Brad Pitt and Angelina Jolie are better looking than you

December 12th, 2006 // 147 Comments

  1. clarknova

    eh, second?

  2. alaskanchicsickle

    Angelina is sucking Brad’s life force, run Brad before that succubus draws the last of your good looks!
    ps Nothing against Jolie though, she’s smoking hot!

  3. crabbie

    Yes. But at least I don’t smell like fried dog-meat from spending half my life in shithole Asian countries.

  4. clarknova

    Angelina is indeed beautitul, I just wish she removed those horrible tatttos from her body. Otherwise, shee looks almost as good as my wife.

  5. Seriously, Brad isn’t looking so hot. And his face is fat. And the hair? WTF.

    Angelina, as always she is beautiful and stunning. I want to lick her face.

  6. rmol100

    Angelina is God

  7. she’s a succubus. and she’s brainwashing you all. if she wasn’t “famous” noone would give her a second look.

  8. Liebestod

    Are you kidding? She looks like a GOBLIN! :0

  9. Folu362

    she owns him.

  10. Coolguy8621

    normall im a big fan of angelina jolie, i think she is one of the most beautiful women in the world but she is looking a little too thin in these pictures, and brad pitt seems to be looking worse everyday

  11. Anonymous

    I am not a lesbian but I would sure as hell do Angelina. If given the chance that is!

    Brad is turning into an old man. But Angelina does like them that way (i.e. Billy Bob).

  12. BarbadoSlim

    If pictures were words, these would say:


    team jolie!

  13. fergernauster

    She has lost far too much weight. Maggots ‘n rice 3x daily will do that to you.

    I do admire their combined humanitarian efforts, however. But I also secretly wonder when Angie will hit her next brick wall. I’m guessing sooner rather than later, judging by the size of her jutting clavicles and expressionless eyes.

    Fuck. She’s currently fostering THREE babies. That’s looney-bin fodder right there alone.

  14. spatz

    she is the biggest peice of shit actress in the history of the world. the only thing she’s good at is pouting and fake fighting. i watched beyond borders and holy shit i have never seen such bad acting in my life. she had one facial expression the whole movie. i wanted to kick her face in during that movie, she was so god awful. she’s hot as hell so it doesnt matter if she sucks ass as an actress.

  15. Anonymous

    I do find it odd that these two hardly ever look at each other. It’s like they are afraid if their eyes meet they may get so hot for each other they will start fucking right there on the spot!

  16. Yes, Brad Pitt is better looking that me…

    That’s not to say that he’s good looking…

    Actually, I think he’s starting to look his age! He’s sporting some serious rinkles.

  17. Discordia

    Good god, that dress is hideous.

  18. sitara

    Agreed that her face is looking too thin, but she does look pretty good.

    Brad, on the other hand, seems to be storing nuts in his cheeks for the upcoming winter.

  19. loonie

    Angelina is my role model!

    I am a recovering anorexic who just went into relapse when I saw her gorgeous skeletal figure.

  20. fergernauster

    Pitt has some grey in his stubble. How sexy is THAT?!

    Burn my bush, baby.

  21. sitara

    The first picture leads me to believe that the lining of Brad’s suit jacket matches Angelina’s dress.

    Christ, man.

  22. Angelina’s dress is great, her face looks great, etc., but the tattoos are so tacky.

  23. combustion8

    least he got smart and dumped that goofy looking bitch jennifer… nice upgrade my man.

  24. fergernauster

    “Brad, on the other hand, seems to be storing nuts in his cheeks for the upcoming winter.”

    Aha ha ha ha!!! Sitara, I agree. Sorta like a steroidal chipmunk.

  25. serial snarkalec

    I always get the impression looking at these two that the magic spell will wear off once they stop drinking each other’s blood. Then she will be left looking like the wicked witch of the west right before she melted and he will be found huddled in a corner drooling and rocking like a moonfaced mongoloid.

  26. fergernauster

    Brad is a young Robert Redford.

    Look @ Angie’s face in the very last pic… it sums her up pretty much, I think.

  27. 86

    yes yes we all know Shiloh won the genetic lottery.

