Brad Pitt and Angelina Jolie on the move

June 12th, 2006 // 48 Comments

An official for Namibia said Saturday that Brad Pitt and Angelina Jolie have left the country with their children, after staying their for two months at a luxury beach resort. The governor of the region they were staying at confirmed their departure but wouldn’t say when they left or where they went.

It feels like Angelina Jolie and Brad Pitt are challenging us to figure out where they’ll appear next. Like a real life version of Where In The World of Carmen San Diego? only instead of showing up in common places like Paris they pop up in places nobody has ever heard of like Namibia. Their next press conference is probably gonna come out of Narnia and discuss how splendidly their children are getting along with the make believe animals.



  1. Proteon

    Warrant for Paris Hilton and we get this.


  2. lightandsweet

    blah old news

  3. pinky_nip

    I wish they’d visit the Land of the Lost

  4. jane's eyre

    I told you–they’re heading back to the “other” kids’ birthplaces, guided by Angelina’s tattooed coordinates, to drop them off now that they have the supreme being in their possession. Hope you had fun while it lasted, Maddox & Zahara! You have a date with starvation & squalor.

  5. lightandsweet

    hahaha @3 i was going to say I wish they’d visit Jurassic Park

  6. jane's eyre

    And way to go on using the same picture.

    Hee hee, pinky, I used to LOVE that show!

  7. krwlng54

    Dude…I know, what happend to Maddox?? Was he finally sent back to Cambodia! =O

  8. Dr.Rokter

    I wish they’d visit Funkytown and organize a military coup to stop those terrorist cocksuckers from destabilizing the region by grooving with so much energy.

  9. troubleinaborrowedsuit

    Maybe they’ll join a cult in East Asia and end up joining a mass suicide. Someone should suggest it to them. I’ll take care of their kids while they’re gone.

  10. Doxes

    Quick! If they’re in Narnia burn the wardrobe so they can’t get back!

    I’m sick of ‘em.

  11. BigJim

    Maybe little Shiloh will grow up to be beautiful, but I’m willing to bet that she won’t be terribly bright.

    A close friend of mine was a military advisor for Legends of the Fall, and he spent two hours trying to teach Brad Pitt to attach a bayonet to his rifle. The dumb fuck just couldn’t figure it out.

    Pitt also thought it was endlessly funny to go around poking extras in the back with his bayonet.

    And Angelina? Well, let’s just say that I don’t think extolling how “in love” you are with your homo brother to millions of people, or tattooing you boyfriend’s name on your shoulder, or starring in Tomb Raider II, are signs of advanced comprehensive abilities.

    Yup, I’m willing to bet Anna Nicole Smith will be able to outwit this kid.

  12. waterranger

    I think it was called “where in the world IS carmen sandiego”

    details, details. I heard they left Namibia because of a huge outbreak of polio?? I have nothing clever to say about polio. I hope it is containable.

  13. capanne

    Funny… Now that they have a biological child, Psycho and Dirtbag charter private jets sparing Shiloh all the media attention flying commercial afforded the adopted kids, “Hey you,” and “What’s-her-name?”

  14. cat

    They are back in Malibu. It is all over other blogs. Try to keep up Superficial.

  15. Despite how much everybody talks about them, I find myself incapable of hating them. Hmm..

  16. I bet they are loving us ranting on about where they are headed next! Who cares?! Forget them! Angelina is a complete weird whore! I hate her for stealing Brad from Jennifer!

  17. SpecialAgentWind

    I really think she had the C section b/c she didn’t want to mess up the names on her hooch. Old news I know, just keeping pace with SF.

  18. Jacq

    Didn’t they announce that they were returning to Malibu and LA so that Brad could film some movie? All of a sudden just because some bush-person tells us that they don’t know, it becomes a big mystery. Wack.

  19. jane's eyre

    The clicks and whistles are a little confusing.

  20. Aimtrue

    I wish when the go to the impoverished countries the would stop trying to make me feel bad and then run of to a beach resort. They should be forced to live in the little huts and eat bugs like the people they love so much. Hypocrites.

  21. Iambananas

    I don’t care I don’t care I don’t care. Doesthe superficial have another picture of them? They are really wierd! Orphan Angie has ruined Brad Pitt!

  22. Jacq

    If I were them, I take off to Candyland and you’d never hear from my ass again.

  23. RichPort

    They’re going to hit every continent on the planet. It’s her effort to figure out a way to get bored with him and try and steal James Blunt from Petra. If they keep getting 4 million plus for stupid baby pictures, they won’t have to bore us with anymore crappy movies. I usually turn the sound down on her movies then pause it at the part where she shows her tits anyway…

  24. HollyJ

    Next stop – Dikshit India… followed by Sexmoan Philippines.

