one word - silicone

This woman is wreaking havoc on both sides of the Atlantic. But then again, so is Paris.

I refuse to believe that in the world of gossip, this site is relegated to posting Jordan. Tsk. Tsk.

one word(?) - brbrbrbrbrbrb!

Bigfat...you say that like it's a bad thing...I've got two words... Duh...Ammm! I WANT ONE OF THOSE.

I like her whore hair actually
ugly shoes though

Me likey milk!

You're right, Steph - I should have noticed that - but truth be told, I didn't even notice she had feet.

She would be so pretty if she'd only get rid of those horrible implants. Talk about a serious silicone overdose.

I love Jordan, she is amazing. What a fantastic role model for young women everywhere, proving that all you need to succeed in life is to have humongous titties, a tiny waist, whorish hair and make up, and a retarded child!
I am happy that she is representing British women in the USA!
Oh, and really, she is much better that Paris! At least Jordan made all her money herself...
http://celebrityreligion.typepad.com

After you've seen her in the paper every day for the past 5 years, witnessed her being a dick in the jungle, watched the documentary series about her and her 3rd child (her dildo of a husband) you just stop looking.

I'm a girl, so maybe that's why, but - yawn.

"She would be so pretty if she'd only get rid of those horrible implants. Talk about a serious silicone overdose."

She is tiny, apparently, and she actually is beautiful without her make up. The topless pics she did where she has really small breasts were much more attractive than this monstrosity.

Years ago, I created a celebrity slap list e.g. Celine Dion, Mariah Carey, David Spade - people who truly deserved a good slap. Jordan is almost worthy of being on the list. That beng said, I'll give her credit over most C-list celebrities in the UK e.g. Chantelle [Paris Hilton look-alike].

Wow, Michael Jordan's gotten some work done.

I feel sorry for that dress... it's going to explode at any minute...

Chinese people in Shanghai are probably looking at her and going 'What? Why?'

who the eff is this ho?

#17: Jordan is a Brit model/actress/reality tv star who is very well known in the UK and trying to make a name for herself in the States.

"Bouncing"

Those things haven't bounced in years... I'd feel up one of you sweaty, acne faced, cheeto-stained-finger-licking, internet loving freak-parade douche's before risking a sprained wrist on those bowling balls.

Steph, I'm looking at you. Now take out your retainer... thats it... Now take off that sweater vest.... yeahhhhhhhhhh..

excuse me while i salute her.

Ew... her body is so fake it will take centuries to decompose. What's one thing on her that's real?

Her neck? yes, maybe her neck

That new X-Men bad guy is hard to hate........

It really is hard to make Pamela Anderson look understated, but Jordan succeeds monumentally. Next to her, Paris Hilton could play Mother Theresa. Word on the street is her minge looks like Gollum, ensconced beneath the ever-present shadows of those monstrosities. Sweater meat? Those things are sweater slabs.

she's perfect.

Wow.

That is one well dressed drag queen.

*looks up info on Jordan*

Nevermind.

I like her shoes, though.

Wow,

I don't care what people said in the past but she looks fantastic here

Breasts are great, but when your face looks like an ass, it's really not worth it.

There aren't enough paper bags in the world.

And silicone, just doesn't feel like the real thing.

Let's just make it official. She's the female vs. of South Park's Ms. Chokesontits

Are the lines in her neck in pic#2 from her chest or her age? Is she in her 40's? She frightens me.

I have just one thing to say that is completely unrelated but I have to get off my 40Ds:

HOORAY HOORAY IT'S THE FIRST OF MAY FUCKING OUTSIDE STARTS TODAY!!!

Superficial, you truly are ridiculous. Here's a link to a close up of something mighty scary:

http://www.hollywoodtuna.com/photo.php?id=katie_price_mill_2_big&title=Katie%20Price%20aka%20Jordan%20Pictures

You can see the implant all too clearly, then there's the rat's nest of shiny yet utterly weave on top of her head and her body makeup can't cover up the usually-airbrushed-out underarm hair. My Gawd, I will not even go into that face? Is it a face? Yup, she "looks good." Ya f***in morons.

ATTN: England

Keep you third-rate celebrities on Crap Island (AKA England) where they belong. Americans don't have time to put up with your shit. A celebrity in England would be a garbage-man in America (cuz u suck).

