Amanda Bynes Should Probably Stop Tanning Under Power Lines, This Can’t Be Healthy

May 22nd, 2013 // 46 Comments
That Was Fast
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Before everyone gets really confused, this is actually stripper Blac Chyna in Calabasas the other day who probably looks familiar because it’s who Amanda Bynes is literally trying to carve herself into. No, really. Via Fox News:

In a rare interview with In Touch, the actress-turned-Twitter-sensation explained that she modeled her new style after famed stripper Blac Chyna.
Like Chyna, Bynes has two shiny studded cheek piercings and sports bleach blonde hair. The 27-year-old former Nickelodeon star is also often photographed wearing heavy eye makeup, just like Chyna.

In related news, if you see a basketball pump in the background of Amanda Bynes’ 800 Twitter photos, call an ambulance, she’s trying to put it in her ass. (See, also: Car tires, Easter hams, Peter Dinklage.)

Photos: IXOLA/AKM-GSI

superficial

  1. Sheppy

    People pay to see her strip?
    Man, this is a fucked up world :(

    • schmidtler

      I had a friend who loved to go to the go-go bars in Newark NJ, and I’d go along even though the ‘dancers’ were pretty nasty looking with very few exceptions. I can tell you first hand that this Blac Chyna chick is not anywhere near as bad as some of the girls I’ve seen in the Newark stripper bars.

      • I went to one in Beaverton (Yeah yeah Beaver) Oregon and I can tell you, they had some incredibly beautiful women working. And the place was dirt cheap.

        Ah the good ol’ days….

    • The Illuminati Did It!

      The worst I ever saw was in Lawton, OK. Ugly, fat, greasy whore wearing horn-rimmed glasses and dancing in white socks (yes, they were black on the bottom).

      The other one was tatted up from top to bottom. Christ, you could almost smell the yeast eminatting from her crotch.

      If the sky god really wanted to make a statement, he would have started his spring cleaning with that place.

    • This whole comment thread about strip clubs is so fucking funny

  2. Cock Dr

    Today’s site postings are much….meatier that yesterdaze.

  3. Blac Chyna Enormous Ass Spandex Pants Subway
    Lita
    Commented on this photo:

    That is the fakest ass I’ve seen since Paris Hilton because “famous.”

  4. Hugh Jass

    Looks like a cross between Kim Kardashian and Tan Mom

  5. Blac Chyna Enormous Ass Spandex Pants Subway
    Commented on this photo:

    Not the first footlong to enter her body today.

  6. ThisWillHurt

    Why would it be an emergency for Peter Dinklage to be “inside” Bynes’ ass? She probably thinks he’ll dethrone Joffrey and make her Queen of Twitter.

  7. Pumping air up your ass, à la Jackass, might make for some fun party games, but do you know what isn’t a fun party game?

    A perforated bowel and sepsis.

  8. Jeremy

    Fix-A-Flat! Just connect, inflate, and go!

  9. Pepper's Pot

    by the beard of zeus… what the fuck is that?!

  10. Blac Chyna Enormous Ass Spandex Pants Subway
    elephantman
    Commented on this photo:

    One word “GROSS”. Wait until she’s fifty.

  11. Nasty and disgusting. Uggh.

  12. Blac Chyna Enormous Ass Spandex Pants Subway
    Deacon Jones
    Commented on this photo:

    Is Exhibit A, above, the reason why black guys will fuck any white chick that has a heart beat?

  13. Johnny P!

    I guess the whole ‘black men loving a big bootie’ thing is supposed to signify that their dicks are so big, they can doggy-style and still penetrate. So, the bigger her as is, the bigger your dick must be.
    But this chick?
    Charon would still be waving at John Holmes, Ron Jeremy and James Deen (not to mention any rapper who goes on and on about how big his tool is) to try to get them a little bit closer to the boat so he can ferry them across her skanky Styx into Hades.
    Oh well, give her 5 years and she’ll have her own ‘Reality TV’ series, or be featured on the ‘Wal-Mart Shoppers’ sites.

  14. Blac Chyna Enormous Ass Spandex Pants Subway
    Pepper's Pot
    Commented on this photo:

    grotesque.

  15. Thanks to Fish for getting me hyped up for Urban Beach Weekend. Come to South Beach Yall.

  16. There was a place I used to go to back in the early 70′s, just down the road from LAX. Totally nude beauties (serving real booze in those days), Happy Hour was from 2 p.m. until 7 p.m. (two-fers and no cover charge) plus they served free pizza beginning at 4 p.m. Great place…

  17. Are we sure “Blac Chyna” is a take-off-your-clothes stripper and not a works-in-furniture-restoration-and-thus-breathes-a-lot-of-weird-fumes-hence-the-cheek-piercings stripper?

  18. Blac Chyna Enormous Ass Spandex Pants Subway
    Commented on this photo:

    Parappa the Rapper here needs to lay off the scooby snacks. That tail’s too big to wag.

  19. anonymous

    Wow and I thought Kardashian had a sloppy ass. Damn….even spandex tights can’t keep that shit in check.

  20. Blac Chyna Enormous Ass Spandex Pants Subway
    rantatonne
    Commented on this photo:

    It’s like she has two baby ninja turtles clinging to her ass

  21. Blac Chyna Enormous Ass Spandex Pants Subway
    Commented on this photo:

    She should’ve “held the cottage cheese.” That ass has to be implanted. Or she is related to a Kardashian?

  22. Blac Chyna Enormous Ass Spandex Pants Subway
    Where's Dildo
    Commented on this photo:

    “IT’S NOT A TOO-MA!”

  23. Blac Chyna Enormous Ass Spandex Pants Subway
    amanda
    Commented on this photo:
  24. judgingyou

    So, she’s trying to become black.

  25. Blac Chyna Enormous Ass Spandex Pants Subway
    Commented on this photo:

    It’s amazing how fake tits aren’t that big of a deal deal, but this new wave of ass implants is TOTALLY unacceptable. It’s awful. The ass was like the last stand for what was real on a body.

  26. Blac Chyna Enormous Ass Spandex Pants Subway
    flaT
    Commented on this photo:

    It doesn’t even look like an ass implant, it looks like she shoved two throw pillows down there and was done with it.

  27. Blac Chyna Enormous Ass Spandex Pants Subway
    Commented on this photo:

    another satisfied customer of Oneal Morris!

  28. Blac Chyna Enormous Ass Spandex Pants Subway
    colt13
    Commented on this photo:

    That’s not a Kardashian, that’s a Minaj.

  29. Blac Chyna Enormous Ass Spandex Pants Subway
    Jenn
    Commented on this photo:

    Oh. My. God Becky look at her butt!

  30. Blac Chyna Enormous Ass Spandex Pants Subway
    Becci
    Commented on this photo:

    Black Chyna is actually really pretty when her hair is Black. She has a cute face.

  31. Blac Chyna Enormous Ass Spandex Pants Subway
    eh
    Commented on this photo:

    She has got to be making a mockumentary.

  32. Blac Chyna Enormous Ass Spandex Pants Subway
    Commented on this photo:

    NO. OK? Just NO. NOT.

  33. anonym

    She put the implants on the wrong end.

    nasty

  34. Blac Chyna Enormous Ass Spandex Pants Subway
    Commented on this photo:

    The butt looks like it was injected with fix-a-flat.

  35. Blac Chyna Enormous Ass Spandex Pants Subway
    Commented on this photo:

    DAT ASS!!! has got to go back to the operating table..they fukd her up but good (no pun intended)

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