Beyonce’s head is, uh, falling apart

December 7th, 2006 // 117 Comments

I don’t know where or when this was taken, but that’s not how a human head should look. Ever. I’m assuming the wrinkling skin has to do with Beyonce’s wig or something, but it looks like she just had a lobotomy and the stitches are giving way. While posting this I’ve subconciously felt my own forehead like six times just to make sure I haven’t contracted a rare form of head-burrowing tape worm. I’ve also masturbated twice. Multi-tasking, baby.

Thanks to Alex for the tip, and for showing me just how normal my head really is.


  1. siliconsaint69

    eh, I’d still fuck her. or that thing on her head. mmmm ribbed….

  2. snapesworst

    a lobotomy is performed in the frontal lobe of the brain, and they go in through the nose, so there are no stitches…

    i’m guessing it’s from a wig and the plaster… but.. still… wouldnt you check that before going out? since you’re going to be singing and stuff?

  3. While I’m usually eagar to comment about the celebs on here, I gotta say….

    anybody who thought Beyounce’s hair was real is stupider than a Lohan.

  4. llllllllll

    Oh that’s probably some dried Crazy Glue which dripped from her extensions.

  5. she looks a bit like a klingon.

  6. JoBOO


    Quick, someone get a bucket — her brain’s about to fall out!!!


    Yesss my photoshop skills are around the world now.

  8. snapesworst

    And, not only is her hair fake, so is her whole face….

  9. nutterbutter

    looks like dried jizz

  10. It looks like veins popping out when she hits high notes.

  11. Shahlooblah

    I still can’t stop feeling my forehead to make sure i am still good.

  12. llllllllll

    The only way she would have veins that big on her head is if she were a sperm whale.

  13. Shahlooblah

    I still can’t stop feeling my forehead to make sure i am still good.

  14. jrzmommy

    I knew she was too pretty to be human!

  15. llllllllll

    It kinda looks like Brittney’s C-section

  16. Damn, #5 beat me to it! I also wondered if she was part Klingon …

    Boost your body and brain.

  17. kate

    Holy crap! Is it that important to have long straight blonde hair?

  18. Celetina

    Yeah, it’s like the part of the wig keeping it on her head has come out of place. It’s still a really disturbing effect, and about as embarrassing.

    Re: poster 7—why is your site logo essentially stolen from The Superficial’s? Hell, the name even has similar connotations. Is being original that hard?

  19. She’s a Cardassian! I knew it!

  20. There's a Surprise Inside

    It is a lace front wig. She has been wearing them for years and so has Tyra Banks. If Tyra would have had a better hair stylist (check pics of a line going across that forehead of hers on any red carpet pic and you will see what I

  21. ImaCracka

    If you could see the other side of her head… there is one on that side too…..

    It’s where Jay-Z grips her head while she blows him……..

  22. jrzmommy

    What does Lace Front Wig mean?

  23. There's a Surprise Inside

    Video of Jessica Simpson biting the big one in front of Dolly Parton.

  24. libtard

    Dear sweet bloody Jesus, is that the sign of the beast???

  25. whackjob

    you all need to get with it…

    This is not Beyonce. It’s Tom Cruise in another of his famous Mission Impossible masks.

    Why, you ask, would Tom Cruise be out pretending to BeYonce?

    Because he loves the cock, of course.

  26. oshkoshb-goshdammgosh

    Lace Front Wig is when a guy eats a girls asshole from behind while she zips up his scrotum in a zipper.

  27. nicholelibra

    Whoaa, what the fuck is that on the side of her head? It looks like so shit out of that movie The Faculty. I’m shivering just now thinking about.

  28. mbarkr

    Her head is ribbed… for my pleasure this time!

    Finally, I gets mine!

  29. BarbadoSlim

    @5, I’ve read that her breath also smells like a Klingon’s after a night of eating rancid Gagh.

    yup time to pull out the Box Set, after I shave my back.

  30. Gizmola

    Is she a fucking Chia Pet come to life?

  31. Binky

    Insiders are saying working with BK’s wig line in Austin Power’s was the inspiration for Mike Myers’ – “That’s a man Baby!”

  32. 86

    You guys fucking crack me up.

  33. ToiletDuck

    I just KNEW she was a fucking alien!!! I have been warning people for years that she is a whiny, scaly-skinned, titless, one-legged circus freak who escaped from the Planet Triskellion…

    Why don’t people believe me? If all of you are so smart, look it up in the Weekly World News, it’s next to that article about the Siamese twin pyromaniac lesbian hookers…

  34. 86

    She needs to upgrade her damned self.

  35. BarbadoSlim

    Fellow Superfishers, trolls, Romans, countrymen, I’m just going to give up, why are these people famous? Where are our Diana Rossesesss’ our, The Doors, our, Run Dmcssses our Rolling Stones (not the night of the livng dead version) our, I don’t know, ARTISTS?!?!?!?!?

  36. #20

    WTF did you write? Really. Please read that shit you wrote and tell me if you think any reader could make out WTF you are trying to say.


  37. oshkoshb-goshdammgosh

    #34 – ha ha. good one.

  38. ToiletDuck

    She looks like something Sigourney Weaver should be sparring with – the best part of that photo is she looks like she is about to go down on that microphone…

  39. ToiletDuck

    …what a cunning stunt…

  40. BarbadoSlim

    Let ME take a crack at it #36, this is what it said “I looooove Tyra Banks’ shit and I eat it for braekfast, lunch, and dinner”

    but I’m just paraphrasing…

  41. Grope For Luna

    QuchwIj yIyach! DeSwIj choptaH ‘e’ bomev !

  42. oshkoshb-goshdammgosh

    #41 – Go back to Africa.

  43. yuckyfresh

    maybe she burnt herself with her hair straightener…..

  44. Kat420

    it’s a lace front wig. the glue is fucking up because of th face she’s making. tyra wears a lace front too.

  45. #40

    Uh huh…now I see it. Thank you very much.

  46. ToiletDuck

    Looks like a brain aneurysm from trying to hit the high notes – it sometimes happens to Paris Hilton when she is going down on a really large penis, since she doesn’t have a brain so there’s nothing to get in the way…

  47. There's a Surprise Inside

    #45 – actually I copied an explanation of the problem from some other sight to hopefully make sense of what is going on with her face.

    I apologize if the use of the English language offends you in an way.

    Lo siento mucho.

  48. There's a Surprise Inside

    Aw shit – I mean “in any way”.

  49. EJ

    7, your banner looks like it was made by someone who’s been using Photoshop all of 5 minutes… and who is hoping the CLEAVAGE!!! will keep us from noticing.

  50. aurealis

    Did anyone else watch a show in the 80′s called V? Where aliens who looked like humans would peel off their skin, revealing their lizard-like appearance, and then eat their human companion? Jay-Z, the signs are glaringly obvious. Get out before she gets you!

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