Blake Lively Seems Terrible To Marry Is How I’m Going To Read This So I Don’t Kill Myself

October 16th, 2012 // 31 Comments
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If you hadn’t read by now, Martha Stewart helped plan Blake Lively and Ryan Reynolds‘ wedding, except it turns out Blake Lively also had eight million details for this thing which makes her seem like a real pain in the ass to marry with awesome breasts that wouldn’t make up for all that, right? (Nod in agreement or die.) People reports:

“She had pages and pages of pictures. She knew everything that she wanted from the very beginning to the very end,” wedding planner Tara Guérard told PEOPLE Monday at the Martha Stewart Weddings Bridal Fashion Week party in New York.
“The problem was she had 250 photos, and she wanted all those elements in her wedding,” Guérard added.

And what were some of those elements? Flowers for the dogs, of course:

[Martha] Stewart said her favorite part of the wedding involved the couple’s dogs, but was coy about what role they played. Guérard likewise was reluctant to give details, but revealed: “I did do some flowers for the dogs.”

Haha, wow, Ryan Reynolds, you just made a huge mistake. I can’t even imagine how bad you’re regretting all this right now, just regretting it so hard. But since I’m a pal, I know exactly what will cheer you up: A nice, friendly round of Hulk & Bubba: The Home Game. You be Bubba.

Photos: Bauer-Griffin, Fame/Flynet, INFdaily, Splash News, WENN

superficial

  1. hoo-ha

    do not want.

  2. USDA Prime McBeef

    high maintenance isn’t something that goes away. I bet she’s the sort of bitch that calls her man up for every little fucking thing that google can answer.

  3. Blake Lively Cleavage Gossip Girl Set
    Happy_Evil_Dude
    Commented on this photo:

    I’d fly in elephants if it meant marrying this chick.

  4. Troll's Nighmare

    250 specific things in her wedding?! I can hear Ryan quietly mumbling: Boobs, boobs, just concentrate on the boobs.

  5. Blake Lively Cleavage Gossip Girl Set
    Happy_Evil_Dude
    Commented on this photo:

    Even Blake enjoys checking out her tits

  6. Blake Lively Cleavage Gossip Girl Set
    Happy_Evil_Dude
    Commented on this photo:

    Hey kids, wanna know what’s in my jacket?

  7. Blake Lively Cleavage Gossip Girl Set
    Happy_Evil_Dude
    Commented on this photo:

    Wait, why does she only have nail polish on one hand? Is she just completely engineered from diffrent people’s body parts?

    • KC

      1. It’s only not on that one finger, if you look at the other pictures it’s on all the other nails on that hand.

      2. How the hell did you notice that? I’m a girl with an extensive collection of nail polish and I doubt I ever would have caught that.

      • Happy_Evil_Dude

        I don’t know KC, there’s a picture of her, her hands are visible, I noticed it. Wait, wrong subject. You’re a girl you say? Hey how YOU doin’?

  8. Blake Lively Cleavage Gossip Girl Set
    Happy_Evil_Dude
    Commented on this photo:

    No Blake, he’s talking to the guy behind you. Try again.

  9. Anonymous

    I fail to see any “awesome breasts”.

  10. Blake Lively Cleavage Gossip Girl Set
    Happy_Evil_Dude
    Commented on this photo:

    I know right? Who knew my “audition” with him would lead to a wedding?

  11. Blake Lively Cleavage Gossip Girl Set
    Happy_Evil_Dude
    Commented on this photo:

    Blake who? You must address me as “Lady Reynolds” now.

  12. Gary Grant

    Ryan Reynolds must have amazing patience or he is getting amazing sex.

  13. Blake Lively Cleavage Gossip Girl Set
    Commented on this photo:

    I fucking HATE high maintenance people. Nothing kills my attraction to a woman faster than that.

  14. kimmykimkim

    I don’t see a problem. The woman has the money and knew exactly what she wanted, complete with photos. And the husband probably didn’t have to do shit but show up, which, as we all know is the way that most guys would like for this shit to go. She doesn’t seem high maintainence to me. She seems organized and knows what she wants.

    • Al Bundy

      No most guys would prefer the shit to go like this: She comes over fucks them then goes home to her own place and the following night a different, hotter girl comes over. Repeat, repeat, repeat.

      Rich, famous, good looking guy getting married…. what a moron.

  15. Miranda Veracruz De La Hoya Cardenal

    And someone here had the audacity to stand up for Blake here once… when I said that she’s fucking annoying…

    I know women like this, and they’ll never be happy. Ever.

  16. Lou

    Probably the men who marry them will be happy. I can see that she annoys the women, but, believe me, I am pretty sure she does not annoy the men. Why would anybody be annoyed at someone who is beautiful, is well organised, is a good cook and wants to remove any obstacle hindering the path of her man? Men are seldom masochist.

    • Miranda Veracruz De La Hoya Cardenal

      Nope. The men who marry them regret not having signed a pre-nup. They probably regret a lot more than that but I don’t really care enough to analyze a shitty marriage.

      The men who marry these chicks are the miserable fucks at bars who have a tantrum over your standing next to them or disagreeing with them about politics.

      The men who marry these chicks eventually divorce or cheat, too. With nicer chicks who give good blow jobs.

      • Miranda Veracruz De La Hoya Cardenal

        My point is, Blake’s the type of gal that serves as a fuck story. As in, “I fucked her once… I think”.

  17. Burt

    Any before pictures of her because she got all that work done?

  18. Craptard

    Wasn’t she born in prison, since her mother was serving time for drug trafficking at the time? And now she’s Lady Fancypants? wtf?

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