Brad Pitt And Angelina Jolie’s Pre-Nup

November 17th, 2005 // 41 Comments

brad_angelina_thumb1.jpgThere are a lot of rumors floating around about Angelina Jolie and Brad Pitt getting a pre-nuptial agreement. Supposedly the major subject of the pre-nup is Pitt’s visitation rights for Jolie’s two adopted children, “who already think of him as their daddy.” A source told Star magazine: “Angelina wants Brad to give up any claim on her children in the pre-nup. I think he’d sign anything if it got Angelina to agree to marry him.”

I hope these rumors are true, simply because I’m tired of reading them. This has been dragging on forever. Nuns get laid quicker than this. And should it really be that hard for Brad to get Angelina to marry him? I mean, this is a girl who was planning on spending the rest of her life with Billy-Bob Thornton. If you can’t do better than a guy named Billy Bob, visitation rights are the least of your worries.


  1. I guess if nobody else has a problem with the kid wearing moon boots and a faux-hawk… then neither do I.

  2. laurelcanyon

    Why does Brad have cotton in his jowls? So it’s handy to dab the popped whiteheads on his pock-marked face. Or to put in his ears when the Asian love child starts bawling when Angeline forces him to have silicone implants in his lips. Or maybe he’s getting in character for a Godfather 0 prequel.

  3. suzy

    Aye yi yi… Jennifer Aniston was named WOman of the year by GQ not man of the year.

    I’ve lost some respect for both Jolie and Pitt, so I guess they deserve each other. And the best of luck to Aniston.

  4. Zanathon

    3rd Pic:

    MADISON: “Mr.Pitt, can you please hand me one of those empty plastic bags? Thanks. Now, mommy, could you place the bag over my head and wrap the bag’s handles tightly around my throat until my heart stops beating. I’d do it myself, but my little arms lack the propper strength.”

  5. > two adopted children, “who already think of him as their daddy.”

    Highly ironic, since Brad already thinks of Angelina as his daddy.

  6. MortyFishbein

    Please explain the relevance of Jennifer Anniston being called a WOman in this case? She surely can’t be. Once Angelina Jolie takes your man or woman, that’s it! You cease being human. That’s how HOT she is.

  7. sweet_elle

    I really don’t think she’s that hot. I mean everyone is always saying how great and hot she is compaired to everyone. But look at those lips, they are HUGE…and they don’t even look natural, they look weird. It’s like her lips consume her whole face!

  8. Shauna

    The son’s name is Maddox not Madison.

  9. derekd

    Can you imagine the kind of sex she must be giving him to be as pussy whipped as he is? I mean HE’S BRAD PITT FOR GOD’S SAKES!! If I were him I woulda already used her face for a spunk rag and moved on! What the hell is this guy thinkin’?

  10. Jivenut

    Thank you Sweet_elle, Angelina is not hot…not at all. She looks like an ogangutang got a colligen injection.

  11. Jivenut

    Editors note:
    Please excuse all typos, drinking and typing dont mix as well as drinking and driving.

  12. Excuse me?

    8 and 11 I also think that she is not at all beautiful. And I don’t like since she made of Brad a Brainless Maid. Yuck

  13. stevejuststeve

    “Why does Brad have cotton in his jowls?”

    I think that is called white hair- he is getting on in age.

  14. thetangledvine

    Lets see…Angelina Jolie isn’t beautiful, her child should ask to be put to death and Brad Pitt is a p/w’d pock marked scag. How old are all of you? If either of those mega stars who are both gorgeous gave any of you nay sayers a second look let alone the time of day you’d cream your pants before passing out.

  15. XCaptain Howdyx

    Brad is one lucky sum bitch and you all know it. I would load her up with alot more than groceries.

