Audrina Patridge uses her fake breasts to promote drinking (Folks, I think I’m love)

September 30th, 2008 // 120 Comments

Audrina Patridge hosted an event for Bombay Sapphire in Vegas over the weekend proving she’s the only pure and decent thing to come out of The Hills. Audrina grasps the concept that nobody wants to hear her talk. Ever. Not even if the sound of her voice is the antidote for cancer. Just smile, wear a bikini then wait for your fleeting relevancy to be replaced by the next 21-year-old with implants who’s banging an MTV producer. Audrina Patridge, we salute you! Keep on truckin’!

Thanks to Marcine for knowing the key to my heart: Gin.

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Comments (120)

  1. ph7 | September 30, 2008 at 5:29 pm

    There is nothing fake about the woody in my pants right now!

    Reply
  2. yay | September 30, 2008 at 5:30 pm

    FIRST

    Reply
  3. madu | September 30, 2008 at 5:30 pm

    Seroiusly? First? sweet!
    The boobs are lookin a bit grandma’ish

    Reply
  4. Hmmmm.. | September 30, 2008 at 5:30 pm

    They look kinda saggy to be fake……

    Reply
  5. Hmmmm.. | September 30, 2008 at 5:31 pm

    They look kinda saggy to be fake……

    Reply
  6. M | September 30, 2008 at 5:31 pm

    If her boobs are fake, they look good.

    Reply
  7. Reyce | September 30, 2008 at 5:31 pm

    Yikes, thats some yucky cleavage…

    Reply
  8. Flip | September 30, 2008 at 5:32 pm

    Umm, yeah those tits are hella ugly… that’s what she gets for going to a cheap surgeon. Who is this bitch anyway?

    Reply
  9. Jimbo | September 30, 2008 at 5:33 pm

    They are real on the outside and that is all that counts for me..

    Reply
  10. Rough Daddy | September 30, 2008 at 5:35 pm

    My apple bags sags like that,,,2 heavy full things pulling and stretching the skin…and the emaciated look does’nt help,,,

    Reply
  11. Binky | September 30, 2008 at 5:36 pm

    Whenever I see that pic of Queen Victoria on the bottle of Bombay Saph – a little voice in my head says – ‘Shiiiiit….When did they invent makeup’ ?
    Or was the pic depicting her after embalming…? Not that I’m against the natural look…
    The booze is good though…

    Reply
  12. Sledman | September 30, 2008 at 5:36 pm

    Wow, that’s one shapeless woman. Not sure if she has no curves or its just that unflattering bathing suit she has on. Also, yeah I agree, ugly cleavage. Shouldn’t implants prevent saggy tits?

    Reply
  13. eww | September 30, 2008 at 5:38 pm

    Yeah, the cleavage is pretty scary. What a waste, she’s an attractive girl, but her boobs are just too big for her body. Saggy implants are not flattering.

    Reply
  14. havoc | September 30, 2008 at 5:39 pm

    NICE….

    Bombay Sapphire is good stuff too…..

    .

    Reply
  15. CaptainMorgan | September 30, 2008 at 5:45 pm

    National Geographic.

    ’nuff said.

    Reply
  16. HorribleJudgment | September 30, 2008 at 5:48 pm

    Whoa! Those are some majorly saggy grandma breasts. The nips point toward the fucking pavement. It’s a good thing she’s wearing the sunglasses. That way we don’t have to see he dead, vacant look in her eyes. No one wants to see the horrifying look of monstrous stupidity, and massive brain damage staring back at them.

    Reply
  17. The Screaming Meat Nugget | September 30, 2008 at 5:50 pm

    Her parents must be proud.

    Reply
  18. yeah | September 30, 2008 at 5:58 pm

    Wow she has really great teeth. I hope they aren’t as fake as her boobs.

    Reply
  19. I am Indian so I must wear a red dot on my forehead and stampede because its in my blood | September 30, 2008 at 5:59 pm

    Not bad for a 38 year old mother of four.

    Reply
  20. Jake | September 30, 2008 at 6:00 pm

    Wow, this chick so hot, she’s giving me a… a… oh… oh… OH… sppppth… sppppppth… SSPPPPPPTHHHH… *brrrrrrrraaaaaappppp* sppppth….yes, a fartgasm.

    Reply
  21. Anonymous | September 30, 2008 at 6:00 pm

    I fail to see what the big deal is about this chick. At least we’re not looking at her funky eyes.

    Reply
  22. editrix | September 30, 2008 at 6:05 pm

    You think those hangin silcone sacks look good? On a 21-year-old? Ish.

    Reply
  23. Jakkie | September 30, 2008 at 6:08 pm

    ja ja ja was ist los was ist das.