  28. arrested-development

    What the hell is she doing with him? All the time she’s spent in third world countries looking at malnourished people has warped her mind, and she thinks this guy’s the best she can do.

  29. jesseeca

    she’s pulling a Mary Kate the way her back looks with all those bones hanging out. Otherwise, yeah they look pretty good.

  30. jonna

    what a wierd coupling. no matter how pretty they may or may not be, she is still a homewrecker and he is a cheateypants. ick. they look soulless in those pics.

  31. 86

    Everyone’s comments are so funny, it’s like we are all scraping the bottom of the barrel trying to find something ugly about the way Brad & Angie look. We would do better to comment on their character…but wait, they feed hungry orphans and villages and I sit on my ass all day….fuck…..surely there is something!!!! What could it be?? Well I guess I could say Angie is a dirty whore. There, I feel better. PS Brad is only going to get better with age, I fear.

  32. buckdawg

    Whatever! I’m friggin’ dead sexy.

  33. RichPort

    Dear Ms. Jolie:

    Please adopt me. I am from an impoverished section of New York City, many parts of which actually look ike Africa. You will get the fringe benefit of exclusivity regarding my enormous johnson. I await your response and shall leave my TV freeze-framed on you violently tearing off your shirt. I’m not sure which movie it is, but you seem to do it in all of your movies anyway. Many thanks.

    Love, hugs, and erections,

    P.S. Brad Pitt may need botox.

  34. 86

    15 I have always thought the exact same thing.

    Oh yeah and, Angelina’s back is kind of ashy. There, I found something.

  35. geez, jolie’s good, but not that good….

  36. jmouse

    What lovely people. I do wish however that if she insists on reducing herself to a skull-on-a-stick that she would have the decency to keep her hair down. Nothing like accentuating a neck that can barely support your head.
    Do you suppose when she is on the treadmill for three hours a day and eating nothing but bulgur wheat that Brad walks by and tells her “It’s different for us honey, you’re not anorexic, you’re a star!”

  37. kitty_kat

    Actually, I think they BOTH look awful:
    (1) Angie has lost way too much weight in both her face and body. She looks as if she’s about to collapse.
    (2) Brad is actually starting to look his age. And his hair is awful.
    That’s my 4 cents.

  38. Whammer Jammer

    Angelina Jolie has got to be the most over-rated female star on the planet. She’s not that great looking and she seems like a raging bitch.

    No thanks, you can have her.

  39. Paris Hiltons Wonkie Eye

    I look better then both these idiots, so speak for yourself. Fucktard Libtard Assholes!

  40. Screech's Dirty Sanchez Finger

    #40 I want to stick my finger in your wonkie eye. I really do!

  41. Word on the sreet is Brad has a BO problem

  42. seattleite

    Wow, that bitch is starting to get as skinny as Nicole. She looks a lot better with some skin on her face. She might be beautiful, but can you crack a smile once in a while???

  43. PrettyBaby

    Sheeesh Superfish, you said it. These 2 are such ridiculously hot pieces of ass that it is fucking astounding. I bet when they fuck, rose petals magically float through the air and angels smile upon them.

    And kudos to Brad for getting rid of Jennifer Aniston. Gots to be the smartest move he’ll ever make.

  44. ToiletDuck

    She looks good because she has a special beauty regimen, that of slathering her tits, lips and face with her husband’s semen on a regular basis – it’s her special beauty secret…

  45. shanonorato

    I don’t know, and I know a lot of people will disagree with me, but I don’t find her beautiful at all. She doesn’t have much of a personality, and those lips really annoy me. Take off her makeup, and she starts looking like an old shoe, too.

  46. PrettyBaby

    But Superfish, you are way wrong on Brad Pitt. He is so yummy and fantastic. I am gonna need to either A. Start some tacky Brad fanclub or B. Masturbate to “A River Runs Through It”

    Oh yeah, can you imagine the gut-wrenching pain Aniston feels when she sees them together? gaaaaaaHH!

  47. ToiletDuck

    I just heard that Jen broke up with Vince Vaughn – this is probably the most important bit of news of the past year, surpassing the North Korean, Iranian and Iraq crises, and I have soaked my pillow nightly praying for Jen’s continued good fortune and happiness in her life – I feel her pain…

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