Apparently Ben Affleck Is Rain Man

May 5th, 2014 // 18 Comments
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“Holy shit, is that a K-Maht? Definitely gotta go to K-Maht and get mah undaweah.”

Because the key, and often overlooked, component to getting into character as Batman is gambling, lots and lots of gambling, Ben Affleck was politely removed from the blackjack table at the Hard Rock Hotel & Casino last week after he was caught counting cards. Or “winning” in normal people talk. TMZ reports:

According to sources, security informed Affleck he had been deemed an “advantaged player” and was no longer allowed to play blackjack at the Hard Rock. We’re told security had spotted Affleck counting cards … a gambling strategy that involves counting card values to decrease betting risk.
Counting cards isn’t technically illegal, but it can get you kicked out of a casino — which is exactly what happened to Affleck. We’re told security arranged for a car service to take him back to his hotel.

As for why the hell Ben Affleck would take his wife on a romantic getaway only to gamble the entire time, Lainey Gossip has some historical evidence to take into account. As for me, I’m sticking with autism. Batman has autism. Notice how everything has to have a freakin’ bat on it? Classic autism.

Photo: Splash News


  1. Cock Dr

    This story truly shocked me. Apparently Ben Affleck is good with numbers.

    • At first I assumed had help – an electronic device and/or a real brain behind the scenes.
      However, reports suggest that he was brazenly obvious i his cahd-counting methods, so maybe he is good at simple mental arithmetic.

  2. “I’m sorry, sir, but since you’re not losing money hand over fist, you’re no longer welcome.”

    Sounds like most casinos I know.

  3. Is Jennifer Garner pregnant again? She needs to start swallowing.

  4. david(guest)

    i counted cards once. i got 52.

  5. JC

    “Jennifuh lets me drive the cah slow on the driveway every Saturday.”

  6. FruitLoop

    Whelp, there’s yer new Batman. Someone who’s supposed to be the pinnacle of the human condition. Could he be bothered to work out, like, a little bit?

  7. cajunhawk

    Sounds like a planted story to me…Ben Affleck is cooler than you…and smarter…accept him as Batman. Fuck Affleck…Argo sucked.

  8. Maybe he should have got the job as a janitor at Harvard.

  9. Busted for counting cards, huh? I guess it’s a good thing he wasn’t scoping out tits or they might have shot him.

  10. In this pic he has bigger boobs than she does.

  11. Robb7

    He’s won a shitload of money over the years. Not like he needs it. I guess he traded his drinking addiction for cards.

  12. Lose your life savings and nobody bats an eye…

    Win too much and everyone loses their minds

  13. right

    Those Casinos weren’t built on allowing people to win. Normally when you win counting cards, you end up in a hole in the desert. Typical star treatment, they called the car service for him.

  14. NJRainMan

    i kaan cownt to 10. How about dem apples?

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