The 2014 Billboard Music Awards

May 19th, 2014 // 71 Comments

Everyone that’s anyone (Read: Blake Lively‘s breasts) is at Cannes right now, but then again, timing isn’t exactly this year’s Billboard Music Awards‘ strong suit. So here’s some barely interesting people on the red carpet who didn’t get their own post by surprisingly not having semen on them which is probably the greatest compliment I’ll ever pay Kendall and Kylie Jenner. Cherish it, doomed ones. Cherish it always.

Photos: Fame/Flynet, Getty, Splash News, WENN

superficial

  1. Miranda Lambert Cleavage Billboard Music Awards
    Commented on this photo:

    thought that was p hilton in the thumbnail.

  2. looks like a star-studded event.

    A couple legitimate musicians, a couple non-legitimate musicians, and two second string Kardashians.

  3. Kendall Jenner Butt Side Boob Billboard Music Awards
    Commented on this photo:

    She’s obviously doing her ass exercises. But if she wants to live up to her family’s legacy, she’s gonna have to get implants. Front and back.

  4. Jennifer Lopez Cleavage Legs See Through Dress Billboard Music Awards
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    The light coloured hair isn’t working for her.

  5. Jennifer Lopez Cleavage Legs See Through Dress Billboard Music Awards
    jep
    Commented on this photo:

    Sigh. Just stop. You’re well over 40. Stop dressing like a 20-something.

  6. Nicki Minaj Cleavage Huge Butt Tight Dress Billboard Music Awards
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    Oh yeah. She’s bringing the heat these days. Only thing I don’t like is the nails.

  7. Kendall Jenner Butt Side Boob Billboard Music Awards
    Commented on this photo:

    She looks way too much like her mother. My penis is scared.

  8. Kylie Jenner Cleavage Billboard Music Awards
    Commented on this photo:

    Ah! There is again! My penis has retracted.

  9. Danica McKellar Midriff Billboard Music Awards
    Typical Superficial Loser
    Commented on this photo:

    I’d integrate under her curves!

  10. So only 8 chicks showed up to this nonsensical award show?

  11. Jennifer Lopez Cleavage Legs See Through Dress Billboard Music Awards
    Kris Jenner
    Commented on this photo:

    mmm check out grandmas sexy panties

  12. Miranda Lambert Cleavage Billboard Music Awards
    Commented on this photo:

    The jaw is strong on this one.

  13. Danica McKellar Midriff Billboard Music Awards
    Commented on this photo:

    Me + Danica = Restraining order.

  14. Shakira Butt Tight Dress Billboard Music Awards
    Commented on this photo:

    Where’s the butt? The caption says Shakira, but I see no butt. I don’t recognize the very attractive woman.

  15. Nicki Minaj Cleavage Huge Butt Tight Dress Billboard Music Awards
    Commented on this photo:

    Just as good coming as she is going.

  16. Jennifer Lopez Cleavage Legs See Through Dress Billboard Music Awards
    Commented on this photo:

    I get the feeling that if the neckline on that dress wasn’t so low, her underwear would go all the way up to under her tits. Taylor Swift style.

  17. Kylie Jenner Cleavage Billboard Music Awards
    Commented on this photo:

    Are your tits and stomach supposed to be level?

  18. Danica McKellar Midriff Billboard Music Awards
    Commented on this photo:

    Very nice.

  19. Shakira Butt Tight Dress Billboard Music Awards
    Commented on this photo:

    Hey, Shakira. Great to see you.

  20. Kendall Jenner Butt Side Boob Billboard Music Awards
    freebie
    Commented on this photo:

    Keep an eye on that ass. Its bound to grow in leaps and bounds.

  21. Nicki Minaj Cleavage Huge Butt Tight Dress Billboard Music Awards
    Commented on this photo:

    Beautiful woman.

  22. Jennifer Lopez Cleavage Legs See Through Dress Billboard Music Awards
    freebie
    Commented on this photo:

    She’s starting to age and all the makeup and fillers aren’t going to help her stop time.

  23. Jennifer Lopez Cleavage Legs See Through Dress Billboard Music Awards
    freebie
    Commented on this photo:

    Yup, she’s aging and it ain’t gonna be pretty.

  24. Kendall Jenner Butt Side Boob Billboard Music Awards
    Freebie
    Commented on this photo:

    Don’t worry honey – there’s implants, fake butts and fat injections to get it as big as your sisters’.

