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Posted on Nov 20th, 2012
re: Brett Ratner Banged Olivia Munn (85 comments)

Article should have been titled: What celebrity douche hasn’t fucked Olivia (Lisa) Munn?

Ratner’s uncensored recollections:
“The far-too-intimate details of her early days as a prostitute rented short term by a bigwig Hollywood douche are amongst many tales she recalled from her early prostitution days in Hollywood. Details such as servicing, “a grown man in an oversized shirt holding his undersized manhood in hands glistening with shrimp fat.”
On Thursday, Ratner came clean, saying that he was that bigwig director, but denied ever having such glistening hands.
“I used to rent Olivia Munn, I’ll be honest with everyone here. But when she was ‘Lisa,’ before needing to change her name, look and background, like most up and coming pornstar/hookers do early in their career after being recognized. She wasn’t Asian back then,” he said. “She was peddling her wares(whoring) on my set of ‘After the Sunset,’ I rented her a few times, but I forgot her. Because she changed her name. I didn’t know it was the same prostitute and so when she whored for me for a TV show, I forgot her, she got pissed off, and so she made up all these stories about me eating shrimp and masturbating in my trailer. And she talked about my shortcomings.”

“The Misadventures of a Hollywood Geek”
A geek indeed.
Actual geeks are not physically desirable enough
to have countless douchebags vying to be the next
number in a long and busy line serviced.