I always love it when psuedo-celebs steer into the crazy skid. She used to be pretty attractive and only moderately annoying - a couple days with a ball gag and cattle prod and she'd have been ok. Now? Freakish and really annoying. Blech.

notice how Jude (#12) is sticking up for the inflatible doll they call "celebrity" in good old U OF K? The same Jude that earlier stated anti-American bullshit on another post.

You go, Land-man. Excellent post on #36. And your post Jude, is Excrement.

Those are some big bouncy brains she has. She does look good, but needs to cover up a wee bit.

Yea, I saw landman's #36 post in the FUTURE. But in case that future doesn't happen today, refer to post 32. That one is excellent too.

THAT is the ugliest, dog-ugly, butt-ugly, pig-ugly, fugliest bow wow ever!
What the hell?!!!
Words can't describe it.
Skank?
Tranny?
Drag queen?
2 dollar hooker?
Barnyard animal?
A turd in a dress?
What the hell is it?
I'll tell you what it's NOT. It's NOT a good looking woman.
It needs to get a refund on that deformed plastic body it's parading around.
That creature looks even more diseased than Paris Hilton.

Ever since I've seen that footage of her using the world's loudest vibrator, she is lost to me.

#19 you rock!
So funny!
I bet you are really hot too!

Being awesome is so fun!

wow. what is wrong with the people who find her attractive? aside from looking like a mad comic version of a barbie, silicone should only be acceptable in the porn industry- not everywhere. natural is the only way to go for anything in life.

Absolutely horrific... the boobs are nearly bigger than her head ... ykkidi yukk!

Ok, this chick grosses me out. But, I got thinking: What if I sawed her legs off, then twisted her butt around so it faced forward. Cut the head off, put it in a bag (like Medusa) and throw it to the bottom of the ocean. Stretch the arms staight out backwards, attach springs. Turn upside down. Recliner by Jordan!!!! (tm)

and oh, so comfy!

1.beach ball implants, yuck
2.bad weave
3. ugly clothes..she looks like she is wearing a Donny and Marie throw away. I hope those monsters leak.

Those bobbies look very very HARD...

Jordan. I want to bring out your inner lesbian, Jordan.

Hi Megan;

I have alternatly heard that you are a 97 lb. girl, a douche bag, Oscar De Mateo, a school girl, a man, now a lesbian etc., you get the point. Tell, will the real MH please stand up? Are you a brown man from Miami? Are you a woman? I can't take it any more.

umm...okay...one of these posts is not like the others, one of these posts is not quite the same...#45 et al are you blind??

FUCK!!!

Superfish Guy...or Girl. Please, will you enable a spell checker on this site. I can't tell if I am spelling something wrong until I post it, and that drives me crazier! FUCK!!!!

Megan?? Swearing and lesbian references in your posts today? This seems a bit unlike you....

Blind

Tranny Granny -yes- "Brown" - you were correct the first time- it means "having no standards"

Doing Russian between two beach balls covered in baby oil--the Jordan experience you can have at home! And less post-orgasm horror and shame! Unless your wife finds you. Not that I know.

You got the 'dime' - she's got the 'time'....

She looks like a porn star. And by the way - ANYONE can look like that, at any age (just ask demi)....if they have the cash - and want to emulate anna nicole....

I bet the conversation gets boring quickly with this one....haha And don't tell me THOSE are gonna look good when she is 80! hahaha

I'd tap it.

you can try to call out ANYONE on here like that.

FACTS about Me: Girl, 97 lbs. 22years. 5'6" lives in Pincrest. I like "screwed" by PH.

FALSEHOODS: I'm a guy, I'm Jessica Simpson, I'm Mateo, I'm fat, I'm a "tranny" I give a shit about what anyone thinks.

Ahem. I believe we were talking about Land-Man's cock.

she looks like she's gonna pop

It's a scientific formula personified. The bigger they get, the closer her expiry date.

Well I would have said something about her tits but what the hell hasn't already been said about Pam's, let alone hers? They're gigantic and out there and quite honestly speak for themselves.

It is a sad sad thing when women become what THEY think what most men desire. Yes, just boobs.

I still have no idea who this Jordan is.
I think her boobies may be fake. Fake like Meganharris having a vagina.

