Bill Murray arrested for golf cart DUI

August 23rd, 2007 // 156 Comments
bill-murray-arrested.jpg

Bill Murray was stopped by Swedish police yesterday for drunkenly driving his golf cart back to his hotel. Reuters reports:

Murray was brought to Norrmalm police station, in the north of the city, and given a blood test for alcohol after he refused to take a breath test, said station commander Jan-Olov Lundgren. The American had been stopped while driving the golf cart from Cafe Opera, an upscale restaurant in the center of town, back to his hotel.

A golf cart is one of two vehicles you should be allowed to drive drunk. The thing goes three feet a minute. If you hit somebody with one, they pretty much deserved it for having the reflexes of a tuna sandwich. What’s the other vehicle I think you should be allowed to drive drunk? A speeder-bike from Return of the Jedi. I can’t go into the details due to pending litigation, but it basically involves myself, an Ewok and a Mai-tai the size of a dishwasher.

superficial

  1. Bonzo420

    Stop using my name yo.
    420!

  2. veggi

    Looks like Bonzo is a Bozo or maybe he’s just on crack.

  3. Bonzo420

    Im the OG here! who wants it?

    o and by the way – FIRST BITCHES!!

    420

  4. Ed

    I dunno who this is, but I like the new writing. Much better than it used to be. Good going Superfish!

  5. guiytu8

    He looks like my dead grandpa

  6. Goddamn I am such a fag

  7. Ally

    Bill Murray is fugly to the max

  8. veggi

    53-
    OG huh?
    So are you a busboy there…. at the Olive Garden?

  9. veggo

    Hey bozo, I like the giggle bush as much as the next gal, but seeing as if you were twice as smart as you are, you would still be as smart as a bag of weed, you might consider cutting back.

  10. FIRST!

    There’s a new post and I already got FIRST! Haha, eat shit, ya slow-assed muthafuckas!

  11. Bonzo420

    I sucked off a sewer rat once.

  12. BunnyButt

    @17, I think all rich white American boys should be punished by having their backsides whipped. I volunteer to do it. With my bare hands. Mmmm.

  13. bonzo smokes pole

    hey bonzo, your vajeeeen hangs like sleeve of wizard

  14. The Real Veggi Is No Longer Veggi

    Hey new Veggi……You’re such a loser for taking someone elses name….. bet you’re in your sisters basement with your fanny pack and your neon visor getting ready to kick some ass at Dune.

  15. joeypants

    And yet jbird, you’re on an American website that exclusively features American material. Don’t hate us ’cause you ain’t us… douche bag!!!

  16. Veggi

    Dad?
    Is that you?

  17. Veggi

    Look SHITHEEL, I can post whatever I want by whatever fuckin name I want to.
    Get over it.

  18. hollyj

    jbird – Just cuz Murray’s an arrogant ignorant asswipe with a false sense of entitlement doesn’t mean all Americans are.

    @24 I don’t think anyone needs to fear the USA rignt now, since we have almost no available backup military/national guard. Our military’s stretched so thin that we’re the weakest we’ve ever been, especially domestically. We’re fucked when they pull another stunt on our soil because we have practically NO domestic military infrastructure anymore. They’re all in Iraq and Afghanistan.

    Thanks for the great planning, White House dipshits. Go stir up the Middle East wasp nest, then ship all our military out. We’re sitting ducks over here. Yeah, I feel a lot safer. Captain Kangaroo could’ve been a better leader.

    I don’t get why some folks in here get so enraged by “FIRST” ..Why give a shit? You actually log on and spend ten minutes putting together a post dedicated entirely to yelling at someone for doing something so unremarkable?.. Put your hands in the air and step AWAY from the second pot of coffee!!!

  19. Double A

    I never comment on these, but whoever wrote the commentary did an awesome job! It is hysterical!!!

  20. jrzmommy

    What’s my grandad doing up there??!!

  21. TS

    #21, not THAT was original. Cracked my shit up Steph.

    And Bonzo, act your age. We have a hard time believing that you’re only 15. You’re probably a 25 year old stoner STILL saying 420. I smoke Chronic every day and I stopped saying that shit about 10 years ago because it’s lame-ass.

    And if you hate this “cuntry” so much, WHY THE FUCK DON”T YOU LEAVE THEN? Everyone hates this country so much but ytet everyone seems to want to come here too (i.e. every European and Mexican in this country) Beat it, dude. Fucking haters. We don’t want you here anyways. Bow down, fuckfaces.

  22. hollyj

    Is he touching his lip because he’s having a stroke and can’t feel anything on that side of his face?

  23. Dick Whistle

    hollyj,
    That’s just a bunch of anti-war propaganda. The American military is still the strongest, bravest, and most bad-azzed in the world. We have more than enough soldiers to protect United States soil. And, should another country decide to attack by physically invading this country, they would find a couple hundred million fighting soldiers/citizens. And don’t forget, most of those citizens are armed and dangerous.

  24. Bonzo420

    I rule — you all drooooool!

    420 bitches!!

    TS – blow me!

    Steph ride my hard cawk! veggi eat my meat flavored shit! and um Bunny Butt– your cool- im out

    HOLLA!!

  25. Cowgirl

    Fish, you didn’t have a tree in your pants when you were driving the speeder-bike did you? Now, that is a comical visual!

  26. BIG

    why all the hate for the person who is FIRST?