    Reply
  24. momi amtesh | September 30, 2008 at 6:15 pm

    i am love the breast of these lady and want marry her,she am live in house with me and goat

    Reply
  25. Master Shake | September 30, 2008 at 6:26 pm

    “then wait for your fleeting relevancy to be replaced by the next 21-year-old with implants whose banging an MTV producer”

    whose – possessive form of “who”

    who’s – contraction of “who” and “is”

    The 21-year-old with implants doesn’t own the banging, she is banging. Someone who writes for a living should know that.

    Reply
  26. Lisa | September 30, 2008 at 6:28 pm

    Huge fake boobs stuck on a bony pigeon-chest is never sexy

    Reply
  27. Rabbit | September 30, 2008 at 6:35 pm

    Those are some sorry looking boobs!

    Reply
  28. Rabbit | September 30, 2008 at 6:35 pm

    Those are some sorry looking boobs!

    Reply
  29. Rabbit | September 30, 2008 at 6:35 pm

    Those are some sorry looking boobs!

    Reply
  30. Mcfeely Smackup | September 30, 2008 at 6:36 pm

    “M – September 30, 2008 5:31 PM

    If her boobs are fake, they look good.”

    Ever notice how you can always tell the ones who have never seen a boob? they’re the ones that see obvious fakes that look like shit, and say they don’t think they’re fake.

    FAIL

    Reply
  31. Ted from LA | September 30, 2008 at 6:40 pm

    Is it just me or does her cleavage look like a life preserver vest ? It looks like you could just stick your head in between them and wrap the tits over your chest. If you get bored, you could just turn your head around and motorboat.

    Reply
  32. Jimbo | September 30, 2008 at 6:43 pm

    Look at pics 4 – 7.. I want to see more of the chick in pink with bigger fake boobs and the thong. What is wrong with that camera dude.

    Reply
  33. yukmouff | September 30, 2008 at 6:46 pm

    “I wish i had more hands…..”

    *you know the rest!!

    Reply
  34. ultradev | September 30, 2008 at 7:06 pm

    Nevermind her … check out pic 6 in the background … the ass of the blond in the pink see through skirt is fantastic!

    Reply
  35. Freddo | September 30, 2008 at 7:09 pm

    C’mon Fish, those tits look terrible.

    @12…you said it man, shapeless body, complete with saggy boobs that look like a pair of water balloons.

    Terrible…terrible…this post just depressed me.

    Reply
  36. Danklin24 | September 30, 2008 at 7:11 pm

    Theres something wrong with you if you find this chicks massive deformed fake tits attractive.

    Reply
  37. peckerhead | September 30, 2008 at 7:17 pm

    Kissing the lipless.

    Reply
  38. E. Norma Stitz | September 30, 2008 at 7:18 pm

    “Folks, I think I’m love”

    Classic!

    Somethig is wrong with the picture when you look between the breasts and see belly. But not bad for 50 years old.

    Reply
  39. Alicat | September 30, 2008 at 7:21 pm

    The shadows between her breasts resemble the underside of a scrotum.

    Reply
  40. can i get a hoot hoot | September 30, 2008 at 7:32 pm

    Beaver teeth and wonk eyes with silicone tits. Why is she supposed to be famous?

    Reply
  41. Superficial R.I.P. | September 30, 2008 at 7:43 pm

    I have no idea who’s writing here anymore….but the new superficial is not funny at all. Too bad, this used to be a good gossip site.

    Reply
  42. Ted from LA | September 30, 2008 at 7:44 pm

    I think she is famous because she came from a famous singing family from the 1970s. I think I love you, but that’s not what I’m so afraid of, but it worries me to say, that I never felt this way. She seems fake enough to be related to a mythical TV family.

    Reply
  43. A CUP | September 30, 2008 at 7:45 pm

    #31…more like a neck pillow for an airplane.

    On first glance, it looks like there’s a deformed dick between her boobs. And guess what kind of necklace she’s wearing???

    Reply
  44. WOAH | September 30, 2008 at 7:51 pm

    I thought you said the chasm between her breasts was hosting a part for Bombay sapphire. It looks like you could nestle a bottle of it easily for storage there. Like a perfect breast cupboard for gin.

    Reply
  45. Superficial R.I.P. | September 30, 2008 at 7:54 pm

    THE NEW SUPERFICIAL IS NOT FUNNY AT ALL!

    Reply
  46. Cody | September 30, 2008 at 7:56 pm

    “Folks, I think I’m love”

    Que?

    Reply
  47. mrbrestguy | September 30, 2008 at 8:10 pm

    Her cleavage needs to be cleaved unto itself

    Reply
  48. Miss Miss | September 30, 2008 at 8:36 pm

    Not that hot…at least I can’t see her funky-ass scary eyes.

    Reply
  49. infinetpartners | September 30, 2008 at 8:40 pm

    If she’s into A2M I might stick it.

    Reply
  50. brittney gean | September 30, 2008 at 8:50 pm

    kay like what the hell?? her boobs look so gross, and the men here are just as nasty and horny as her left boob

    Reply

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