Audrey Hepburn

Film legend Audrey Hepburn was yesterday named the most naturally beautiful woman of all time by a panel of experts.

Sorry, but no. Audrey Hepburn is not even close to being the most naturally beautiful woman of all time. No offense to her fans, but she’s actually rather ugly. Her facial structure is too rounded, her cheekbones too undefined, and her eyebrows too in need of a trimming. I suppose if this list was “The Most Elf-Like Woman of all Time” then yes, she could possibly qualify for the finals. But the most naturally beautiful woman of all time? No. I really don’t think so. Actually, Liv Tyler was named number two, making me think that maybe this list really is “The Most Elf-Like Woman of all Time.” Honestly though, Liv Tyler truly is gorgeous and really does belong on this list. If it were down to her and Audrey (which it sort of is), my vote would definitely go with Liv. It would probably behoove her to cheer up a bit though. Turn that frown upside down, Liv. You’re the second most naturally beautiful woman of all time.

It’s not really a surprise that Audrey Hepburn topped this list. Being a classic dead celebrity usually wins you favor in the eyes of the old foagies that judge these things. Plus, Audrey Hepburn just sounds like a good answer. Nobody really knows what she looks like but everybody assumes that she was pretty. God forbid some hot blonde bimbo be named the most beautiful woman of all time. That would be an outrage.

Read More [Sydney Morning Herald]
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Tags: Liv Tyler