Avril Lavigne spits on paparazzi

September 29th, 2006 // 149 Comments

Just in case you didn’t already want to punch Avril Lavigne in the face, she was caught two times in the past two nights acting like a douchebag and spitting on the paparazzi.

After celebrating her 22nd birthday at Hyde, the wannabe punk-rocker unleashed a torrent of “f*** yous” to the paparazzi and autograph seekers, even signing the pleasant greeting on some pictures. Avril and her entourage then made their way to the safety of their SUV, where she rolled the window down and loaded up a liquid projectile in her mouth. Moments later, she displayed her masterful sharpspitting skills by hitting one photographer in the face while laughing hysterically and screaming, “bitch!”

And proving that dumbassery is contagious, her husband Deryck Whibley joined in the spitting frenzy and hit a photographer in the glasses with a loogie last night at the grand opening of Area nightclub in Hollywood. Make sure you’re alone when you watch the video because I gaurantee afterwards you’ll be filled with a lust to murder. And God forbid there are any infants around, because the sound of her voice will drive you to punch them.

NOTE: Free Slurpee to anybody who gets the reference.


  1. Madrid Marriott

    Angry Canadians.

  2. When are they going to be arrested? Why does this go on?

  3. Hahah she looks like she can be a real b*tch.

  4. jrzmommy

    If ya don’t want fame, don’t go looking for it.

    The retelling of this makes me think of the scene in Ace Ventura II where he and the tribal elder dude come out of the tent saturated in spit. Maybe expectorating upon each other is a little known Canadian custom???

  5. Wampoon.com

    It’s quite sexy actually.


  6. Woman or not, I would have punched her right in her cocksucker!!!!!!!!!!!

  7. No it is not a Canadian thing to hork’ on others thank you.

    She is a snot noze with a huge ego. A nice backhand from a WWE Diva would dummy her up real quick. :-)

  8. Ryanwiz

    Dane Cook

  9. combustion8

    I’d grudge fuck her right in front of her dweeb of a man for a husband.

  10. Equalparts

    Yes, because Avril is just soooooooo busy in her career as a celebrity that she can afford to be rude to her fans and the public.

    Married at 21 years old to a troll with a lispy singing voice. This girl never was, nor ever will be a “punk rocker”. If she went with me to a true punk rock show, she’d piss her pants and get on her diamond encrusted cell phone to call Vera Wang exclaiming, “Will you make me some eggs and baccy?”

  11. Glossed Over

    That’s by far the most punk-rock thing she’s ever done. Congrats, Avril! Now you’re only 98% fake!


  12. Stirlang923

    Mr. Dane Cook

    WHere’s my slurpee…just kidding

  13. BriBri

    What a useless cuntrag. Who the hell does she think she is? She’s acting like she’s some big star, fuck her. No one likes her pseudo-punk crap anyway, except jr. high school girls who think she expresses their upper-middle class angst and oppression. Blah! She needs to find a good hole of obscurity to disappear into.

    I, for one, would have put my fist through her fucking rat face. (Come on, we know she looks like a rat.)

    And if she didn’t want the papparazi that comes with the fame she can fork over her millions and move into a trailer somewhere, fucktard.

  14. JD

    reference = dane cook

    “god help me, it’s the sound that makes me want to punch infants!”

  15. cavanaugh

    hahaahh I hate her even more now

    It’s a damn cold night

  16. obviously, she’s been hanging with caMORON diaz lately and apparently blowing loogies on paparazzi is a cureall for major acne cysts..

  17. Ruby

    Little spoiled bitch. She needs a sound spanking with a horsewhip. You’re grounded!

  18. jrzmommy


  19. RichPort

    She looks like a fucking elf. Good thing she keeps the pointy ears tucked under that mop. If she hates the photogs so much she can always move back to our 51st state. That’s Canada of course. Isn’t it, eh? What the hell is that aboot?

  20. RichPort

    #18 – That puts him close to the lead in the race to the bottom of humanity, a spot currently held in a tie by Paris the molester Hilton, Dick Cheney, and Osama Bin Hidin’.

  21. Ruby

    #18 but he ain’t done got no money! hic.

  22. DancingQueen

    If she doesn’t want the press following her around maybe she should keep her dumb ass in Canada where I’m sure nobody gives two shits about her. Why is she hanging out in Hollywood clubs if she doesn’t want to be seen? Dumb bitch.

  23. combustion8

    Every ratzi should take turns spitting in a bucket and throw it on her all at once… priceless.

  24. That’s so punk and anarchist of her. I am not impressed. What would be more impressive if a celeb was actually genuine. Unlike many who are all about posing and trying to look flawless. I would love to see more celebs looking humble yet confident. That would be rebelling against the system!


  25. hamacus

    Actually, I like it when they spit on it….oh-oh…TMI

  26. Assault with battery. Judges take a very dim view of spitting battery, particularly with respect to communicable diseases. A and D may well find themselves giving up some blood for a full screen.

    Nobody is going to jail, but some cash will change hands.

  27. I always figured her for a non-swallower


  28. hamacus

    Slurpee’s are great! I like the drinks too.

  29. Xopher.tm

    No one gives two shits about her in the US either.

    Someone off the cunt and make her interesting quick.

