Brad Pitt and Angelina Jolie lose baby photos

June 27th, 2006 // 71 Comments

Brad Pitt and Angelina Jolie are pissed because somebody has stolen a digital memory card with pictures from their private baby shower for Shiloh. Their lawyers have sent out letters threatening anybody who publishes the pictures, saying:

“Anyone who publishes, disseminates, displays or otherwise exploits” the pictures faces “legal action … seeking compensatory and punitive damages, statutory damages for copyright violations and attorneys’ fees,” says the letter signed by Yael Holtkamp of the top celebrity firm Lavely & Singer. The letter says police are investigating the theft and that any outlet that buys the photos “will be engaged in purchasing stolen property,” which is a crime. A spokesman for the Los Angeles Police Department said he did not know which law enforcement agency was probing the theft because it was unclear where and when the memory card was snatched.

It’d be pretty funny if a week from now Angelina Jolie was doing the laundry and found the memory card mixed in with her old clothes. Like one of those old guys who have their glasses on their head and start scouring the house looking for them, eventually beating their wife after concluding she must have hid them again. And after a good wife beating they maybe wander down the neighborhood in their underwear and start screaming at young people for haivng their rock and roll music.

superficial

  1. It would be quite funny indeed if she found them in her pocket….

  2. So much for raising more charity donations with those baby shower photos!

    I fully expect them to sue the pants off of anyone who tries to publish them.

    http://www.wehateeverybody.com

  3. jane's eyre

    I think they just forgot that it’s lodged up Brad’s ass.

  4. so2315

    4th!!!!

  5. Philip Ramirez

    4th will suffice.

  6. Philip Ramirez

    Okay, nm then. 5th* will suffice.

  7. daisyduke

    we’ve all seen the baby already, whooooo cares?

  8. DonLes91

    I care. Is there a reward? I need to pay my truck off.

  9. Jacq

    Said memory card could probably be virtually undetectable in one of the craters on Brad’s face.

  10. Lawrence

    Well it makes sense the whole deal about privacy and make making money with the pics… anyway here is my new video if you like to watch bulges. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-T2giX6aNck

  11. oshkoshb-goshdammgosh

    A poll in Newsweek revealed that 75% of Americans prefer Jennifer Aniston to Angelina Jolie. The poll did not specify whether they would prefer to have sex with them, see them in a movie, sympathize with their relationship with Brad Pitt, or strap them to a rocket which would then launch them into the sun.
    Anyway, I just wanted to point out what a poignant and relevant publication Newsweek is. And that nobody wants your ugly baby pictures you creepy homewrecking slut.

  12. pinky_nip

    Maddox probably stole the fucker and flushed it down the shitter.

  13. tits_on_snack

    Christ. Get over yerselves, Jolie-Pitts.
    I think it would be great if somebody went up to them and was like “Oh yeah here, this was left in your rental car. Nobody cares about your stupid baby pictures.”

  14. pinky_nip

    I once had photos of me in a shower stolen.

    Okay, so I sold them, but I did get ripped off.

  15. superstar26

    tee hee #8

  16. TurndaPaige

    And don’t you just love this picture? Like they’re both auditioning for who can give the best blow job!

  17. The pictures were published everywhere. I saw them. They were cute.

  18. trulymadlydeeplytori

    why was i wrong to take that card? it was just sitting there, i thought it was for everyone to use.

  19. Wow Just Wow

    Aren’t these two supposed to be saving the world? Instead they are threatening everyone and abusing their power…much like the way they shut down international borders in Namibia.

  20. danielle

    what? did they have a stripper at the bash or something?

  21. TheCahMcCah

    You’re assuming that the Jolie-Pitts soil their clothes and need them washed, which I think we can all agree, they have moved beyond. That’s why Brad doesn’t need to shower. They’re better than all of us dirty, dirrrrty mortals.

  22. cruzin333

    #8 LMAO!

    But how could someone steal that memory card? If it was that important, they should have kept an eye on it a little more closely. Leave it to celebrities to sue for anything and its momma.

  23. S_M_G

    I saw one of the pictures and they were of Brad and Angie since it was a baby shower and no baby!They were incredibly cute pictures and they looked so happy!By the way i don’t understand people who prefer Jen, she has done nothing but star in friends and be a glammed up hollywood star.she wouldn’t last a day in Africa.

  24. yuckyfresh

    @1 – read my mind. a la homer and his remote.

  25. RichPort

    Did TC visit them? This has to be investigated. He may being trying to pass off these as pics of his non-existent kid. And he has no kid of course because he LTC.

  26. oshkoshb-goshdammgosh

    Is it just me, or does Maddox have the tightest little ass? He is such a biscuit.

