Ashton Kutcher still not pregnant

ashtoncomplex_thumb.jpgThe Star is sticking to their story that Demi Moore and Ashton Kutcher are expecting a baby despite Ashton’s denial. They say Moore is eight weeks along and due in October and that she got the word on March 4 at the Women’s Care of Beverly Hills clinic and immediately quit smoking. Demi’s people say it’s not true, but those are some pretty damn specific details for something that’s not true. And because people didn’t respond well to Brad Pitt in a dress, here’s a picture of Ashton Kutcher’s hairy nipple from Complex magazine. Sometimes I orgasm just thinking about all the hair on that nipple. Wait, did I say that out loud? Crap.