Oh Shit! A Movie Trailer Double Feature Post!

Who says I can’t have a post to discuss two equally ‘meh’ trailers for movies that I don’t care about? The new Avengers: Infinity War trailer came out today almost simultaneously with the recut trailer for All the Money in the World so let’s just hit two birds with one stone, shall we?

First we have the trailer for the franchise that DC wished they had, Avengers: Infinity War. For what it is, I think it looks like a pretty fun movie. Will it impact social change and have people thinking differently about the meaning of life? Probably not… but it will be kind of cool to see Thanos rock the shit out of Spiderman (who got an Ironman hardware upgrade to his suit or something). Black Panther looks fucking badass and Captain America has an edgy new beard because he probably discovered espresso at some point between now and the last flick.

As far as popcorn movies go, the only movie I see giving Avengers a run for its money is Rampage. Don’t ask my why. I just feel it will be the CGI/blow shit up dark horse of 2018 and I think you should get in on it now. Rampage will be the bitcoin of 2018. You heard it here first.

Next we have the hastily (and clumsily) recut of All the Money in the World sans Kevin Spacey. It looks like they put this together in about twenty minutes which is nineteen minutes longer than it takes me to eat three hot dogs. Although I’ve seen the previous trailer (which was kind of awesome) and am familiar with what goes on, the quick cuts left me out of breath and completely taken out of the story.  Really the only purpose that this trailer serves is to remind people that Sony cleansed 100% of Spacey’s stink out it in a matter of weeks. Christopher Plummer, who doesn’t need prosthetics to look old, gets more screen time in this trailer than Marky Mark so that should also say something.

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