Ashton Kutcher is Cheating on This

September 1st, 2010 // 203 Comments

Seen here doing her best Buffalo Bill impression – “Would you fuck me? I’d fuck me. I’d fuck me hard.” – Demi Moore is apparently getting two-timed by Ashton Kutcher if you consider Star a reliable source, and that he’d be retarded enough to do it right outside of Madeo where Harvey Levin sleeps with a walkie talkie and a pair of binoculars:

“Ashton had this gorgeous girl pinned against the wall, and he was totally making out with her,” an eyewitness, who was on his way to the restroom tells Star. “I was shocked to see him sucking face with a girl who obviously wasn’t Demi.”
When Demi learns the truth of about the steamy session — which Ashton’s rep denied — it will be her worst fear come true.
“All along, Demi was told it would never work, that he’s going to cheat,” a friend tells Star. “When she finds out that it happened, she’ll be devastated.”

Ignoring whether or not any of this is true or not (It isn’t.), I’m pretty sure Demi Moore’s worst fear is less along the lines of Ashton Kutcher leaving her and more along the lines of having to duct tape her own chin back on. That’s probably the one keeping her up at night.

ASHTON: Demi, I cheated on you.
DEMI: Yeah, yeah, sure, sure. Is my forehead still attached? I feel drafty all of a sudden.

UPDATE: Ashton is already responding on Twitter, of course: “I think Star magazine calling me a “cheater” qualifies as defamation of character. I hope my lawyer agrees.” (Thanks to Chloe in the comments.)

Photos: DailyBooth

superficial

  1. its me fuckers

    men are fucking stupid. Look at what Tiger fucked around on. I rest my case.

    • Agreed. Men shouldn’t get married, then this wouldn’t be a problem. Marriage offers nothing to men whatsoever.

      • its me fuckers

        honestly, marriage is a farce.

      • gil

        McFeely Smackup, you are SO RIGHT its not even funny. Marriage is for women, let them get married to eachother.

      • WTF

        Then why are men so stupid… they do the asking and they buy the rings. Shut the fuck up until you grow up.

      • Tracy J

        Then what does marriage offer women? I guess we all want a wedding and an expensive ring and 8 kids and not to work… Cause that’s all pretty typical these days.

    • sounds like we hit a little close to home for “someone”

      • WTF

        Nope – happily married for 20 years. Your comment made no sense. Do you have an answer? Why do men ask??? It sure isn’t for sex.

    • Tim

      She’s old. I don’r blame Ashton. Demi will only get older.

      Men love that new car smell.

      • Deacon Jones

        I said this from day one. She may be hot, but there’s an eternal sea of 20 year olds throwing themselves at this guy, he wouldnt be fucking human if one day he didn’t say “Ahhh, Fuck it”

      • gil

        WTF … u just lied to everyone. Theres no such thing as being happily married for 20 years. the only one happy is your wife because she dosent have to work for the rest of her life and she fucks your brother while you’re at work!

    • Elite

      The only purpose men serve, and by men I mean men of good breeding (the lower classes should not be bred anymore as there are excellent machines now) is their sperm and money.

    • Racer X

      “Happily married for 20 years.” Riiight with rainbows and unicorns outside every morning. I’m sure your “man” has cheated too.

      • WTF

        How did I know that would be the response I got?

      • Amy

        Oh men, how funny you are. You see, us females mature way faster than you. When you reach 30, you’ll realize that your childish notions of “SINGLE FOREVER, FUCK MARRIAGE” is just crazy talk. You’ll start to get more and more lonely. Women will talk to you less and less. You’ll start wanting a little more out of life–a family–someone to share a life with. You’re just too young and ignorant to realize it right now. Women realize it by 25…men, by around 30. Not ALL of them, but most. One day, you’ll realize that your crazy dreams of billions of dollars and unlimited puss are just that, a dream. Porn and cheetos just won’t do it anymore for you anymore.

        And to the asshole that said women want to get married for money, what century are you from? More than half of law school grads and around 50% grads of med school are female. We don’t need your money (most of us anyway). Like I said before, we just realize the important things in life a little earlier than you. You’ll see.