Where the fuck is Osh, Papa, Mamacita, boredmilf, BigJim and anyone else I'm leaving out? I feel like I'm the only one left here.... MeganHarris, huh, never thought I'd say this, but I'm glad to see yah... TrannyGranny, check, Land-Man, check, NewGuy, check... Italian Stallion, check...

TCLTC...

Can this bitch sleep on her stomach????

Lala, CruisingForCock, UNWASHED MASSES, Gerald Tarrant, good to see you....

Even Edna, where the fuck is she???? I need to be reported...

Holy fuck 4 in a row.... I feel like biatcho. BTW, where the fuck is that cuntrag? I miss her too.

Good to see you too krisdylee -
I just noticed that my new lover did not mention his cock once in his post. Come on Land-man - Tell us how big it is again. Take off your shirt and tell us!

#62 if she cuts holes in her mattress!

Shortly after her appearance thousands of flat-chested Chinese girls committed suicide.

And what the hell is a millionaires fair? What's she doing at one? Shopping for a sugar daddy no doubt, in that dress..oh brother!

I can't believe anyone would say she's hot. She's so tan she looks black (which, if you're actually black is not a bad thing but when you're white it looks fricking weird), her breasts are way too huge, her body is too skinny, and she's so covered in make-up you can't even tell what she actually looks like.

Ew.

Oh, I almost forgot to add: Her whore hair looks all plasticy like Barbie doll hair.

she fucking hot, but who the hell is she??

@55

You lying bitch. You are soooo not 97 lbs. Unless............................. Hmmm. What if you're not Jessica Simpson, but you're actually Nicole Richie? Wait. I thought you and Paris hated each other!!!! Just what the hell are you trying to pull here? I demand an explanation!!!!!!!

@62
Word up. I have to say, I don't miss biatcho. Homegirl has deep-seated rage and it's exhausting.

I just threw up in my mouth.

TCLTC

Suddenly, I'm very thirsty.

Hasn't Jordan banged about 90% of the soccer guys in England?

I sat next to this bitch on the plane from NYC to London. During the safety check the filght attendant looked at me and said, "In case of a water landing, just grab on to that chick's tits.

Just got back from Shanghai, it's f'ing awesome. Shanghai is the most capitalistic place on earth.

Oh, yeah, and Go Flames, Go!

@76 It's a good thing you didn't go down....

The plane didn't go down, but she did.

I'm not sure...but she looks like she would bite it off and then spit it out in your eye.

1-0 now, BigJim... Battle of Alberta??? Now that's Canadian.

This chick freaks me out. Seriously if I saw her walking down the street, I'd be hard pressed not to stare at her as if she were a dwarf transvestite with Down's Syndrome, walking a purple poodle on a diamond chain.

BTW, dudes that think this is sexy?? She still poops the same as me.

I wish I knew who she was..

Fuck, am I ever in a bitchy mood tonight. Angry sex is definately on the menu for me tonight. My little toy that makes a quiet buzzin' sound ain't cuttin' it tonight. Fuck all you guys, I'm going to get laid.

You think THAT looks good? Just another run of the mill hooker to me...

"Fuck all us guys" and you'll definitely get laid.

sorry i just farted.

lolpop: You can always find flaws in a person if you look too closely. If you can only see problems in HiDef, they don't count.

I don't even like fake tits or fake tans and I especially don't care for random people who become famous for doing absolutely nothing. However, Jordan is as close as it gets to a perfect 10.

See, there's a big difference between the kind of person we dream about and the kind of person we actually date. Jordan falls into the first category because she looks like she fell out of a comic book. That's alright with me.

Things our lab puppy ate--or attempted to eat--today:
3 crayons
a sock
a wet diaper pulled from the trash =0
2 catnip toys
a piece of wood from the bk yard
1 leg of kitchen table (>>>>

She isn't hot. Just kidding.

two words: big boobs.

Next on "Jordan Goes To Hospital":

Doctor: You again?? You know we've had to resort to brining in our very own silicon guns from home after you--
Nurse: No doctor, she's just come back from a party.
Doctor: My...God. We'll need four professional paint scrapers immediately- this bitch's face isn't going to cave in under the weight, not on MY time!