  27. causewerecountry

    yeah- baby pictures. the memory card has baby pictures if thats what they call ridiculous sex photos of Ang sticking all kinds of weird shit up Brad’s ass…she kinky like that you know…haha
    technology is a bitch isn’t it Brad?

  28. Precisely

    No one would ever know if it does turn up in their possession somewhere because they don’t want to look like fools.

  29. yuckyfresh

    @9 – how dare you.

  30. yuckyfresh

    #26 – you are becoming my favorite ;)

  31. Precisely

    #26-
    lmao

  32. jane's eyre

    23
    Hah. Yeah, Angie REALLY roughs it when she travels to Africa. She lives in mud huts with no air, no bottled water, no 800-thread count sheets, no entourage, NOTHING. She’s real hard-core.

  33. pop

    first getting the details on Paris/Jose wrong now a typo in the story (haivng) – whose proof-reading this shit? Helen Keller? Because if so, give her my number -i wanna piece of THAT!

    http://www.popculturepundit.blogspot.com/

  34. Iambananas

    Pshhh… I bet they just lost it.. you know, while angelina was banging brad up the poop shoot.

  35. herbiefrog

    the header photo will do for now…

    …can everyone just

    SUCK

    lol bitches

  36. jane's eyre

    33

    It’s “who’s”. Hm.

  37. Gotta love these stars that bitch and moan about privacy and the “war” being waged on them by mercenary photogs, then threaten legal action when they lose a memory card chock full of pics. We all know it’s about money, not memories. The Joilie-Pitts (God that sounds haughty) want every last dime those snapshots can fetch them. That, or there are a few of Angie wearing a Tom Cruise signature strap-on and Brad bent over in Lara Croft drag anxiously waiting to get in touch with his feminine side.

  38. pop

    36.

    now you done make fun of my well grammar…yet again, that nobel prize for writing stuff has slipped between my male model-esque fingers…

  39. Linnea

    I don’t remember anybody stealing pictures of Maddox and Zahara. Oh yeah wait! Those are the “brown” children not the pure leaders of the Aryan race.
    We should just shut them in the ugly children cage and let them develope cocaine habits and kill innocent pedestrians.

  40. biatcho

    In this picture they look like the most adorable couple, almost as if they’re saying the exact same thing… and then they looked at each other lovingly as if to say “oh honey, you know me so well” but really Angelina Jolie stood up, kicked her chair back, dragged Pitt away from the table by his dick & then ripped it off screaming “Get out of my head you little faggot”.

  41. Nina

    “I don’t remember anybody stealing pictures of Maddox and Zahara. Oh yeah wait! Those are the “brown” children not the pure leaders of the Aryan race.”
    Actually 39, the pictures were of the shower, therefore, no “white” baby, there was some however of Angie and Zahara that were adorable.

  42. tarjamarja

    So are they pissed because the card got lost and they lost the pictures OR because the card got lost and someone might publish the pictures? If it’s the latter, sheesh, get over it. If it’s the first alternative, why didn’t they backup? Backup people! BACKUP!!

  43. tits_on_snack

    #23 “i don’t understand people who prefer Jen, she has done nothing but star in friends and be a glammed up hollywood star.she wouldn’t last a day in Africa.”

    Lawl. Ok, not that I’m a big ol’ Jennifer Aniston lover or anything because frankly I could give a shit about any of them… But it’s not like the Jolie-Pitts were sleeping on dirt floors in mud huts, and helping people dig wells and plant crops and finding cures for malaria. They were vacationing in an expensive, posh, luxury resort.

  44. Jacq

    Crater-face! Crater-face! Crater-face!
    Holy shit! Bloody Mary just appeared at my desk.

  45. Nina

    “So are they pissed because the card got lost and they lost the pictures OR because the card got lost and someone might publish the pictures?”
    ha! They can find them all over the internet- the same people they’re threatening to sue. Why don’t they just buy them back from the guy who’se offering them to all the tabloids and celeb sites? he claims to have over 250 shots.

  46. baratdoherty

    42 – LOL!

  47. IFuckingHateYou

    The memory stick was stolen by a poor, starving Ethiopian orphan who sold the pictures to buy his sister & mother back from the local pimp.
    Now that cunt Angelina is going to sue the poor bastard.
    The good news is that after she sures him, she will give him a bowl of rice and a fly swatter so he can live in comfort.

  48. ESQ

    Seriously, it is probably in the pocket of one of their pants OR at the bottom of the diaper bag or a purse. Christ! Just look for your shit like everyone else. I can’t wait for this to blow-up in their faces!

  49. IFuckingHateYou

    SUES him – she sure as fuck won’t “sure” him.

  50. CDob

    You’re assuming Agnie actually DOES laundry. Or that she ever has in her whole life.

    And yes, they “accidentally” lost the memory card of the baby pictures…

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