Blake Lively’s Breasts Went to Comic-Con
I don’t know who exactly’s in charge of security at Comic-Con, but I guarantee my first reaction to seeing Blake Lively arrive would be “Are you fucking kidding me with those things? It’ll be like Auschwitz with boners in there.” That being said, let the record clearly state that the list of things I’d put inside her makes Green Lantern’s power ring look like a queer piece of jewelry that defends the entire galaxy.
POWER RING: “A sweet space condom that doesn’t feel like a condom and makes my shit all huge.” What does that even mean?
HAL JORDAN: Just do it!