Ben Stiller defends Tom Cruise

January 24th, 2008 // 188 Comments

Ben Stiller and other celebrities are defending Tom Cruise after several Scientology videos were leaked last week and an unauthorized autobiography about Tom was released. People reports:

“Imagine having a baby and people talking about it the way they did,” says Stiller. “People lose sight of the fact that Tom Cruise is actually a person. I feel for him.”

Ben Stiller has a point. I mean, Tom Cruise is a person. Who’s really an alien – trapped inside a person. That can talk to other aliens inside other persons. It all makes sense when you think about it and are really, really high.

NOTE: I reposted the FunnyOrDie spoof because, well, it’s freaking hilarious. I still can’t get over it’s Jerry O’Connell. I thought he was just a myth.


  1. Anonymous

    Uh, #149: You are obviously a troll. Run along now.

  2. steve

    “Shot Through With Tard” should be the name of a country song. Of every country song.

  3. Thsy

    Ground control to Major Tom:
    Take your protein pills and put your helmet on
    Ground control to Major Tom: Commencing countdown engine’s on

  4. wow. ben stiller truly lives in tom cruise’s ass, doesn’t he?

    i thought that was just a stupid sketch.

  5. #149 – You better run before #151, AnonymousSpamMartyr, makes you cry.

  6. Anonymous

    “I am Rich Port, and you bastards better start paying more attention to me, because I am SOMEBODY!”

    Dude, you’re worse than Twitney when it comes to attention whoring.

  7. #156 – Hi pot… my name is kettle…

    I try to keep the words as short as your attention span.

  8. Anonymous

    Rich Port, your attempts at humor are becoming increasingly more lame. Try harder, please. You are embarassing yourself.

  9. #159 – I’m rubber you’re glue…

    What can I say? You’re titillating tidbits truly tickle my tummy. Hey, just made MORE money while you were busy losing your dignity. Have you no shame???

  10. The Sampan Man

    Please…..I’ve seen dead kittens with more pizazz than Anonymouse.

  11. It’s clear to me that Anony-PUSS has a hard time moving on….he’s still here and there are two other stories posted.

  12. Anonymous

    #159: That’s better. You’re getting there. Keep it up. You’ll be doing standup real soon.

  13. woodhorse


  14. #162 – If I attempt stand up with your material, it would be legal for the crowd to as train me… or as you like to call it, Saturday night me.

  15. Anonafag, you are the epitome of failure in the entire human race, or maybe you’re just someone who likes rice.

    You don’t hold a candle to our beloved pendejo.

  16. C’mon ninj…. he CAN hold a candle to me… to light my fucking cigarette.

  17. Anonymous

    “it would be legal for the crowd to as train me.”

    Please decipher. I don’t speak moron.

  18. Scientology Is The Way

    #151, I’m sorry to cause you discomfort, but please think about what I have said.

  19. woodhorse

    Anonymous is stomping you. Just as you cannot keep a woman to save your lives, you don’t cut it here anymore. But cockninja might have some steam still.

  20. Anonymous

    #168: OK, I’ve thought about it. Can I speak with the aliens now, or will that cost more?

  21. #169 – Shut it, wally.

    We know you speak moron, Anonymous… well you cut and paste it 150 times a fucking day.

  22. oshinko

    apologies if anyone else has already brought this up, but the rather hypocritical mr. stiller himself mercilessly spoofed tom on SNL’s celebrity jeopardy. in conclusion, they’re both retarded.

  23. lilkutie

    #7 – you took the words right out of my mouth!

  24. lisa

    OMG! HE IS GOOD. He is so good, its creepy!

  25. lisa

    Rich Port, stop with the hissy fits. It’s not attractive.

  26. kate

    Port_au_Princess, did you really just call us fartknockers?

  27. kate

    Port_au_Princess, did you really just call us fartknockers?

  28. kate

    Double comment ftw!

  29. Og

    Now thats some Kush-Lash.

    (Jerry Maguire reference in which O’Connell plays “Kush” the #1 draft pick and sings a song called “Kush-Lash”) Ahem.

  30. makemepuke

    Is Ben Stiller the stupidist retard imaginable… about career suicide, I used to think Ben Stiller was pretty cool and funny but his support of a completely deluded, Naziesque, prick of a human being has obliterated any respect I had for the man and his comedy. Ben, your a fuckin ass kissin moron to publicly endorse Tom as some kind of victim. fuck I hate actors..flakey self absorbed manipulative pricks the lot of them.

  31. Great… The Anonymous Walrus fucked everything up… again.



    I see that agents of scientology are trying to censor my posts! Good luck fags! I am the galactic leader and you will soon bow before my ass!

    My DC-8 space plane does Warp 9 and I’m coming to Earth. And when I arrive I will spread the truth about my galactic presidency.

    P.S. L Ron licked to lick hairy balls. Sick, I know, but he begged for it on his sea org ship.

    I AM XENU!

  33. As crazy as Scientology is, is any religion any better?

  34. FRT

    Opps! Looks like they got to Ben Stiller too! Too bad…all his brains have been sucked out of his head and replaced with 75 million year old alien space goo!

    Next comes the Xenu-Vacuum to clean out all of his life’s savings.
    But hey…you’ll get a ride on the “Big Ship” Ben!

  35. Required Name

    Wait, so Ben Stiller’s crazy too? Aww, man… actually, I never really cared for him. Oh well. Just another example of why celebrities have no business being on the internet.

  36. grots

    Feel sorry for him. Are you kidding Ben? How about you let Tom teach your kid there is no God and they should worship L.R.H. instead, and while your at it why don’t you just help him pass out the pamplets to innocent children luring them away from God and into the insane world of this so called church he calls scientology. Maybe he has already recruited you.

  37. Scientologists cease to be people shortly after losing their reactive mind. They are so Tone 40 that they cannot respond as a person. They respond as a scientologist, and only end up “Handling” people as opposed to interacting with them.

  38. like it ,Your blog is so good

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