Brad Pitt & Jennifer Aniston Are Texting, EVERYBODY LOSE THEIR SHIT

Men are stupid, predictable creatures. For example, if you dump us – or we stupidly dump you – there’s a 99.9% chance our first reaction is going to be, “Hey, I wonder if my ex will fuck me.” And the answer is maybe! Which is why we do it 100% of the time all the time. And since celebrities are just like us, you’ll never guess who Brad Pitt’s been texting. Us Weekly reports:

Brad Pitt is reconnecting with his past. Amid the 53-year-old’s bitter divorce from Angelina Jolie, he has “been texting” with ex-wife Jennifer Aniston, a source close to the Mother’s Day star reveals in the new issue of Us Weekly.
Pitt, who didn’t have Aniston’s cellphone number (they divorced in 2005 after five years of marriage), tracked it down through “a tangled web” of contacts so he could send well wishes for her 48th birthday February 11, explains the insider. “They started talking once he wished her a happy birthday.”

And while this seems like nothing more than the fevered dream of gossipmongers because, c’mon, this is too easy, Brad Pitt’s people actually confirmed that it’s real because “Fuck you, Justin Theroux” is apparently the message here. Page Six reports:

A source close to Brad told us, “They have been texting and have been in touch. There has just been some friendly back and forth, nothing more than that.”

In related news, remember last month when everyone was like, “Wait, did a pair of nipples just stretch all the way to the moon?” Mystery solved. On that note, holy shit, she’s turning to pick up her phone! DUCK!

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