Audrina Patridge uses her fake breasts to promote drinking (Folks, I think I’m love)

September 30th, 2008 // 120 Comments

Audrina Patridge hosted an event for Bombay Sapphire in Vegas over the weekend proving she’s the only pure and decent thing to come out of The Hills. Audrina grasps the concept that nobody wants to hear her talk. Ever. Not even if the sound of her voice is the antidote for cancer. Just smile, wear a bikini then wait for your fleeting relevancy to be replaced by the next 21-year-old with implants who’s banging an MTV producer. Audrina Patridge, we salute you! Keep on truckin’!

Thanks to Marcine for knowing the key to my heart: Gin.


  1. ph7

    There is nothing fake about the woody in my pants right now!

  2. madu

    Seroiusly? First? sweet!
    The boobs are lookin a bit grandma’ish

  3. Hmmmm..

    They look kinda saggy to be fake……

  4. Hmmmm..

    They look kinda saggy to be fake……

  5. M

    If her boobs are fake, they look good.

  6. Reyce

    Yikes, thats some yucky cleavage…

  7. Flip

    Umm, yeah those tits are hella ugly… that’s what she gets for going to a cheap surgeon. Who is this bitch anyway?

  8. They are real on the outside and that is all that counts for me..

  9. My apple bags sags like that,,,2 heavy full things pulling and stretching the skin…and the emaciated look does’nt help,,,

  10. Binky

    Whenever I see that pic of Queen Victoria on the bottle of Bombay Saph – a little voice in my head says – ‘Shiiiiit….When did they invent makeup’ ?
    Or was the pic depicting her after embalming…? Not that I’m against the natural look…
    The booze is good though…

  11. Sledman

    Wow, that’s one shapeless woman. Not sure if she has no curves or its just that unflattering bathing suit she has on. Also, yeah I agree, ugly cleavage. Shouldn’t implants prevent saggy tits?

  12. eww

    Yeah, the cleavage is pretty scary. What a waste, she’s an attractive girl, but her boobs are just too big for her body. Saggy implants are not flattering.

  13. havoc


    Bombay Sapphire is good stuff too…..


  14. CaptainMorgan

    National Geographic.

    ’nuff said.

  15. Whoa! Those are some majorly saggy grandma breasts. The nips point toward the fucking pavement. It’s a good thing she’s wearing the sunglasses. That way we don’t have to see he dead, vacant look in her eyes. No one wants to see the horrifying look of monstrous stupidity, and massive brain damage staring back at them.

  16. Her parents must be proud.

  17. yeah

    Wow she has really great teeth. I hope they aren’t as fake as her boobs.

  18. I am Indian so I must wear a red dot on my forehead and stampede because its in my blood

    Not bad for a 38 year old mother of four.

  19. Jake

    Wow, this chick so hot, she’s giving me a… a… oh… oh… OH… sppppth… sppppppth… SSPPPPPPTHHHH… *brrrrrrrraaaaaappppp* sppppth….yes, a fartgasm.

  20. Anonymous

    I fail to see what the big deal is about this chick. At least we’re not looking at her funky eyes.

  21. editrix

    You think those hangin silcone sacks look good? On a 21-year-old? Ish.

  22. Jakkie

    ja ja ja was ist los was ist das.

  23. momi amtesh

    i am love the breast of these lady and want marry her,she am live in house with me and goat

  24. Master Shake

    “then wait for your fleeting relevancy to be replaced by the next 21-year-old with implants whose banging an MTV producer”

    whose – possessive form of “who”

    who’s – contraction of “who” and “is”

    The 21-year-old with implants doesn’t own the banging, she is banging. Someone who writes for a living should know that.

  25. Lisa

    Huge fake boobs stuck on a bony pigeon-chest is never sexy

  26. Rabbit

    Those are some sorry looking boobs!

  27. Rabbit

    Those are some sorry looking boobs!

  28. Rabbit

    Those are some sorry looking boobs!

  29. Mcfeely Smackup

    “M – September 30, 2008 5:31 PM

    If her boobs are fake, they look good.”

    Ever notice how you can always tell the ones who have never seen a boob? they’re the ones that see obvious fakes that look like shit, and say they don’t think they’re fake.


  30. Ted from LA

    Is it just me or does her cleavage look like a life preserver vest ? It looks like you could just stick your head in between them and wrap the tits over your chest. If you get bored, you could just turn your head around and motorboat.

  31. Look at pics 4 – 7.. I want to see more of the chick in pink with bigger fake boobs and the thong. What is wrong with that camera dude.

  32. yukmouff

    “I wish i had more hands…..”

    *you know the rest!!

  33. ultradev

    Nevermind her … check out pic 6 in the background … the ass of the blond in the pink see through skirt is fantastic!

  34. Freddo

    C’mon Fish, those tits look terrible.

    @12…you said it man, shapeless body, complete with saggy boobs that look like a pair of water balloons.

    Terrible…terrible…this post just depressed me.

  35. Danklin24

    Theres something wrong with you if you find this chicks massive deformed fake tits attractive.

  36. peckerhead

    Kissing the lipless.

  37. E. Norma Stitz

    “Folks, I think I’m love”


    Somethig is wrong with the picture when you look between the breasts and see belly. But not bad for 50 years old.

  38. Alicat

    The shadows between her breasts resemble the underside of a scrotum.

  39. can i get a hoot hoot

    Beaver teeth and wonk eyes with silicone tits. Why is she supposed to be famous?

  40. Superficial R.I.P.

    I have no idea who’s writing here anymore….but the new superficial is not funny at all. Too bad, this used to be a good gossip site.

  41. Ted from LA

    I think she is famous because she came from a famous singing family from the 1970s. I think I love you, but that’s not what I’m so afraid of, but it worries me to say, that I never felt this way. She seems fake enough to be related to a mythical TV family.

  42. A CUP

    #31…more like a neck pillow for an airplane.

    On first glance, it looks like there’s a deformed dick between her boobs. And guess what kind of necklace she’s wearing???

  43. WOAH

    I thought you said the chasm between her breasts was hosting a part for Bombay sapphire. It looks like you could nestle a bottle of it easily for storage there. Like a perfect breast cupboard for gin.

  44. Superficial R.I.P.


  45. Cody

    “Folks, I think I’m love”


  46. mrbrestguy

    Her cleavage needs to be cleaved unto itself

  47. Miss Miss

    Not that hot…at least I can’t see her funky-ass scary eyes.

  48. infinetpartners

    If she’s into A2M I might stick it.

  49. brittney gean

    kay like what the hell?? her boobs look so gross, and the men here are just as nasty and horny as her left boob

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