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On it.

So if I understand you correctly, Sony wants me to kill James Franco in the name of free speech and make it look like an accident?

He should have spent less time watching “7th Heaven” reruns and more time watching “My Name is Earl.”

Posted on Dec 18th
re: The Crap We Missed - Thursday 12.18.14 (5 comments)

That must be how it looks from the strip club stage when a tit man sits next to a leg man.

Posted on Dec 18th
re: The Crap We Missed - Thursday 12.18.14 (16 comments)

Is there a Madame Tussaud’s in NYC?

Posted on Dec 18th
re: The Crap We Missed - Thursday 12.18.14 (29 comments)

I guess that pic was taken from the stern of a skanktrawler.

So you think *you* had an icky day, Madge? What about me? I woke up sick— groggy as girl at Bill Cosby’s. On the way in to work, some terrorist cut me off in traffic, and because another unit had an early meeting, I was gang-raped out of the chocolate-covered donuts in the break room! I had to make do with two of those cinnamon sugar ones. Andersonville rations, if you ask me! On top of it all, just before lunch, my boss “Adolf” asked me to write a memo. Auschwitzed to my desk, while everybody else gets to go out and finish their Christmas shopping! Now I’ll have to go tomorrow night. The malls’ll be packed like a slave ship!

“I’ll be nice, Kim Jong-Un, please don’t release my browser history, I’ll be nice, Kim Jong-Un, please don’t release my browser history, I’ll be nice, Kim Jong-Un, please don’t release my browser history.”
–every Sony official

Depends how long we wait.

Posted on Dec 17th
re: The Crap We Missed - Wednesday 12.17.14 (11 comments)

I’m going to print out that picture and paste into my dictionary next to “sashay.”