  16. erebus

    is anyone else curious as to why angelina is turning brad pitt into billy bob? i mean, there seems to be some sort of white-trash man fetish going on there. he used to be clean cut now he’s got that glued-on pube hair thing going on and the “i came straight from the trailer park” outfit…perhaps there’s some dark secret in angelinas past people should be concerned with…

  17. A scandal! One involving a fallen MTV star, nonetheless! Angelina Jolie has left Brad Pitt and is now dating Johnny Knoxville. The rich keep getting richer.

    Btw, does anyone have $5 I can borrow?

  18. becca11

    i feel like im taking crazy pills, how dare anyone of you fatties call brad and angelina ugly? i would be my life that all of you look like steaming piles of dog crap in comparison. it is widely believed that these two are the best looking people on earth… that means far from ugly. they have perfectly symmetrical faces, and incase you didn’t know full lips are also considered an attrative feature, thats why many people pay good money to get their lips filled, not to be ugly, to be prettier. Lucky for these beautiful millionaires , it doesn’t matter what some fatty no names say about them.

  19. becca11

    it was hard to type correctly in my rage

  20. becca11

    p.s jen aniston looks like dustin hoffman

  21. nyx

    i just had a question for becca11. -> are you so narrow minded that (what is largely accepted by society) is not by you? did the memo skip you when we all agreed that people are allowed to have their own tastes and mindset for what and who they believe looks good and what does not? if people don’t find angelina or brad attractive, then what is it to you? you’re not either of them, this shouldn’t affect you personally. more so, jennifer aniston has been praised many times on her good looks, i think she’s good looking, but if you think she looks like dustin hoffman, that’s your opinion. we don’t need a comment-nazi. but besides this, i’m getting tired of the brad and angelina news.. it’s about becoming a snoozefest. heh.

  22. suzy

    Poster #1 wrote “She even got a men’s mag like GQ to name Jennifer Anniston ‘Man of the Year.’”

    When in face she was named Woman of the year…

  23. MortyFishbein

    Jennifer Anniston is indeed a man and deserves to be “woMAN of the Year.” She was man enough to not slit her wrists when she found out Angelina “Man Thief” Jolie wrecked her home. Because if it were me, I’d have done that. LOL

  24. oshkoshb-goshdammgosh

    (ala Butthead): huh huh… you guys are stupid.

    Thank you, that is all.

  25. drowningfool

    To: Becca whatever
    Do you really think they care that you are defending them? You think you deserve some reward for being righteous? You are worst than the people dissin’ them…because you are defending them in hopes that in some twist of karmic fate they will appreciate your defense and it will somehow elevate you to their status. You are nothing…so start talking smakc like the rest of us bitter underlings.

  26. Angelina??? I don’t get it. She must have a 900 thread count coochie as we say an Arkansas.

  27. Viola

    Angelina Jolie is HOT! She is way better looking than Aniston. Plus, Jennifer Aniston is annoying. No wonder, Brad lost interest in her..
    And it’s not Angelina’s fault that Jennifer couldn’t keep Brad interested… she is just a plain Jen boring BLUH compared to Angelina!! :o)

  28. Member10

    I am happy for them. I’m sorry but I beleive he is a passionate person who has always wanted a relationship with PASSION and someone to inspire him and she does that. Jennifer used to say when asked how is married life, “Its good. You get to hang out with your best bud every day” and when asked if she was in love with her husband, she was like, “What IS being in love? I’m with my best bud” Whatever… I think he just wanted to be with someone who REALLY oved him and could SHOW it. I’m sure she is a nice person, I just think they were not meant to be together. they just don’t fit. She is more into going to secluded, posh, expensive spas and Angelina really has a purpose in life. She uses her celebrity for real purpose. You don’t see any blurbs in ragazines about her on the street and “who” she is wearing. She wears the same color all the time. It is just not important to her.

    What contributions has Jen made besides starring in boring movies? I think that is what impresses Brad about Jolie. She EXPERIENCES life ((charity work, flying planes, actually stretching her capacity as an actor-she no interest in being a “sweetheart” Jen is just the opposite.