@55 It's not healthy for ANYONE of your alleged height to be your alleged weight,let alone when you're A MAN. You must look like the living dead.
@40 It/He/She comes from the porn industry. What didn't give it away?
@75 The father of her first child is a football player. When he'd sobered up, he denied impregnating her and publicly embarrassed her by demanding dna tests. The blind, braindamaged child is only slightly more retarded than her.

#94... thats a bit harsh talkin bout her kid Harvey like that. She cant be that retarded as shes a millionaire...

Despite the fact she exploits her body, she has made loads of money from doing that so good luck to her thats what i say. Don't underrestimate her. The entire British press may slag her off but she has the last laugh, all the way to the bank.

And FYI she isnt a porn star, shes a "glamour" model.

oh one more thing, the only reason her breasts look so big is that 1. shes so tiny (like 5ft 3 and 7 stone) and 2. because theyre fake and they just kinda sit there on her chest. if she had real breasts which are 32FF they wouldnt look so big. If you see her in real life theyre no where near as mammoth as you'd imagine. she's no Lola Ferrari.

@95 Her kid IS blind and braindamaged. What's harsh about saying it?
She's not a millionaire because she's clever, she's a millionaire because she's prepared to do things decent people won't do.

And for YOUR information, she has done porn videos, slag rags, with her legs spread and her diseased crotch on display.

Who cares what her/his vital statistics are, the body looks deformed and out of proportion. It's a tough call to say what's uglier - her body or her face!

'Despite the fact she exploits her body, she has made loads of money from doing that so good luck to her thats what i say.'

This is what's wrong with society. Kids like you think it's fine to prostitute yourself as long as you make a lot of money.
You must be a kid if you don't know Jordan's done porn, ffs!!!!!!!
Any female can do what she's done. But most women don't want to walk around with saggy clownish balloons attached to their chests.
I don't think it was a master plan, she's really not intelligent (have you heard her speaking?)
I think she must've done it to distract people from her ugly face. Those falsies are not attractive, so what other reason could there have been?

I'd hit that

Anyone who drinks during pregnancy deserves to have their children taken away. Her poor son...what a cunt!

I wonder is Moses is blind since mummy was sucking on the Guinness a few weeks ago.

Let me just say...who cares if they're Real, Fake or just Real Fake????

I'm always in the mood for a game of MOTORBOAT...cause im a MOTORBOATIN SONABITCH!

That picture just convinced me to do something I should've done a long time ago ...let me get my penis...

She'd make a perfect pornstar. Yeh, that's what she should be doin. :)

#96 - if they were real, they'd be by her ankles by now.

It's like a freakshow, only much less entertaining, and far more vapid.

She looks like she smells really really bad!

I was going to post sooner, but I've been staring at those luscious melons for a looooooooong time.

No that was a home made video which was leaked on the internet, It wasnt a porno vid like Jenna Jameson makes, it was never meant for public consumption! Doesnt make her a porn star anymore than One Night in Paris makes Paris Hilton a porn star. And if men are stupid enough to pay £8.99 for a calender of Jordan with her baps out, more fool them. Shes just making money off blokes inability to think with anything other than their cock.

For all of you poor fuckers that dream about having someone like Jordan here you go:

http://www.ultradolls.com/angie.htm

You can thank me when you're finished but please wash your hands first.

Holy milk-monsters, we made it all the to #99 before somebody said they'd hit it?

I wonder if she took off from being a whore yesterday, I can't really tell if she is Mexican or not.

I think the Mexicans that come over here and do good work should get some kind of Grant. The ones that don't should get sent back.

They can call it an Immi-Grant.......

Any woman CANNOT do what she does. First and foremost, you have to be blessed genetically and you have to be able to work it. All the plastic surgery in the world won't help a LOT of people. It won't make you tall, it won't keep fit for you, it won't help you with your fashion sense, it won't keep your confidence up, it won't flirt and tease for you.

There a countless normal, pretty girls, with fake boobs featured in playboy every year who are only in the limelight for as long as it takes to rub one out. Jordan has created something very big for herself that relies as much on her bedside manner and her networking skills as it does on those giant balloons she has attatched to her chest. If you can sing or dance or if you're good at math, you use those skills to get somewhere in life. If you're hot and you know how to manipulate the public, you use that.