      • Meh

        Oh Amy, how naive you are. 35 here, and most of my friends are 30+. What you’ve described just doesn’t happen. Maybe that’s your experience, but not everyone’s. Things have never been better, and I’m seeing more and more “mature” 30+, 40+ and even 50+ women enjoying the benefits of single life. Don’t be so close minded.

    • chupacabra

      It’s called open marriage. No one can be monogamous without being totally f’n bored out of your ass.

    • He-Man

      Sorry luv,
      it’s the women who are “fucking stupid”. But in addition to being that, they also have the aesthetic shelf-lives of milk. Sadly, the milk is often smelling gamey before they are even out of their 20′s. How sad an existence it must be to have most of your net social worth associated with how youthful you look (for the several milliseconds that it lasts).

      Fortunately, most men (who take care of themselves) are viable even into their 60′s. And to add insult to injury, women are far less interesting/entertaining and far more conformist and jaded by the time they are old women at 30. Every Sex-in-the-city lemming-women, after a certain age, is little more then a walking collection of cultural brainwashing and slogan-chanting…and completely devoid of any individuality and character….unless you consider being a comical and pitiful stereotype as having character.

      Face it, old-ladies, you have nearly nothing to offer when compared to a nubile 18-24 year old. Nothing! And I am really trying to think of something in your defense (cooking, perhaps?). You are less appealing in pretty much every single way by which a woman is judged. Even the so-called “wisdom” a few of you gain as a result of your advanced age is a very unappealing, self-serving, and ultimately repulsive flavor of wisdom. Your conversations are boring and predictable and highly pretentious, presumptuous, and contrived. At least with younger girls, there is less of a buffer between what they think, and what they say, and therefore considerably more honest. Plus, they look like works of art prior to cruel Mother Time scraping her boney (and highly efficient) fingers all over their faces and bodies.

      And duh, of course there are exceptions to the rules, there always are. Thank goodness that every 30+ woman isnt an Oprah-comment-barking, owed-the-world, conformist-stereotype piggy. The rare non-conventional types are what give men hope. But none of the mass-produced hags who’ve commented thus far show any signs of being anything other then another one of the mindless herd of mindless women doing mindless things, and blaming men for being stupid. Which is, of course, unintentional comedy of the highest caliber.

      Who’s really the dumb ones, old lades (or soon-to-be old ladies)?

      So keep repeating the same tired lines, and thinking the same tired thoughts that are driven into your heads by the shows, films, and secretaries you associate with. To those women who’ve risen above the herd mentality, I salute you. But for the rest of the hilariously delusional she-swine,

      ….you honestly and sincerely…have no idea how pathetic you truly are.

      But hey, just keep telling yourselves those things you often do, which keep you positive, affirmed, and hopeful. And please ignore the unpleasant and inconvenient truths which are rapidly approaching. More rapidly then you think.

      Ladies….it sucks to be you.

      THANK GOD IMA BOY, Y’ALL! MAN-POWER!!!!

      • He-Man

        “Oh men, how funny you are. You see, us females mature way faster than you.”

        Well said, Amy. You certainly do “mature” faster, that is for sure. Now get some cream on that wrinkled mature face of yours. And dont forget your calcium. And darn it, that troublesome and tedious menopause will be knocking on the door soon too. Damnit!

        Someone get this lemming a road map.

        Mental midget.

  2. dude

    maybe he got tired of GILF here

  3. First

    I’d wreck her butthole

  4. AC-SLATER

    YO, THIS IS AC SLATER HERE! I JUST GOT A FRESH PERM AND MY SPANDEX SINGLET IS EXTRA TIGHT IN THE CROTCH AREA IF YOU KNOWS WHAT I MEAN. THIS CHICK COULD NOT RESIST MY SWEET DIMPLES NOR MY WRESTLING SKILLS. WOULD TOTALY DROP STOMACH PANCACKES ON THAT ALL DAY. DRINKS ON ME AT THE MAX IN 10 MIN.

  5. The caption makes it sound like it’s hard to believe. Demi Moore is almost 50 years old and looks every day of it.

    She looks SO bad that they don’t even airbrush her any more when they put her on magazine covers with headlines like “Demi, almost 50 and looking fabulous”. They just paste her head onto 20 year old models bodies.

