Audrina Patridge in a Bikini

May 10th, 2010 // 66 Comments

Audrina Patridge celebrated her 25th birthday in Vegas over the weekend and the wonk-tits are really starting to freak me out. Seriously, what the hell is that? When I stare into a woman’s breasts, the last thing I want to see is Skeletor’s face looking back at me. No matter how many times I yell “By the power of Greyskull!” whenever I get an erection. (Childhood habit.)

Photos: Getty, WireImage
superficial

  1. cd

    seriously, who wears that hat to a pool?

  2. JustGil

    I love titties!

  3. Que

    Que nice.

  4. Parker

    Who cares abouit her tits. I’d pack her fudge any day. What a nice, sweet ass she’s got.

  5. Tooti

    I’d totally do her!

  6. He-Man

    Sweet. I thought I was the only one Fish. Did you bleed and chafe like me too over abusing it?

  7. OTP

    Yeah, she’s really not that good in any way.

  8. Anonymous

    Talentless and irrelevant.

  9. Preemie McDumpster

    Is that a C-section scar?

  10. Viv

    Her belly skin looks a little streched in pic one, is she a mom? If she’s no she’s wat too joung to have streched skin. Her bikini bottom does not cover her well and you can see a bit more than you might want to. I also think the girl in the background in pic 10, the one with the floral bikini, has a better rear view.

  11. Deacon Jones

    She’s got the cleavage of a 45 year old Long Island housewife.

  12. sing

    @ 9 ..No, that’s from a previous jelly roll. I have one, too. It’s even more common for someone who’s had lipo since the skin has no chance to de-wrinkle over time.

  13. Breast Demolisher

    that little cavern is from where my head has worn a groove in her clevage.

    My huge cock+the huge number of times I’ve titty-fucked her=Clevage Grand Canyon

  14. bar room hero

    definitely fake tits; I bop this slag hard.

    looks much better than her tranny friend Heidi.

  15. devilsrain

    14. You mean her tits arent real? Next thing you know youll find out that we breathe oxygen

  16. Movieskank

    OMG EW EW EW EW PICTURE NUMBER 13.

    WTF?????

  17. Blubba

    ME WANT FUCK NOW.

  18. Tek

    Haha! Pic # 6 is classic. Huge gap between them + the rib cage bones = FAIL.

  19. chupacabra

    I hope she’s saving her money…

  20. the EPA

    Audrina is like a Kleenex.

    She is soft.
    You need her when you want something blown.
    When you are finished using her you throw her away.

  21. Parker

    sodomy

  22. TIM GUNN SIGHS

    Ms. Partidge’s bikini bottom provides insufficient coverage unless she is visiting her gynecologist.

    The outer labia of the viaginal area should NOT be visible whilst wearing a swimsuit.

    EVER.

    As for the rest of Ms. Partridge, Ms, Montag should take note.

    There is a badly done proportiate bust enhancement, but natural is far prettier than plastic.

    Audrina’s taste in men or is boys continues to degrade. I though she coiuldn’t go lower then chasing Justin for four years and being used for sex.

  23. TIM GUNN SIGHS

    Ms. Partidge’s bikini bottom provides insufficient coverage unless she is visiting her gynecologist.

    The outer labia of the viaginal area should NOT be visible whilst wearing a swimsuit.

    EVER.

    As for the rest of Ms. Partridge, Ms, Montag should take note.

    There is a badly done proportiate bust enhancement, but natural is far prettier than plastic.

    Audrina’s taste in men or is boys continues to degrade. I though she coiuldn’t go lower then chasing Justin for four years and being used for sex.

  24. Z.

    @ 23 — that ain’t labia, that’s loose skin from over-tanning. Imagine it in a mere 5 years. She’s super hot, though.

  25. Mr. Nice Guy

    She is as good as it gets!

  26. alisa

    lol you all have no idea what you’re talking about! number 10..viv… you’re definitely fat. shut up. 12… de-wrinkle? wtf? everyone has some type of line on their stomach from sitting down over the years… even thin girls.. unless when you sit your belly is completely flat and always has been….. very unlikely. and 24…. loose skin from tanning? you sound like an idiot.. yes tanning causes skin to lose their elasticity over the years but you don’t get it until you’re like 40. many girls have skin around that area.. its just where the thigh meets it…lets see the saggy skin around your balls..ew

  27. turd da third

    Yuk, in pict 12 she has no hips and is all cunty.. Her tits are way to big for some fucktard with no curves…NEXT!!

  28. Send her email address if she needs a date I am available

  29. Send her email address if she needs a date I am available

  30. Hugh Gentry

    her face is absolutely fucking beautiful.

  31. Jeff

    she looks waaaaaaaaaaay better with the sunglasses on

  32. timmy the dying boy

    She actually does have some talent. Unfortunately, that talent strictly seems to be finding new ways of making her tits look weird.

  33. Her body physically makes me sick. Awful boob job, an entire FOOT of “daylight” between her thighs (yet she has no hips..how the fuck does that work???) and ugly grandma knees like Holly Madison. She definitely looks better in clothes. WINTER clothes.

  34. P.S. God awful bikini.

  35. MrSP

    PLease can someone tell me what brand sunglasses she’s wearing? I LOVE THEM!

  36. Her bikini bottom does not apply to him and see a bit 'more than you might want to.You talk like an idiot .. Yes tanning makes the skin loses elasticity over time, but do not get it until you're like 40.

  37. Marcus

    Such a little butt.. So skinny, she probably only poops once a month.. I’m sure she gives a handjob as good as anyone else who has mastered it.

  38. Johnny Stab-O

    My god. Her pooter has a gap as wide as her tits. You could drive a truck through both.

  39. Jackieblue

    get these freaks off the comments , spencer and little friends writing same ool same iol shtt. Audrina looks amazing and is very happy in her lifestyle 100%… we love her so much…

  40. Amazing picture..thank you very much.

  41. thank you your share.

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  44. Retard

    Her vagina oozes out of her bikini. I still like it though.

  45. ? _ ? ? .o ?
    _?_ ? ???????
    ? ? /?\/?\ _ ? __ ? _ ““““““““““““““““““““

    Fist,
    Tell you a story,there used to have a mountain, a temple in the mountain , a monk live in the temple . . .
    then,
    go to my home
    They are SEXY, GORGEOUS and FUN.

  46. she is very sex and beautiful ! i hope see more here !

  47. Great!This article is creative,there are a lot of new idea,it gives me inspiration.I think I will also inspired by you and think about more new ideas

  48. captain america

    well, THIS IS CALLED A DESPERATE BIKINI!!

  49. cc

    I have to confess, when I see her in that bikini my thoughts immediately run to performing oral sex. A lot of oral sex.

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