    I just think Brad has evolved over the years and Jen hasn’t and that is it…

    Just a theory…

  29. assholic

    angelina jolie looks real good after god knows how many transitions she had since that hell of a movie hackers days. she looked like a dog’s dinner innit.

    jen, well, i dunno where to start before her friends days but she sure look hot as hell as rachel.

    as to jen or angie? if i was brad, i’d stay with jen after a couple of sex-fuelled sessions of an affair with ms jolie coz pls do tell me which man, no matter how many times he was crowned most beautiful or whatever sh!t from people mag could handle zillion times a day s&m? maybe rex from desperate housewives but anyone in the real world, no. case closed.

  30. Jolie is a mistress, Aniston is a wife. Has anything ever lasted in Angelina’s life? Passion like that burns out, it won’t last but it’ll be fun.

    Wish Hillary was still real and not a robot the CIA built to replace her 9 years ago.

  31. Arauna

    Being a staunch Republican I never thought I’d agree with Bill Clinton but….

    I think Brad won’t have a long time, but he’ll have a good time.

    As for Hillary, she has a few screws loose…Bill, maybe you need to send her back to the manufacturer ;>

  32. Viola

    To the last two posters, who said that “Jolie is a mistress and Aniston is a wife” and that it won’t last with Angelina… Last I checked, it didn’t last with Jennifer, either, so obviously she is not that good of a wife. ;o)
    It may be short with Angelina, as well.. but I bet it would be way more memorable at the end :o)

  33. assholic

    oh well, it didnt last with jenny coz brad pitt is stupid. he think he could handle angie but let’s just see how long he’d last.

    what’s with not admitting they are goin out anyways? last i heard they’re goin to some chat show and confess their love to the world. bloody eww indeed.

    i bet by the time they decided to do that, angie already got tired of brad and dump him on live tv. that’d be something to look forward to, though.

  34. Ying-Yang

    I don’t understand why people aways blame the woman who “break up” a marriage. I don’t particularly like Ms. Jolie, but I certainly don’t hate her because of this whole love triangle. So they fell in love when one of them is attached, it happens. If I were Jen, I much rather to be divorced from the man who now loves someone else. Plus being Mrs. Pitt seemed to have overshadowed her as an actor anyways.

  35. slinkhard

    I’d rather seen Jennifer and Angelina together than either with Brad Pitt, who’s the blandest of them all.

  36. Smugalicious

    This just in: Brad Pitt eaten alive by ravishingly hungry Angelina Jolie. Reporters in the Sahara noted seeing Jolie and Pitt on a humanitarian mission at a small desert village. When a windstorm toppled the town and destroyed the only roadway out, Jolie announced that she would have to eat Pitt in order to survive. The charming Pitt willingly salted himself for her snacking pleasure. In Hollywood, Jennifer Aniston smugly commented that she never once tried to eat her husband, adding that white bland metrosexual meat was not to her liking.

  37. STOP BEING JEALOUS, you all no shes the hottest thing out there, and she probably does more good than any of you, and i noticed none of you actually no much about her, so stop the judging

  38. assholic

    oh ok, angelina is hot, jennifer is cute, so ther, point settled. brad overshadowed jen as an actor, true but jen stopped bein rachel in friends and started bein rachel in every movie she will ever make, point is tht brad or no brad, jen will always be rachel, so there.

  39. xd

    I think both are really fucken hot and gorgeous… and I love Maddox’s boots;)

  40. jewels

    Sorry for Brad if Angelina ends up looking like her father;) Just kidding! So what if they are all hot right now, which I do think they are all good looking people. But doesn’t anyone believe anymore that when you get married, you make a promise to someone. I still believe it is something sacred & not enough people take it seriously anymore. Of course we all change as we grow but at the same time that is what choosing a mate is about. You get to pick the person you want to spend life with, the person that you will grow old with, & the person that you will go through many changes with, “together” Maybe Brad isn’t mature enough to handle that kind of responsibility.

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