    Because headlines like “Demi, almost 50 and looks so gross we can’t legally show you her real body, so here’s her head pasted on some totally bangable tail” doesn’ t sell mags to aging women.

    • she does look waaay long in the face. when they started dating i thought she was punking him cos of his obnixious show. yet it turns out he’s punkin her after all. i mean we all guessed he could be taggin somethin a LOT hotter than this

    • KV

      BTW, if she’s so hot why the sunglasses ??? To hide the obvious ?? Also… I would like to see her wearing that bikini under the noon sun, that’s when you see the real person, no photoshop’s gonna save you then.

    • MHM

      I’d love to see what you look like McFeely. It’s obvious from the way you type that you think you’re the star of the superficial. Fucking nerd ass loser

      • KV

        Love u hon !!!! Come be a loser with me you seem to know a hell lot about it.

      • How is what I look like even relevant? I’m not 50 years old and plastering pictures of myself in my underwear all over the internet.

        Here’s an idea for you to consider: When you DELIBERATELY post photos like this of yourself, you are INVITING people to comment. Demanding that comments only be positive is childish.

        Also, you can ask your mom how I look. because she likes it…yeah, she likes it good. (queue lame-ass “my mom is dead” response in 3…2…1)

      • Bill Clinton

        Pot, kettle – dumbass.

  6. aaron

    I think she is too old to be taking ‘ face book profile’ pictures like that…

    • Q

      Amen, bro. Classy gal! I bet her cooch is so dry and inverted that Ashton has to put a healthy dallop of lube on that strap-on…

  7. Demi Moore in a Bikini
    Meg
    Commented on this photo:

    Hot!

  8. Demi Moore in a Bikini
    Salvatore
    Commented on this photo:

    OMG, my heart just had an erection!

  9. RoboZombie

    If you look up Douchebag in the dictionary, there’s a picture of Ashton Kutcher.
    Put him in a car with Spencer-the-douchetard and push them over a cliff.

  10. Mandi

    I agree with Aaron. Did Demi Moore really just take an infamous bathroom mirror I’m-so-hot-in-my-bikini facey spacey pic? Really? Being with a younger man has influenced her badly.

  11. gil

    Tine to trade up that used tunnel for a new tight warm pu$$y

  12. Demi Moore in a Bikini
    victory
    Commented on this photo:

    OMG!!!! She uses Crest toothpaste!

    SO DO I !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!11111111111!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!111

  13. Demi Moore in a Bikini
    IM OLD GREEEG
    Commented on this photo:

    She looks better then most women half her age, but I’m pretty sure she starves herself to look like that. Does anyone remember how fat she was before her role in Charlie’s Angels?

  14. L

    I feel sorry for Demi’s kids. Kids need and want a stable role model- not an insecure Facebook Douche Pic parent who never grows up. What does Demi do for a living these days anyway?

    • BettyNuggs

      She and Ashton are damn good act….Bwah hahahahahahahahahah. I couldn’t even type that without laughing hysterically. Both of them are self-absorbed assholes by the image they present. Is that a profession? It seems to be fairly common.

    • *Scryingeyes*

      Right On L! I agree.

  15. Harry Doyle

    Man, this has been “One Crazy Summer” …. get it, anyone? Oh piss off.

  16. Demi Moore in a Bikini
    Tootsie
    Commented on this photo:

    It’s called PLASTIC SURGERY. Her surgeon must be a miracle worker, and must be extremely rich because of her!

  17. Demi Moore in a Bikini
    Hugh Gentry
    Commented on this photo:

    hot for a 50 year old!

  18. Demi Moore in a Bikini
    sitin
    Commented on this photo:

    She can buy me lunch anyday & I’ll supply dessert!

  19. Demi Moore in a Bikini
    sumsum
    Commented on this photo:

    grow up demi…you are 750 years old and taking self portraits in the shitter…don’t you need a hip replaced or something???

  20. KANYEISGAY

    He is easily replaceable ,like his acting career .

  21. Demi Moore in a Bikini
    Commented on this photo:

    She is SMOKING!! No doubt about that… but what’s with the mirror bathroom shots? I find it weird for someone her age to be posting shit like that… makes her seem a little desperate/ juvenile/self absorbed, no?