  27. stnin

    I live in Stockholm myself, and I think I speak for most people in my area when I say that this was quite an unfortunate event.

    Not because Bill Murray was driving drunk in the one part of the city infested with the most B-list celebrities and 18-year-olds playing with daddy’s creditcard, but because he didn’t manage to knock any of them down.

    Perhaps next time good ol’ Bill will do us all a favour and drink a bit more before he goes cruising around town. And choose a vehicle with a bit more crushing power. I hear Hummers are nice.

  28. :D

    Whats a DUI?
    It sounds like birthcontrol.

  29. veggo

    Bonzo 420, er, I mean, the new Veggi (same douchefuck)…………

    1992 called. Your brain cells are still back there.

  30. I saw this on COPS once

  31. hollyj – You are way off the mark on this one, you probably make refrigerator magnets out of any propaganda you come across.Peolple like you is what drags this country down on a daily basis, fortunatly we have people here with balls and brains that just smother you panic freaks out.
    You will be fine, we have plenty of military waiting in idle to protect your worried down trodden self.
    The middle east is by no means a wasp nest its more like flies swarming a garbage can.

    Smile and be happy that you are fortunate enough to live in the GREATEST country in the world.

  32. one-legged vet

    @75 – I appreciate the kudos to the fighting men, but I sort of hate it when people casually state that we have “more than enough” troops available. No, we don’t. It’s not a guessing game, you can count the numbers. That’s why combat tours have been doubled and tripled, without expanding the time soldiers need out of combat zones to recover. It’s gotten so bad that some soldiers getting ready to leave Iraq have literally been turned around at the airport, as last-minute extensions come down, adding 3 more months. You have no idea what that does to a soldier – the only thing you have to hold onto when trying to cope with a combat tour is the specific date when you’ll be safely out. Except for becoming a casualty, there’s nothing worse than having your tour extended at the last minute, and that’s what’s happened to thousands of soldiers. And as Bill Murray could tell you, for years in Iraq we needed a good Urban Assault Vehicle and didn’t have any.

  33. pointandlaugh

    when did bill murray turn into the Crypt Keeper? YIKES!

  34. FOX News viewer (seem to be lots here)

    (reads or hears something upsetting)

    USA! USA! USA! USA!USA! USA!USA! USA!USA! USA!USA! USA!USA! USA!

    (Shut up brain or I’ll stab you with a Q-tip!)

  35. mr sensitive

    With any luck, the next post will include pictures of Bill Murray cumming on Hayden Panettiere’s face. I think that sort of thing is pretty much her entire appeal.

  36. CNN viewer (seem to be lots here)

    American is so evil and it’s all the republican’s fault.
    How could anyone own a gun or even think about hunting an innocent animal?
    Give me more handouts from the government. I don’t like having to work.
    More abortions.
    Hillary and Obama will save us.

  37. sane-o

    somebody tell Bozo, er, Bonzo420 that his mom is coming back into the basement with a hot curling iron. Run, bonzo, run!

  38. Dick Whistle

    #88
    Now that’s funny…. sad, but funny.

  39. sane-o

    laughing at #81, veggo, you’re killin’ me today! Funnyu

  40. Bonzo420

    sane- your comment was worse then mine– LAME!

  41. p0nk

    #45 it’s 0 (zero) not a capital O, get it right. but I did think #30 was funny. so you just go ahead and keep posting as me.

    also loved the Caddyshack reference, xrist that movie was a true classic!

  42. Uncreative Copycat Republicans (seem to be lots here)

    Like GWB, you wonder, what’s a “new idea”???

    Costs of Iraq war, to date: $450 billion plu; 3,776 soldiers killed; 27,004 wounded (gov’t figures)

    Benefits of Iraq war: most recent National Intelligence Estimate (gov’t report) states that Al Qaeda is stronger, better funded, and better able to hit the U.S. than prior to the Iraq invasion.

    Yeah, Hillary’s a woman and Obama is black. That’s all you need to know. Fucking liberal democrats. (Remember to lift the sheet when you try to vote.)

  43. hollyj

    George Washington, you need spell-check. Literacy first, understanding socio-political situations within a historical perspective second.

    Yeah, having a nation of armed citizens was really helpful on 9/11. PHEW!

    This isn’t the Revolutionary War. It’s 2007. You can wipe off the shoe polish and put up the home-made bullets. A minimally-educated population of paranoid weekend-Christians with birdshot aren’t exactly up to taking on a world-wide network of terrorists funded by Saudi oil (among other things) in a world that’s 21% Muslim.

    Put THAT on your refrigerator

  44. hollyj

    PS We need a new story to post on. Bill is lame. Come on Super!!! *snap snap*

  45. Skip Smith

    So, Bill Murray drives drunk in a golf cart, and this inspires people to write essays on international relations? Yep, you people are really smart.

  46. Lil Princess

    reflexes like a tuna sandwich…. hilarious! its moments like that, that make me love the superficial.

    oh and Bill Murray is fabulous. drunk golf-cart driving is such fun! everyone should try it.

  47. veggo

    Quit with the political talk.

    Poor Bonzo 420 is still asking his bong what propaganda means.

  48. BaldAsBritney

    Last year after the bears game we stole a golf cart and drove it down the highway in an attempt to reach our hotel. Unfortunetly we got lost and ended up in the barrio where we sold said golf cart to some gang members for cab fare home. I love drunken golf carting, I really do. You go Bill.

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