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Lance’s Tour de France jersey wasn’t colored yellow, it was butterscotch.

Is her chaperone the Brundlefly version of Cheech Marin and Hulk Hogan?

“Let me show you how that guy we paid off drove through that tunnel in Paris.”

“How am I going to get out without the world seeing my cunt?” or “How’s the best way to get out to show the world my cunt?”

I’m Rich Bitch! *honk honk*

She has more asses than a Chinese phonebook.

I present to you the combination of the best of two generations in one body: Pee-Wee Herman and Bela Legosi!

She’ll never get work in the bukkake industry.

“Ms. Gibson, your stomach is ripped.”
“Thank you.”
“No, I’m saying your stomach is fucking ripped!”

And in the background, the world’s gayest Mexican.