  22. Demi Moore in a Bikini
    Scryingeyes
    Commented on this photo:

    Can anyone say “I’m totally into myself & making sure my body didn’t revert back to what I really should look like after I’ve wasting an ungodly amount of money being vain with all my plastic surgeries! Age gracefully Demi & get over yourself. You can fool some people, but ya’ aint’ gonna fool old mother nature! Why not donate your millions of dollars to the less fortunate! Most of us would be happy if we could just make it from month to month!

  23. Larry Dallas

    You forget “this” is 47 years old doing shit my tween cousins do.

    • *Scryingeyes*

      @Larry Dallas you are soooo right! My grandkids goof around like that. Very childish for a 47 year old to be so obsessed and insecure with ones own body. I feel sorry for her kids! Their’s so many other things to think about in this world, like true happiness maybe?

  24. She still looks pretty good to me…

  25. Demi Moore in a Bikini
    tarzombie
    Commented on this photo:

    @sumsum
    -really? ya, she’s old, but guess what?, she’s still fuckin’ hot! Hell, she’s better looking than most of the starlets that are half (or a third) her age. Sure she’s had work done, and maybe she’s a bitch, but who cares, she looks great! All women should take notice, not just those in Hollywood, we don’t care how old you get or if you’ve had kids, you still must maintain a fuckable body at all costs. Good for you Demi, let’s hope she at least shaved that hair diaper she had in the 80s, ick!

    • *Scryingeyes*

      @tarzombie….How typically tacky!

    • winter_rogue

      Hahahah!! so your say everyone should have plastic surgery? umm honestly people can look good without having to have surgery.

      • winter_rogue

        Thats only because not everyone feels like running to the doctor in order to be attractive lol …

      • *Scryingeyes*

        @winter_rogue! Thank you for your comment! That’s what I’ve been trying to say all along. You put it in a nut shell! These people on here seem to think because we express ourselves by leaving a negative, but truthful comment, that somehow we’re “old baggy skinned, jealous people who play on the computer”. That’s just NOT the case!

      • *Scryingeyes*

        Oh, and that we don’t work hard to achieve a body that looks as good, if not better than Demi’s.

    • Nique

      So, Mister, us women need to maintain a “fuckable”body. How about you guys then? How fuckable does the average man in Demis age look? FAIL!

      • AS

        I agree with Nique…I just had my 30 year reunion. The men didn’t age as well as the women, and they did NOT care….which was awesome!

  26. Juiol

    A 50 year old girlfriend that takes this sort of pictures? I’ld cheat on her too.

  27. Mee Mee

    If I was married to that hag I would cheat too.

  28. Demi Moore in a Bikini
    Bunny Girl
    Commented on this photo:

    Dear Demi -
    You’re FORTY something… Dont you think youre A BIT too old for cell phone mirror sunglass self-pics? Celebrities are all the same… he probably JUST realized she was busy giving birth to children while he was learning his times tables.

  29. Gene

    Like you didn’t expect this was coming?

    She’s hot, but this is a May December thing that just won;t fly. I mean she grew too old for Willis, right? Jesus – you’d think you knew Hollywood by now.

    Me now, I’d grin till I died.

  30. Demi Moore in a Bikini
    tarzombie
    Commented on this photo:

    @ Scryingeyes
    “age gracefully” is what lazy, fugly women say. blah blah blah, I have a great personality, no one cares, you say being vain like its a bad thing. Some people have pride in themselves and actually want to look good, just because she is 50 doesn’t mean she has to look like shit, lots of young girls in Hollywood look terrible, Demi has motivation to stay fit and you want to talk negative about her? Your the same type of person who would leave negative comments if she was fat and wrinkled like Kirsti Alley “looking her age”. Bravo Demi, keep the erections coming!

    BTW, who cares if her body is a result of surgery, diet, exercise, or a combination of all three, she looks great, and if it is all do to surgery (doubt it), that is one good surgeon. She doesn’t have any of the horrible plastic tell-tale signs, like others; Tara Reid, Heidi Montag etc.

