Ben Stiller defends Tom Cruise

January 24th, 2008 // 188 Comments

Ben Stiller and other celebrities are defending Tom Cruise after several Scientology videos were leaked last week and an unauthorized autobiography about Tom was released. People reports:

“Imagine having a baby and people talking about it the way they did,” says Stiller. “People lose sight of the fact that Tom Cruise is actually a person. I feel for him.”

Ben Stiller has a point. I mean, Tom Cruise is a person. Who’s really an alien – trapped inside a person. That can talk to other aliens inside other persons. It all makes sense when you think about it and are really, really high.

NOTE: I reposted the FunnyOrDie spoof because, well, it’s freaking hilarious. I still can’t get over it’s Jerry O’Connell. I thought he was just a myth.


  1. Superman


  2. That is great. It is spooky how much he looks and acts like Tom Cruise….

  3. I admire Tom Cruise too. Scientology is a sound religion based on many truths of the universe. Just because it is too intricate for you fartknockers to understand…..

  4. BaconMessiah

    When Ben Stiller speaks, people listen.

  5. Who let in all the retards?

  6. And by retards, I mean BaconMessiah.

  7. digitaldevil

    Piss on Ben Stiller.

    Jerry is my new hero!

  8. FCS

    What he really meant to say is “I know my father is funnier than me and most of my movies blow, but so what because Tom Cruise is gay.”

    Just have to read between the lines, that’s all

  9. meh

    Tom Cruise a human…ha! That makes me giggle. That video was hilarious and I wish these damn celebrities would realize that the only reason people talk about them so much is because they’re crazy. The less crazy they are, the less we laugh at them. Tom Cruise is a crazy and his wife is a crazy by default. Poor girl…so young…oh well. I like to laugh.

  10. ??

    It’s Adam Sandler, if you read…not Ben Stiller…

  11. BACON Messiah you need to be hooked up to the E-Meter.

  12. Tits McCholo

    Did anyone see the Tom Cruise romp of insanity? That dude is batshit crazy as it comes. he makes brit-brit look normal, yall!

  13. Patrick

    Tom Cruise is not a person, he is an alien.

  14. Jennifer

    I am just a bit curious…His profile was found on millionaire dating site ‘’ last week.

  15. Tom Cruise… a person?!?
    Isnt he an alien or something?!? :)

  16. Papahotnuts

    Tom Cruise once forcibly gave me a blowjob in a Pizza Hut bathroom. Then he bought me a delicious slice of pepperoni and all was forgiven. He always gets me when he bats those “Scientology” eyes at me. It makes me forget about the man-rape he just performed on me.

  17. Jen

    O’Connell’s got TC’s laugh down to a perfect science….

    If faggy Timberlake’s “Dick in a Box” video can win an EMMY…This video deserves 10.

  18. germangirl

    adam sandler or ben stiller,isnt that the same. tom cruise
    is scary and obsessed as hell.

  19. Biff

    It’d be hilarious if Jake Gyllenhaal was suddenly found dead and that story trumped Jerry O’Connell, again.

  20. #16 Yes Papa, you see, the supernatural integrity of the universe is preserved in an eternal way by such unions. Tom has a higher way of thinking than most people.

  21. elocin277

    I love that people are surprised that Jerry O’Connell did this video. It makes perfect sense to me, he has the least to lose! You can’t screw up a career if you don’t have one.

  22. Cindy

    “hen he bought me a delicious slice of pepperoni” I’m sure that’s code. But reciprocity should always be appreciated during sexual encounters.

  23. D. Richards

    What does ugly Suri have to do with the video highlighting Tom Cruise’s insanity?

  24. DaniBoBani

    L. Ron Hubbard, a *fictional* author, developed Scientology :-) That’s enough for me to sign up, but wait, there is that other one by Joe Smith and his magic mushrooms… decisions, decisions…

  25. No more Britney Shitney Please

    he’s not so much a person as an enturbated theta that needs to be cleared through engrams. yeah, and donations of his personal fortune to the pyramid scheme *cough* scientology leader. oh xenu, why?

  26. Auntie Kryst

    Does anyone ever ask WWBSD? Who was the asshole that asked for Ben Stiller’s opinion (on anything) in the first place? Hey Joke man, less talky more funny.

  27. Tom Cruise will SAVE THIS NATION!! One prepubescent runaway boy at a time.

  28. BaconMessiah

    Lady Jane why so bitter? it’s not my fault your food stamps ran out.

  29. Guy

    I liked Ben Stiller in Zoolander.

    After reading that comment it makes me think he wasn’t acting in Zoolander, thats the real deal Ben Stiller.

  30. lipelicious

    leave tom alone, MI1-3 rules!

  31. BaconMessiah, and it’s not MY fault that you were born with a dick AND a twat.

  32. How does one type when jerking off with bacon grease?

  33. Papahotnuts

    Tom Cruise should jump off a Ledger and die.

  34. #31, Lipalicious… are you for fucking real? Even Heath Ledger could act better in the Mission Impossibles, even if shooting started next month.

  35. Awesome, Janey! Now BaconM can go FUCK HIMSELF.

  36. @33 – I think there must be saran wrap involved.

  37. Tom Cruise could jump off a curb to commit suicide.

  38. Uh Oh someone is playing with words...

    Is it you number 34? Hmmmm?

  39. deaconjones

    WOW…Where’s Jerry been for the past 10 years, besides cheesy original SCi-Fi channel movies??

    Isn t he married to Rebecca Romaine (spelling) God I would damage her

  40. @39 – your such a collossal douche this whole place smells like Summer Rain.

  41. Benz

    I just lost all respect for Ben Stiller, and any other celeb that defends the midget Cruise.

    But Jerry O’connell on the other hand, I gave him props since Stand By Me.

  42. She’s not a fucking salad ingredient, deaconjones.

  43. People, People!
    Settle, settle… NOW! Tom Cruise is a lovely fellow! Full of zip and vigor!!! This Jerry McDonalds seems harsh and soooo uncouth. How Tacky!

  44. #38 You miss are a funny young lady.! Kudos to you!!!

  45. Deacon Jones thinks women buy their panties at “Vidalia’s Secret”

  46. BaconMessiah

    Wow Lady Jane that was a good one. Someone write that for you? The term is Hemaphrodite BTW, you should remember that I’m sure it will come in handy for you someday soon..

    #41 classic

  47. fergernauster

    I only really come here for the weekly Tom Cruise beatings.


  48. p0nk

    xrist, it’s a freakin’ Ferret reunion in here this morning.

  49. lipelicious

    35. pinky_nip – dude you gotta admit those motorcycles on M2 were sweet! dont haaaaate!

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