  30. This is a Rock 'n Roll Takeover

    That would be Dane Cook! “IT’S THE SOUND THAT MAKES ME PUNCH INFANTS!!!”

    and P.S. I really want to challenge both of those shifty Canadians to a fight. I’ve met Derek and he was THE WORLD’S BIGGEST DOUCHE BAG!!! And as for Avril, if I ever hear her claiming to be punk again…I swear to God I’m going to shoot her in the face with a nail gun. That bitch didn’t even know who the Sex Pistols were.



  32. there’s so much intensity in her “fuck you”s… I’m lost in admiration at her… 22 and saying “fuck you” with that little bitch’s deep tone… wow. for you Avril: fuck-you. why isn’t it working???? *disappointment*

  33. fucking classy

    What makes me really fucking pissed is that that talentless little cunt probably makes more money than all of us… and thinks she

  34. You can hear her proudly tell the others in the car that she wrote “Fuck You” on her fan’s photos. Wow. The “Fuck You” is going to be on Avril when masculine hubby Deryk gets a fan impregnated during a Sum 41 fair tour. Watching life suck the spunk out of this cunt is going to be pleasant. She’s no Madonna, she can’t even get an audience with a lesser devil to sell her useless soul (not that they would want the meager thing), and her career has the longevity of a David Gest erection.

  35. biatcho

    she won’t be too happy when all her little fans grow up & realize what a fake hack she is. This Canadian pig’s 15 mins are up… why in god’s name should she be pissed at the paparazzi? She should be happy someone still wants a picture of a diseased rat in prada.

  36. sjb16

    She’s an ugly little snaggle-toothed troll, isn’t she? Avril needs to put on her big-girl undies today, and then prepare for me to get a running start when I punch her in the face.

  37. Jay from the Bay

    Avril is a talentless, rank cunt who needs to be kicked in the neck by someone wearing golf cleats. I could just simply do without her. Is her “husband” a woman?

  38. jrzmommy

    they look like the dirty skanky couple in junior high school who were ALWAYS engaged in PDA, carved their names in their arms with broken glass, she’d get upset when he got his ass beat by the jocks. Class acts.

  39. Tabroid

    Sorry to buck the trend, but I think it’s pretty fucking hilarious that she spit on one of the photo-leeches. I don’t give a shit about Avril Lavigne, but I don’t give a shit about the paparazzi either. They’re good company and spitting on each other seems to fit their pointless existence. I’m hoping that poop throwing will soon follow. Then, maybe ritual sacrifice or a mass suicide pact.

  40. Is it plagerism if I steal a quote from my own site? I hope not:

    “Are you fucking kidding me?”

    That is an actual quote from me, to whoever was within earshot, the first time I heard the verbal bile from this little turd referred to as “Punk Rock.” You know what Punk is? Punk is drinking alcohol from unlabeled bottles in a club in the middle of the city, the club that has no sign or name on the door. Punk is telling the establishment to lick your balls, then actually whipping them out on stage. Punk is the Sex Pistols, the Revolting Cocks, Too Drunk To Fuck, The Clash, and Ebba Groin.

    Punk IS NOT some 16 year-old girl from Canada that wears her dad’s ties and sings about Skating and going to the mall. Holy Crap! Every time I see a little tweenie in the mall wearing a Ramones shirt I want to yell like a crazed weasel “Take off the goddamn shirt, you haven’t earned the right to be a punk, damnit!” Thank god for mall security and lithium.

  41. PS – This article should be called:

    “Avril Lavigne Spits on American Music.”

  42. ScarletDove

    I’d suggest a boycott on her, but, ummmm… what was her last hit? Sk8er Boi??? She needs to learn how to spit on herself and her career!

  43. RichPort

    The Wu Tang Clan is more punk than this idiot.

  44. spatz

    if you dont want to be photographed dont go to fucking club hyde! is this the only club in all the land?? go somewhere else and you wont get photographed. if i were the paparzzi i’d smash her face in with my big camera lens.
    i’d really love to kick her square in her vagina. yup, right in the baby maker. and i’d like to kick her “husband” right in his vagina too

  45. poppy

    Ok – I never post, but jrzmommy really cracked me up!

  46. byronebyronian

    Either he is rubbing off on her or the Christian homeschool upbringing is making her think she’s some kind of loogy spitting rebel.

    Me thinks this is proof that homeschooling christian right crap makes kids into ungrateful twats.

  47. byronebyronian

    Either he is rubbing off on her or the Christian homeschool upbringing is making her think she’s some kind of loogy spitting rebel.

    Me thinks this is proof that homeschooling christian right crap makes kids into ungrateful twats.

  48. byronebyronian

    Either he is rubbing off on her or the Christian homeschool upbringing is making her think she’s some kind of loogy spitting rebel.

    Me thinks this is proof that homeschooling christian right crap makes kids into ungrateful twats.

  49. Mo

    Overpaid “singer” + spitting + video of it = a big payout. What a dumbass. I hope that skank has to pay big time.

  50. jrzmommy

    When I think of punk I think of the Sex Pistols, the Dead Kennedys, Avril Lavigne—–wait! How’d she get in there??

    How about, Punk–Jello Biafra and Johnny Rotten…. a snot-nosed little bitch-assed punk…..Avril Lavigibonfibndfo whatever her goddammed name is.

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