    • *Scryingeyes*

      @tarzombie: Demi only has motivation to fight the natural aging process. I feel it’s an obsession, do you call that healthy? But *HARK* her wallet, her credit card, her cash or whatever; did A LOT to “KEEP THE ERECTIONS COMING”. If you adore and admire a inserted-lifted-nipped-tucked-pull-it-taunt-everywhere person; by all means that’s your prerogative. I myself don’t get turned on over anything Hollywood male or female. I would prefer things to be natural and not turn into an obsession that’s all. And yes, you can find a remarkable, talented, awesome surgeon to do proceedures that are flawless and on the brink of miraculous! But if I were laying beside someone like that and looking into their eyes, my mind can’t help wondering just what’s fake, and what’s not! Each to their own my dear tarzombie, each to their own ;-)

      • Charlotte Corday

        And the winner of the self righteous rationalization prize is *Scryingeyes*
        Hit the gym, dude/hon. Your personality sucks.

      • *Scryingeyes*

        @Charlotte Corday….At least I have a personality…. so bite me!

  31. Demi Moore in a Bikini
    DanieB
    Commented on this photo:

    Seriously, what is up with women, bathrooms, and phone pictures? At least her mirror is clean.

  32. BettyNuggs

    I also recently saw a video of her dancing onstage at a Snoop Dogg concert. She looked like a fool.

  33. Demi Moore in a Bikini
    burton
    Commented on this photo:

    why does it matter if she is posting mirror pics…yeah most teens do that, but who cares…i hate how society gives you a best before date and then after that you dont matter…SAYS WHO..the fukin media who doesnt give a rats ass about you and just wants your money? get real…she is smokin!

    • Nique

      Exactly, what has posting bathroom pictures to do with age? What has going clubbing or wearing short skirts to do with age. What the fuck does anything have to do with age. NOTHING!

  34. Demi Moore in a Bikini
    burton
    Commented on this photo:

    she looks better than alot of teens and women younger than her..fuck off with the your too old shit…THATS OLD.

    • *Scryingeyes*

      @burton….Pa-Lease….Don’t be blinded by your stupidity. Open your eyes an take a good look! But, she’s NOT a teen, nor a woman younger! Where’s her classiness? Oh sorry, she never had any to start with! That’s my point!

    • Nique

      I agree Burton. Although I hate to admit that she probably would not look like this without surgery, she looks great!

  35. Rough'er than leather

    How do you muster the gumption to dog a chick 47-50 (whatever) that looks like that?

  36. Douchariffic

    She looks more like a man than Sylvester Stallone anyway.

  37. josh

    Well apparently “this” is just a shallow girl with her head full of nothing but air. No wonder he walked away.

  38. Michelle

    You guys are cracked out. Anyone of you would give your left nut to fuck someone with a body like that, but if it makes you feel like a “big man” to dog her – then what ever makes you feel better about yourselves.

    • Turd Ferguson

      Why do people always respond like this?
      I’m sorry – this is not attractive to me. No I’m not gay, been married 14 years, i just dont think she is attractive. Personality is part of the attraction for me and she has always come across as a desperate hag.

      • *Scryingeyes*

        @Turd Ferguson…That’s what I’ve been trying to say in so many words, thank you for your comment!

      • lauren

        her teeth are weird. I think she wears dentures.

      • *Scryingeyes*

        @lauren….Her teeth have been OVERDONE….Their so big she has a difficult time keeping her thin lips around them. She can barely close her mouth. The dentist and her must have used massive amounts of veneer! I liked her better without those big denture looking teeth.

    • bitingontinfoil

      Yes, anyone w/a fetish for a thai tranny toothless hooker. One in what Ashton sees in it: GUMMER!!

    • BAWAAAaaahhhaaaa!!!!

      No sweetie, we do not find leather faced 50 year old grannies with weird looking fake titties to be sexually desirable.

  39. Turd Ferguson

    She sure has acted desperate lately – dancing with Snoop and now pretending she is married to Peter Brady and taking semi nude pics of herself like a loser. She is so plastic and fake – never found her attractive and it got worse when she bolted a pair of tits onto her frame.

  40. guest

    why with the sunglasses all the time? she even wears them in the dentist’s chair. it’s ridiculous.

    • *Scryingeyes*

      @guest…The sunglasses are to prevent her eyes from burning out due to the severe whitening of all those “chiklet” teeth she can’t even keep her lips over!

