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Is this supposed to be in poem form, or is my display screwed up? Either way, I think we’ve found my generation’s Odyssey.

Posted on Jan 3rd
re: The Best of The Crap We Missed 2013 (10 comments)

As the Russian President does everything he can to eradicate homosexuals, two men put everything on the line for love.

Coming this fall, on Lifetime: Putin Up the Good Fight

Oh hey Joe, I see you are not familiar with employment law in this country. Let me give you the world’s most depressing crash course. Let’s pretend you and I work for an NFL team. You are gay, and I am a big supporter of your right to be gay. Sadly, under federal law, neither of us get any protection. Our boss could call us into the office and say “You are both the best employees I have, but I hate the gays and people who like gays, so you are fired.” Neither of us would have any legal recourse. Now, if he said “I hate men” “I hate jews” or even “I hate the gays who don’t act manly enough” then you got a lawsuit.

Some states protect LGBT status, and some cities within some states (for example, firing an employee for being gay is a no-no within Philadelphia’s city limits. The rest of Pennsatucky is fine with it).

But you are right, that illegal alien (who passed a bar exam I’m pretty sure you couldn’t figure out how to apply for much less pass) could totally win the case – assuming he represented the NFL.

Mark, sadly, in most states, there isn’t an issue even if you are fired just for being gay. It is never a constitutional issue, but in some states (and some cities within states – Philadelphia for example) there are statutes barring against discrimination in the workplace based on LGBT status. A bill was introduced recently to pass a federal version of this, but as the law now stands, there are plenty of places your boss could legally fire you for being great at your job, but gay.

Posted on Nov 20th, 2013
re: 'Please, Just Let Me Walk To My Car With My Tits And My Baby' (17 comments)

“Is mommy’s little girl going to get pissed on for money some day? Yes you are.”

Posted on Jul 12th, 2013
re: The Crap We Missed - Friday 7.12.13 (10 comments)

I’m not a medical doctor, but that sure looks like arm herpes to me…

Posted on Jul 12th, 2013
re: The Crap We Missed - Friday 7.12.13 (17 comments)

Sometimes I like to picture baby Jesus up in heaven thinking, “Yes, when I said ‘come, follow me,’ graphic t-shirts and giant trashy crucifix tattoos are exactly what I had in mind.”

Posted on Jul 12th, 2013
re: The Crap We Missed - Friday 7.12.13 (32 comments)

They’ve already started filming on Sharknado 2? Eh, good for Tara, she needs the work.

Posted on Dec 14th, 2012
re: Kristen Stewart at a Screening of 'On The Road' (5 comments)

You know it’s bad when even the chick in the background disapproves.

Posted on Nov 13th, 2012
re: The Crap We Missed - Tuesday 11.13.12 (29 comments)

He is using this as his headshot when he tries out to be the next voice of Elmo.