Audrina Patridge makes $10K just to drink at a bar

In a giant “Fuck you!” to me from the universe, I’ve learned that Audrina Patridge of MTV’s The Hills gets paid $10,000 just to show up at clubs and drink. Nobody ever pays me to drink. Though somebody once tried to pay me not to drink. I told them to take their million bucks and scram. NY Daily News reports:

Not only does the contract require the $10k she earned, it also promises that Patridge and her entourage will be well taken care of. The Maxim model, 23, demands “a secure VIP area with complimentary beer, mixed drinks and bottle service (two bottles) and at least one security guard at all times,” according to the rider.

If somebody shows up a club screaming “Oh my God, I have to get in! Audrina Patridge is here!”, I think the bouncers should legally be allowed to sterilize that person. I dunno, that’s just me. Call me crazy, but I’d like to see the human race survive and not be snuffed out in a “poof” of fake tits, lattes and vapid assclowns. Unless that “poof” is the sound of an H-bomb hitting Spencer Pratt in the neck.