“We’re going streaking!”
For reasons known only to a Macanudo and a butler who can keep a secret, Bill Clinton joined Cameron Diaz and Alex Rodriguez for dinner in Miami last night. Now, I’m not suggesting he offered A-Rod one million dollars to sleep with Cameron Diaz, but I’m also not suggesting it wasn’t really two plus a ride in Air Force One. That’s for other people to decide. People who probably caught Clinton stealing the keys again at four a.m.
OBAMA: *turns on light* Dammit, Bill!
BILL: Oh, hey there, Barry. I was, uh, just making sure your nightstand was sturdy.
OBAMA: Who is it this time?
BILL: Cameron Diaz.
OBAMA: *sighs* I want that thing filled up.
BILL: Don’t I always.
OBAMA: HA! — But, seriously, they take that shit out of my pay.