  41. Crabby Old Guy

    Two things.

    1. You think that Bruce Willis is laughing his ass off about this?
    2. Fish – “It puts the lotion on it’s skin” reference. Awesome!

  42. Herman Bumfudle

    fuck!!!

  43. berni

    They brush their teeth with Crest?? I thought celebrities and rich people brushed their teeth with really, really expensive toothpaste.

  44. Demi Moore in a Bikini
    Commented on this photo:

    I agree that she is amazingly hot, but seriously, anyone over the age of 30 who takes a self portrait in the bathroom with their cell phone needs to grow up. She’s attractive with no class.

  45. A Female

    What kind of room is that? That’s a bathroom? well I guess I am an extreme hetero girl b/c I wasn’t even looking at Demi I just wanna know about the room.

  46. Demi Moore in a Bikini
    foo
    Commented on this photo:

    I don’t care how good she thinks she looks–she’s still a pain in the ass–at least to Kutcher.

    • *Scryingeyes*

      @ foo…I agree with you whole heartily!!!

      • hateyoufornoreason

        Whole heartedly, asshole.

      • *Scryingeyes*

        @hateyoufornoreason….I love how people resort to name calling when they don’t have anything intelligent or constructive to say, don’t you? Thank You for correcting my word. You’re the grand prize winner for today’s Spelling Bee, sooooooo what do we have for em’ Johnny?

  47. Demi Moore in a Bikini
    demi lover
    Commented on this photo:

    She’s smoking hot and I don’t care if she’s 75! Keep the pics coming. You’re all just jealous that you’re flabby at 25.

    • *Scryingeyes*

      @Demi Lover….Flabby at 25? No way! If you call being a size 5, 36-23-36 solid without any ‘flab’, waist long cinnamin hair, big greyish green eyes & olive complextion with maturity to boot (jealousy?) you’re sadly mistaken! Oh yeah, and I’m real too! You won’t find implants laying around in my crypt when I die, just bones & no plastic! You also won’t be able to chip away mounds and mounds of veneer off of my teeth either! Ugh….Her dentist should have known when to stop!

      • cody

        hahahaha size 5 36 23 36 that a perfect fucking body theres no way in hell u look that good and ur still playin on the compueter looking at celebrity scandals .ur probably 180 pounds, ugly as fuck and culd never get a guy to touch u throughout ur whole life… and ur caling this bitch immature, i mean fuck ur on the internet talkng shit about people u never have and never wll meet.

      • *Scryingeyes*

        Where do you come off saying that about me, you don’t even know me and you never will! My comments are just that “Comments”. I’m just being honest in what I said! And yes, I do look the way I described. I worked hard to achieve my body without having “nicks & tucks” and surgeries here and there. I just think putting yourself posing for the world to see you in the bathroom is well, “tacky” because she’s insecure. Should I name call “YOU” and say you’re probably some; unhappily married sweaty beer bellied insecure balding social slob who’s lurking around on your computer looking at pics to jerk off too???? Stop projecting!

    • Lindsey

      AMEN! Demi is SMOKING HOTT! Okay, the self portraits in the bathroom are a little immature- but that doesn’t change the fact that she still looks FABULOUS! Think about it, most people her age are flabby skin bags, if you looked like at her age, wouldn’t you want to revel at your hottness?! I sure would. Call me classless. Oh freaking well.

      • *Scryingeyes*

        @Lindsey….NO, I don’t think most people her age are flabby skin bags! Most of us who have decided to take care of ourselves work very hard to stay in shape without the help of nips & tucks, surgeries, and massive amounts of veneers on our teeth. Ya know some of us do look as good, (if not better) than she does!

      • Nique

        Scryingeyes you seriously must be very obsessed with your looks. I feel sorry for you!

  48. Nya

    It seems like with that much money she could at least afford a camera with a timer instead of doing a lame MySpace bathroom mirror shot.

  49. Demi Moore in a Bikini
    HLM
    Commented on this photo:

    It’s a little desperate to post bathroom cell phone pics…what’s next…? The duck face? And that she should really be embarassed by the flailing around she did for Snoop Dogg.

    All the same…If I look that good at her age, you’ll see me on MILFs Gone Wild.

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