The fact that you seem so concerned about people "prostituting" themselves out on this site, of all places, makes me wonder why you're here. Actors and actresses and musicians do it all the time, they are just not as straightforward about it. Exploitation is basically a REQUIREMENT in the industry, so if you have a problem with it you shouldn't be supporting it.

@97. Can you direct me to her pronos? I have a hard.. time believing you. (not that home video either ;)

@97. Can you direct me to her pronos? I have a hard.. time believing you. (not that home video either ;)

I'd like to be the first poster to prostitute myself out on this site. For a small deposit into my PayPal account I will respond to your posts with comments like "That was the funniest post I've ever seen!!" or the immortal "LOLOLOLOLOLOL" or even "LMAOROTFL" or "You are a message board God!!!" If you are into a little S&M I have "That was the stupidest post I've ever seen, douchebag!!!" or "Why don't you do us all a favor and etch your stupid post onto a bullet and shoot it back into your brain!!" I can even invent some more screen names and give you a twofer!! There will be no better message board whore than I!!"

I'm sorry if this was already said, but I woke up late and quite frankly I am to tired to read all the other post-

What is this fair? A place where whores parade around and rich guys buy them or their services? I know I can't get on the invite list, but maybe I could be a bus boy-maybe I could get some nice rich guy left overs

YUUUUMMMMY! Woof, woof, woof! Woof,woof! I'm sorry, what was I sayin'?...

so, who is she?

why is she famous?

in other news, a new chicago hot dog place just opened on my little island. i'm so exited. i think i will have a chicago dog for lunch. i hate johnny cakes.

Any of you that said negative things about her, shut your holes.

Men want to f**k her, women want to look like her.

I think I'm in slut love.

OH MY GOD OH MY GOD OH MY GOD I am in LOOOVE with Jordan!!!!!
those ain't her best pics definitely, but Jordan is hotter than hell!!
I have a huge crush on her!!!!

#108 ...well thanks for adding another topic to bring up to my psychologist. What The Fuck!!

P.S. the "LoveDoll" is hotter.

so...who is she? and why am i being told that I apparently want to look like her? i'll concede her face is pretty, but those boobs look like rocks. she must have to go to millionaire's fairs so she can get somebody to pay for the doctor's bills she has, because he back is all messed up on account of how heavy her chest is.she looks like she's going to fall face first on the red carpet.

Jordan = Janice Dickinson, Jr.

Jordan's real name is Katie Price, she started off as a glamour model years ago in UK, she's a B-class celebrity in UK and makes a living selling stories about herself th the british tabloids.

In UK we dont really have celebrities soo anyone that makes it in the tabloids becomes a celebrity, they dont have to act or sing or even pretend to have any artistic abilities, and thats the situation with Jordan, she's a celebrity simply because her pictures everywhere...

ps. that second pic makes me horny

@1
No you don't say, those aren't real?

damn almost first

When did Ryan Seacrest get a perma-tan and implants?? His dress looks like a K-mart blue-light special -- I like his hair weave though.

c'mon, Jordan is much better than any love-doll,after all, she is self-heating, self-moisturizing, and she comes with cum-breath...

ohh please people... she is one of the hottest girls walking on earth!!! all of you who say bad things about her... you're either fucken jealous, gay, or a fuckin moralist fuck!!! and the only place where you can find such thing as a Kmart is in America, HICK!!!

pick your jaws off the floor!!!::
http://www.thesmsguide.com/katieprice/b11-lrg.jpg

129. Sooooo, you can pick one of those up at KMart? Must be reeeaaalll classy.

What a hooker! Love that she's at a "Millionaire's Convention". Holy shit, the hoes must be coming out the woodwork at that place. Maybe she and Anna Nicole Smith can meet a 95 year old rich guy with a weak heart, kill him with a three way and contest the will!

Seriously, this hoe is one old guy's shriveled up cock away from making it!

Listen up little girls!

wow Wow WOW. I can't even hear you haters commenting because my cock is so hard.

ew her hair looks really ratty and she has too much different colored shit on her face, it makes her look like an old drag queen. Maybe with a hair cut, a comb, and less paint she wouldn't look so disgusting.

i don't get it. I think she looks like a freak

xd, only desperados would think that creature was hot. I guess if the only females that let you near them look like cheap and nasty disease buckets, you'd think this one was a catch.
SoupaSarah, What can I call someone who doesn't know that Jordan's done porn? You know? Sex on video for money or filmed prostitution. Call it what you like, she's a 'ho.
She's ugly, thick as shit and her body's a state.
You seem to rate her, so I'm betting you're not too bright or attractive yourself.

