay, please answer me THIS, katie, (lamebananas’ latest incarnation)

    Why are you so OFFensive? What did I ever do to you that you keep attacking me? You really need to get a new schtick. If you’re going to make up multiple personalities, it would be kind of original if one of them was actually funny and didn’t spend its time insulting me. Please keep your forked tongue behind your teeth. I’m so sick of you, as is everyone else.

    I hear your mom calling, she’s got another clog in her colostomy bag.

  17. ptprez

    yea, yea…angelina jolie is such a wonderful human being…she gives to the poor, works for the u.n.,has a baby in africa, cures aids, shits rainbows, and pisses pink lemonaid…

    she’s also a homewrecker, tounge kisses her faggot brother, takes it in the ass from billy-bob, and now has the herps…there goes my blow-job fantasy because god only knows what’s festering in that mouth now…

  18. ptprez


    you started this when the garbage flew out of your cake-hole…i’m just putting it back through your other end…

    you wanna be a hater, go for it…just don’t cry at the results…

  19. Ari


    Welcome to Snark Central.

    *goes down on pt in welcome*

  20. ptprez


    thank you, i’ve never felt so wanted…(weeps quietly)

    it’s like a syndicate…a family…

    …now help me with this zipper!!!

  21. getreal

    it is always a rather painful job, educating americans about the rest of the world (which does exist – get out an atlas, look at the world map, it’s everything outside the u.s.a)!
    firstly you should know that namibia is a country and not a city (once again, the atlas comes in handy). i know this because i’m from there.
    sadly there is not enough space here to sort out all the other misconceptions mentioned above.
    i do apologise sincerely for brad and angelina liking my country better than yours and my country people making them feel more welcome than you could.
    anyone’s bet why she didn’t want to give birth in america with a camera stuffed up between her legs..?

    p.s. thanks for the money – they only have it cause you made them famous – give yourselves a pat on the back)!

  22. spatz

    havent these two ever heard of “anonymous donations”

    youre not supposed to donate or give to the needy and then call a fucking press confrence making sure the whole damn world knows how fucking generous you are.

  23. Ari

    I can’t believe I got post #69 with that one… haha…

    Family, yes.. one big, sarcastic, horny family with a side-order of trolls. I’m guessing those would be the in-laws nobody invites but who always show up anyway.


  24. ptprez


    please, by all means keep those giant phonies in your country…while your at it , take paris, brit-fed, tc(ltc), oprah,o.j., lame-ass/katie/willow, and any other fuck-wad you want…

    …now go wipe the flies from your eyes and pass the gruel…

  25. Ari

    It does rather ruin the ‘I just want to help’ image when you broadcast like that.

  26. bluecanary

    WHY DOES HE INSIST ON DYING HIS HAIR TO MATCH HIS SO???? What kind of insecure douchebag does this??


  27. Feed_Me_Chocolate

    Posted by getreal on May 30, 2006 02:10 PM

    it is always a rather painful job, educating americans about the rest of the world…

    Yeah, it also kind of sucks when Americans have to save your asses and feed you Africans, since you’re doing a whizbang job at it. But hey, we’re Americans, and that’s what we do.

  28. Ari

    Evil Americans :P

  29. PapaHotNuts

    Is your stomach all bloated?

  30. BarbadoSlim

    While you’re at it #71 I would like to, on behalf of all decent God-fearing americans, donate to you Paris Hilton and Lindsay Lohan and all their collected works.

    Feel free to insert them up any body cavity you so choose. Or eat them, or whatever it is you godless barbarians do.

  31. ptprez

    thanks slim…forgot about LL…but then again, i’m not as smart as getreal…just another dumb american, duhuh…

  32. getreal

    no. 74, 77, 79, 80:
    there are currently no flies buzzing about – i trained my pet lion to eat them. and, no, my stomach is fairly flat.
    the most aid for afica by far comes from the eu, but thanks to you too for feeding us.
    should we ever discover oil beneath our country, i very much hope you will come protect us and save our asses, before some evil terrorists get them.
    oh – and please! keep paris!! she’s done enough damage in enough countries, don’t you think?