  25. Nicki Minaj Cleavage Huge Butt Tight Dress Billboard Music Awards
    Freebie
    Commented on this photo:

    She’s so much prettier without all the makeup she usually wears.

  26. Mike

    Stop posting titillating pictures of the Jenners, Fish! Don’t make me develop a crush on them, for fuck’s sake!

  27. Kendall Jenner Butt Side Boob Billboard Music Awards
    Jack Ketch
    Commented on this photo:

    Ugly AND gross. Utterly fucking repulsive.

  28. Danica McKellar Midriff Billboard Music Awards
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    So yummy.

  29. Danica McKellar Midriff Billboard Music Awards
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    So damn hot.

  30. Nicki Minaj Cleavage Huge Butt Tight Dress Billboard Music Awards
    Commented on this photo:

    Definitely looks better when she does not look like a clown.

  31. Kylie Jenner Cleavage Billboard Music Awards
    Randal
    Commented on this photo:

    This one looks like bruce..

  32. Jennifer Lopez Cleavage Legs See Through Dress Billboard Music Awards
    Casper
    Commented on this photo:

    How is this chick an Icon? She is a good dancer, poor actress and a sh*tty singer.

  33. Nicki Minaj Cleavage Huge Butt Tight Dress Billboard Music Awards
    Commented on this photo:

    I have to admit, I’m starting to dig her.

  34. Jennifer Lopez Cleavage Legs See Through Dress Billboard Music Awards
    yuck
    Commented on this photo:

    Angelina did that first! Start a new trend!

  35. Kendall Jenner Butt Side Boob Billboard Music Awards
    Urbanspaceman
    Commented on this photo:

    Surprised she hasn’t got her store-boughts yet.

  36. Kylie Jenner Cleavage Billboard Music Awards
    Urbanspaceman
    Commented on this photo:

    Do any two of Kris Jenner’s children have the same father? It sure doesn’t look like it.

  37. Kendall Jenner Butt Side Boob Billboard Music Awards
    Commented on this photo:

    So far the Jenner sisters haven’t done anything on their own that I find terribly offensive, so until that happens I’m giving them a pass. I think they’re both very pretty.

  38. Nicki Minaj Cleavage Huge Butt Tight Dress Billboard Music Awards
    Commented on this photo:

    “Waiter, I’ll have whatever that says on her arm. With fries.”

  39. Shakira Butt Tight Dress Billboard Music Awards
    Commented on this photo:

    Just look in the dictionary under the word “curves.”

  40. Kendall Jenner Butt Side Boob Billboard Music Awards
    frank
    Commented on this photo:

    check dat exposure

  41. Jennifer Lopez Cleavage Legs See Through Dress Billboard Music Awards
    Jade
    Commented on this photo:

    “Ok, who’s the smartass that told me this was a pool party?”

  42. Kylie Jenner Cleavage Billboard Music Awards
    The Dude
    Commented on this photo:

    HAHAHA.
    The ugly teen one already had facial work done? Wow.

  43. Danica McKellar Midriff Billboard Music Awards
    Spicy McHaggis
    Commented on this photo:

    FAP, FAP, FAP

  44. Shakira Butt Tight Dress Billboard Music Awards
    Mel Gibson's Shrink
    Commented on this photo:

    Typical Arab woman build – short legs, low ass.

  45. Nicki Minaj Cleavage Huge Butt Tight Dress Billboard Music Awards
    Mel Gibson's Shrink
    Commented on this photo:

    Still need a paper bag.

  46. Kendall Jenner Butt Side Boob Billboard Music Awards
    Robb7
    Commented on this photo:

    So cute — little, itsy-bitsy side boob.

  47. Kendall Jenner Butt Side Boob Billboard Music Awards
    Robb7
    Commented on this photo:

    Yeah, that’s right, get used to spreading ‘em. Mama likes her girls flexible!Rpbb7

  48. Kendall Jenner Butt Side Boob Billboard Music Awards
    fifi
    Commented on this photo:

    ass eats trousers…uargh

  49. Kendall Jenner Butt Side Boob Billboard Music Awards
    Commented on this photo:

    I would definitely hate-fuck her.

  50. Miranda Lambert Cleavage Billboard Music Awards
    Commented on this photo:

    Paris Hilton in 10 years.

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