#96 - what the fuck is a stone? go back to russia. And suck my land cock.

Even though she looks kinda of tranny in some photos, I'd love to rub my face in between her boobs. I think she looks sexy in the first three shots. I wish I was that dangly zipper pull, so I could be near her awesome breasts. I'd definately hit that over and over again.

i don't know who she is and i don't care..i see knees over ears and a giant gape...pornstar in two years...scoreboard

Here's for copy and paste, the above said exactly what I was thinking ....

Skank?
Tranny?
Drag queen?
2 dollar hooker?
Barnyard animal?
A turd in a dress?
What the hell is it?

Here's for copy and paste, the above said exactly what I was thinking ....

Skank?
Tranny?
Drag queen?
2 dollar hooker?
Barnyard animal?
A turd in a dress?
What the hell is it?

She looks like a pornstar with major plastic surgery ... YIK ... nasty bitch !

@118:

I am a woman and I do NOT want to look like that. I actually have self-esteem. What is she gonna have when her "looks" go? Not a damn thing, and I pity her for that. If any man wants someone like her over me, that's fine, they are welcome to each other. I don't need a man to validate me, unlike her. Poor thing, all that fame and money cannot buy her what she so desperately needs: Class, self-esteem, intelligence and a sense of right and wrong. What we DON'T need is another, skankier UK version of Paris Hilton . We already have one slow-motion trainwreck to laugh and ridicule, I think that is plenty.

OOOOOOOO-KAAAAAAYYY.

I think everyone is missing the point here. And that is that this. . .person. . .is at the SHANGHAI MILLIONAIRES' FAIR. Wtf? No, wait, this deserves the real thing. . .WHAT THE FUUUUKKK? Is there really such a thing as a fair for millionaires? What do they do there, buy new wives and solid-gold crappers?

What a weird, weird world we live in.

xd - is that you Jordan?
Only ugly guys dig her. She's NEVER had a good-looking man. Pretty women certainly don't want to be like her - she's foul.
It's pretty well known that this ugly girl has very low self-esteem & probably body dysmorphia too.
She knows no-one would give her the time of day unless she's got her fake tits out or her smelly fanny on show.
Poor Jordan, of course guys want to fuck her - nasty, ugly, desperate losers!!
Wonder how many diseases she's racked up by now?

Well within Patriarchy women can never win, if we dont sleep with you we're frigid, if we do we're whores. You all slag her off yet I bet you will spend 8 quid buying her calender or 3 quid on FHM with her on the front cover! mentalism.

I'm just angry that we men can't whore ourselves out in the same way as Jordan and Paris. I'd be great at it. I'm tall, goodlooking and have no discernible talents either.

Why can't I be rich and invited to lots of parties based on my the size of my willy and my good looks !

This is a form of racisim ! .. I tell you. We need to take a stand. blah blah blah .. so on and so forth.

@129 Thank you sir. And Jesus loves you and Jordan.

Oh SoupaSarah, you really do talk a lot of nonsense! That's not surprising since you're a Jordan fanatic (her fans tend to be as stupid as she is).
Just because all YOUR men spend money on images of Jordan, don't kid yourself that every man is just as hard up!
As I said, only ugly, awkward and desperate guys go for easy lays. Think how many rancid dicks she's sucked and fucked to become Britain's richest whore!
This is a woman who had unprotected sex with a guy who was just passing through her and many other girls. She got pregnant. He didn't want anything to do with her. She then went and fucked a teenage boy WHILE SHE WAS PREGNANT WITH ANOTHER MAN'S BABY. He also denied it and didn't want anything to do with her. This ugly bitch has been used and dumped so many times she must be the size of a bucket!
And all this because the dog hasn't got enough intelligence to sell anything but her body.
She's a joke!

I could careless about her lovelife. As long as I can see pictures of her behemoths life goes on. Some of ypu people act like she invaded your home!

143, Jordan is a millionaire herself, which might explain why she's there.

148 Treacletart (that name seems familiar, oddly...) - what's wrong with having sex while pregnant?