  33. kandyk0119

    I hope they get InTouch with their stylist’s soon, they both need major overhauls. Brad looks like shit and she does too. I can understand her looking homely, being prego lately, but come on Brad, YOU HAVE A RESPONSIBILITY TO MANKIND OR AT LEAST TO WOMANKIND TO STAY FINE FOR AT LEAST ANOTHER 10 YRS OR SO… MUST HAVE BEEN ANISTON THAT MADE HIM STAY STYLISH CAUSE SINCE HE’S BEEN WITH ANJ-HO-LINA HE’S BEEN SCRAGGLY AND SCRUFFY LOOKIN.

  34. Feed_Me_Chocolate


    So basically you’re one of the super rich in that country? Tut tut, those pesky AIDS orphans must really slow up your chauffeured Bentley. Why can’t they just go away and die already, they’re such a nuisance.

  35. Feed_Me_Chocolate

    And I’m sure you won’t ever have to worry about terrorists bombing major buildings and murdering thousands of people in your country, because you just roll over and play dead, huh?

  36. 86

    Die trolls.

  37. Italian Stallion

    I was always taught to stay away from the koons in the wild because they might have rabies. Did they teach you that in Namibia growing up? Trying to steer clear of koons out there must be impossible……..

  38. Feed_Me_Chocolate


  39. Italian Stallion

    #87 is @71 or @82 pick one…….

  40. TrannyGranny


    I for one am all for allowing the Eu to donate ALL the money to your anus of the world continent. All the money, charity, medicine, and help we send all over the world, and all I ever hear back is “get an atlas ignorant American”. Fucking Indonesian had celebrations in the streets when 911 happened, and we were the first and biggest response to the tsunami. And yes, fucktard, I know Indonesia isn’t in Africa, just making a point. Now go back to chucking your spear, and sucking our celebrities collective genitalia.

  41. spatz

    ok this thread has officially gotten out of hand. this is like world politics for the braid dead and insane. when you people try to sound like you know anything about world relations, it reminds me of how much i hate humanity. good lord

  42. jackspratling

    Who cares about Africa? The real response to #71 is this…

    … duh, Angelina Jolie only has the cameras shoved between her legs when she’s getting the close-up of MAKING the babies, not having them.

    And in related news, Pitt and Jolie have agreed to allow paparazzi to take pictures of them if the paparazzo in question can produce documentary evidence of having been in porn. The couple feels it creates a common bond between the photographer and subject.

  43. endometriorama

    she’s still a god-awful actress.

  44. Whipper_willow

    Feed_Me_Chocolate just likes insulting other people… spends ALL day on this site doing so and is especially obsessed with me and Iambananas.

    And, no, I did not make up 42 (katie). I have one screen name. Deal with it.

    And, you’re right, she doesnt need the chocolate… it goes right to her nose.

    She is simply obsessed with me and not posting on what the story is about, but rather what she can criticise other posters about. It’s people like that that make this site lame.

    For all the people who think that it’s jsut the superficial guy that’s making lame stories, that’s not the case… it’s the posters that get off topic.

    So, I will ignore Pinocchio (get it, b/c of the big nose?!) now and forever. It’s saying noting new anyway… I think of fresh things to say and Feed_Me_Chocolate just says same old same old (Lamebananas… all that proves is you can’t tell an “I” from an “L”)

    Now… BACK TO BEING SUPERFICIAL… NEXT STORY SUPERFICIAL GUY!!! And, please make it about someone juicy.

  45. Iambananas

    What’s the difference between paparazzo and paparazzi? It’s it the plural?

    By the way, I’m just killing time on here until I have to go!!! Fun fun fun.

  46. Iambananas

    P.S. When I read this story on yahoo… it said:

    “Brad and Angelina Give Back After Baby Birth”

    and I read it kind of fast and thought it said:

    “Brad and Angelina Give Baby Back After Birth”

    I SOOOO did a double take!!! That’s funny.

  47. PapaHotNuts

    You truly are in a class by yourself.

  48. Whipper_willow

    You too, except your class is low class.

  49. Whipper_willow

    See, now… I’m original and all everyone else is saying are cliches, and repeating the same thing over and over or swearing. Any way you look at it, I come out better.

  50. Whipper_willow

    Can’t touch this, na na na na, na na, na na, can’t touch this, na na na na, na na, na na.

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