Joe Simpson, that old codger, is at it again. This time around he’s trying to broker deals with the tabloids to get daughter Ashlee on the cover when her baby is born. Pete Wentz denied the pregnancy rumors right after the news broke this week. But Joe’s wheeling and dealing seems to be the nail in the coffin. Or penis in the vagina, if you will. Page Six reports:
A magazine source said, “Joe is contacting all the weeklies and asking them to pony up $1 million to put Ashlee on the cover. The deal would include photos of Ashlee – taken by Joe, of course, so he can make more money – an interview and photos of the baby when she has it,” our source said.
Sadly, for Joe it turns out Ashlee Simpson isn’t big news ah shit what? Dammit, too late now:
One magazine editor said the pictures would fetch “$60,000 maybe – but definitely not a million. The timing is a little suspicious. Her album ['Bittersweet World'] is dropping next week, and there was little to no interest until now. Ashlee’s lucky she got pregnant, frankly.”
Whoa whoa whoa, “lucky” to get pregnant? C’mon, that’s not cool. Nobody’s ever “lucky” to get pregnant. That’s like saying, “Oh, wow, Bill’s lucky to have pancreatic cancer.” Jesus, man, have a heart.