  25. TaiTai

    I’m pretty sure they’ve gone to Neverland. That seems like the next logical stop on the Paparazzi Parade.

  26. Dr.Rokter

    #22 I’m sorry to report to you that the FBI has declared Candyland to be an unsuitable travel destination for American citizens in the wake of bombings at both the Candy Castle and US Embassy there, following the discovery of mass graves in the Molasses Swamp last week.

  27. yesdnil311

    An official for Namibia said Saturday that Brad Pitt and Angelina Jolie have left the country with their children, after staying *THEIR* for two months at a luxury beach resort

    Get it together Superficial. It’s THERE! Geez.

  28. rottnpagan

    I think the best part of this post is the typo.


  29. rottnpagan

    #27, same time but you beat me. *sigh*

  30. oshkoshb-goshdammgosh

    They’re moving into my guest house. I told them it was cool as long as they try to keep the animal sex racket to a minimum while my parents are visiting. Sheesh.

  31. tits_on_snack

    Hold the phone – luxary beach resort? Luxary beach resort! And here I thought all this time they were sleeping in dirt-floored huts and helping little african children weave baskets out of grass and digging wells.

  32. Jacq

    #26 – Lord Licorice and Queen Frostine did it. I saw on CNN that they are being brought up on charges of “double dipping” in the swamp. I hope King Kandy is OK.

  33. dominocat

    look! look at the picture! they’re both doing their blow job faces!

  34. JolieIsADiseaseRiddenBloodsuckingWhore

    Satan’s coming back???? Why God? Why? What have we done to deserve this? Let the plane go down.

  35. herbiefrog

    #18 a very succinct revaltion :)

  36. 86

    #33 i was just going to say that. Brad is SO her bitch.

  37. ChickenScratch

    Brad is coming home to me….

  38. ChickenScratch

    And he’s bringing his woman and his random pack of kids…*sigh*

  39. Jacq

    I think that Brad is trying to pouf out his lips in an attempt to make Ange look a little more normal. Whatever the hell “normal” is these days.

    I bet they put them to bed like in that Seinfeld episode where each Japanese businessman gets his own dresser drawer. You’d think that they’d at least get a bedroom for each kid. Misers.

  40. whatever

    I don’t blame Brad for leaving Jen – at least Ange isn’t totally bland & actually does things for other people instead of being a completely dull self-obsessed person.

  41. TrannyGranny

    I still think it funny that Jolie has made an entire country her bitch. The fucking Namibian government is doing press releases for her. Simply Awesome.

  42. JolieIsADiseaseRiddenBloodsuckingWhore

    While Denise Richards graduated Summa Cum Laude from the Angelina Jolie school of Skankology, “whatever #40″ graduated Magna Cum Laude from the same school.

    She feels it necessary to come here and defend homewrecking whores and skanks who date their friends exes. BTW, I don’t recall seeing anyone blaming Brad for leaving Jen. We think he’ a moron but I don’t think anyone has cast blame in this thread. I don’t spend a lot of time comparing Angelina to Jen because I don’t feel it’s my business to defend either one of them like some of you psycho adolescents who cannot be happy for their bloodsucking idol without bashing somebody else. Why do you do that? Out of guilt maybe? Does it make you feel better to try and justify her butting into yet another relationship? Really, don’t waste our time with it. Go cut yourself, suck a little blood and masturbate to Angelina Jolie playing tonsil hockey with her brother. You’ll feel all better again.

  43. Jenners

    Didn’t you hear? Angelina and Brad have to get back to the states for the baby shower that ex-Jen and Brad’s mom are throwing for Angelina and baby Shiloh.


  44. Jenners

    Didn’t you hear? Brad had to get Angelina back to the states for the baby shower that Jen and Brad’s mom are throwing for her and baby Shiloh. All in the family baby.

  45. shorepauly

    The Chamelain strikes again, man this guy is good at playing monkey see monkey do with what ever chick he is with that week.

  46. sexybaby

    gee you both most be good at the oral thing and it seems like you are always ready for it. regard less of the time and place once nature calls you are on it. good job keep it up

  47. sexybaby

    gee you both most be good at the oral thing and it seems like you are always ready for it. regard less of the time and place once nature calls you are on it. good job keep it up

  48. sexybaby

    gee you both most be good at the oral thing and it seems like you are always ready for it. regard less of the time and place once nature calls you are on it. good job keep it up

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