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Posted on Jan 6th, 2011
re: Oksana: 'Mel Gibson Could Only Get a Boner By Punching Me' (45 comments)

I can only get wet if I see Mel punching Oksana with the beaver hand puppet.

Posted on Dec 17th, 2010
re: Tony Romo Got Engaged (27 comments)

In other news, Jessica Simpson got engaged to a Tony Romas.

Posted on Dec 10th, 2010
re: Miley Cyrus Caught Smoking Bong (142 comments)

I can see something on the horizon. . . it looks like. . . It’s a Miley sex tape! LAND HOE!

Posted on Dec 8th, 2010
re: MTV is Just Tempting God Now (89 comments)

She looks like a big fluffy turd! Gorgeous gorgeous you filthy slam-pig, you!

Posted on Dec 8th, 2010
re: So Who Wants to Hear How Lindsay Lohan Was Conceived? (26 comments)

It probably just looked like two leather couches going at it.

Posted on Dec 7th, 2010
re: Kathy Griffin in a Bikini (I'm Sorry) (99 comments)

I hope I look that good when I’m 63.

Posted on Dec 6th, 2010
re: Chelsea Handler Hates Angelina Jolie (145 comments)

White zombie flapjack boobies. That’s the only funny thing about her.

Posted on Nov 29th, 2010
re: Jennifer Aniston Was in a Bikini (42 comments)

Shut your butthole.

Posted on Nov 29th, 2010
re: Jennifer Aniston Was in a Bikini (42 comments)

Even with nipples as big as gumdrops she is BORING.

Posted on Nov 22nd, 2010
re: 1122-kesha-amas-10 (7 comments)

Aaaaahhhhhhhhhhhhh! Christ. I wouldn’t fuck her with her own penis.