Ashton Kutcher Is The Gatekeeper Of Literary Truth Now

In a new video posted on – Apparently that’s a thing now. – Ashton Kutcher indirectly addresses the reports about him cheating with Sara Leal on his sixth wedding anniversary to Demi Moore by basically complaining about the celebrity tabloid industry that has been around before he was a bearded speck in his father’s trucker hat. Except listening to Ashton, you’d just assume the system corrupted itself overnight solely to tear down his pure, honest love of scarves and pedantic horseshit that makes no fucking sense. Via Starpulse:

He says, “I just wanted to open up a little dialogue on the state of honesty. The state of truth. The status of truth as it pertains to literature and media… Publishers (once) held great scrutiny over what they were willing to print because their reputation was on the line. When the cost structure comes down on printing… the level of honesty of literature starts to plummet… I started thinking about that in relation to media and social media today where the threshold to actually have literature printed and distributed… is zero dollars… thereby there is no gatekeeper of the truth…”

Kutcher adds, “We are our own editors, we are our own publishers and we are our own printers. Therefore, people can bastardise the truth in any way, shape or form that they want and spread that around the world… A lie can travel halfway around the world before the truth can leave someone’s lips…

Wow, what an incredibly long-winded and douchey way to say, “Please stop paying the whores I fucked to talk about how I fucked them.” It’s almost as if that couldn’t have been distributed through our gates of truth and diligence with only 14 words like I just did in that last sentence. That was probably just a mirage.

Photos: INFdaily