Now, I'm not a man, and I don't have a penis, but if I was a man this picture would make my penis hurt very badly. SOM.

I fucking hate this man/woman! Why won't he/she go away? What a train wreck.

Ouch, she's scary.

She's a crazy old hag. I liked her story last night on ANTM about falling off the runway because she was plastered. Yeah I watch ANTM.

Her dress looks like those smock-thingys that they make you wear when you get your haircut.

Osh - You literally took the words out of my mouth about the penis!

She is one ugly and scary bitch!

Jacq, you fat muff diving lesbian!!!! Check your satandamn email!!!! By the way, I picked up that satandamn trick from Stallion so I can't take credit for it.

Wait, there's a woman in these pictures? All I can see is very hot very naked man flesh.

I watch ANTM too, I love it how she says she's beyond that now but she keeps appearing as a guest on the show. What a loser...

So about Janice Dickinson, did she have a stroke when I wasn't looking? Also, in that first pic, she's making a face like "Oh, this is so disgusting" and you know that guy is thinking "Bitch, don't make that face at me!! I want you to use those giant scissors to cut my dick off because I'd rather bleed to death than have your face this close to mine!!!"

#5 I agree, it does look like one of those smock things. Me thinks it's for all the drool and what not...cause she can't close her mouth for some reason.

Janice do'in the Bobbit LIVE on TV?!?! Shoot!!! I missed it!!!!

Please tell me they're casting her as the Joker in the next Batman movie.

No way in hell does that crazy ass biatch get anywhere near my johnson with some scissors...

Who's this Janice Dickinsider? All I know is that tatoo'd model could bend me over my kitchen table and spank me with a pancake, papa style.

Look everybody, it's Norma Desmond!

And I would never let that woman/thing come at me with scissors. Never, never, never.

By the way, can anybody give me the info on how to sign up with her modeling agency? I want to learn how to look Just Like Her. Or Him. Whatever It is. She's great advertising for her agency, don'tcha think? I bet they're lining up at the doors.

That's probably the ugliest dress I've ever seen. And why is she making such a fugly face in the first picture, she acts like she's never seen a man in underwear...which means she's in fact a sexless being who thinks sex is dirty and might make her look fat.

I like it when Papa spanks me with oliveloaf. Drrrty.

I actually accidently confused her as a dummie for quite a while.

today janice dickenson opened a MODEL NEUTERING SERVICE...taking a page from bob barker...whom she's starting to kinda look like...

janice...we need you stand in our garden in a couple of months...thanks, doll.

Scuse me while I wipe the puke from in between the keyboard buttons.

This seems pretty obvious to me. She is too ugly to get laid by quality cock anymore and she isn't famous enough to pull in a really high ranking trophy boy, so whats an old ugly woman to do? Easy! Start a modeling agengy. Desperate, insecure, yet hot men all there waiting to service her to get modling jobs. She's pretty smart for a 300 year old whore.

I'm with #8, I didn't even see a woman...

Those guys are so hot I couldn't take my eyes off of them.

Thanks, Superficial, you've given my something to daydream about while I'm supposed to be working... drool...

I love her. She is a lip explosion of good, clean, crazy fun.

You know what? I LOVE Janice. She's so harsh and severe on so many levels. I enjoy the fact that she makes people squirm at the very sight of her. The fact that she evokes such a strong response, as evidenced here, means she must be doing something right. Like it's been said, there's no such thing as bad publicity. So keep ragging on her. The more you do it, the longer she'll stick around.

#10 you are the most unfunny fucker on superficial.

@25

A maggot-covered corpse that's oozing bodily fluids and smells like a salmon fillet that's been sitting in the hot sun for 2 weeks also evokes a strong response, but that doesn't mean it's a good thing. You defended Paris Hilton in that thread about her and Nacho, which means that no one will ever care what you think or respect you EVER.

P.S. When I say no one, I mean your parents too.

@26

Let's see. Would I rather be unfunny OR a man with no penis? Hmmmm. Unfunny, man with no penis. Unfunny, man with no penis. I'll take unfunny please!!!

Land-Man please take your Air-Penis to the Free-Clinic. Your Cheese-Dick smells like Tom Cruise's Ass-Hole and the stench is burning our eyes.

SOM!!!

You're not helping your case with shit like that mamacita.

Oshkosh, get the fuck back to Crapville and fuck u.

She has enough botox in her face to paralyze an elephant. I'm amazed she can even move her mouth to speak. It probably takes her like 10 mintues to force her facial muscles to change expressions. Also, did she raid Joan Rivers's closet?

@31

Do I have a case? Well, shit, I didn't know I had a case!!! Maybe I should get an attorney or something then.

P.S. Quit saying fuck so many times. It doesn't make you any funnier. It only works like that if you're ALREADY saying something funny, not if you're saying it INSTEAD of something funny.

OMG!!!!!!!! SOM!!!!!!!!!!!!! MLOB!!!!!!!!!!!

#31 - It's Mamacita that lives in Crapville. She's the scatologist. Oskhosh lives next door to me in Shit Town. Come for the smell and stay for the plesha. And you are the most unfucked, unfunny person here.

mommy that man is scaring me!

Didn't you hear? We have internet access in Crapville now so I can be in my dear sweet home town of Crapville, USA, and post on the Superficial at the same time! Thank God, because I was getting tired of driving all the way to your mom's house in Detroit and using her computer, although she does give the best head in Motown.

first: who is this woman...what is she known for?

second: am I crazy, or does she sort of look like Teri Hatcher?

third: why do these threads seemed full of people who like to fight? over the internet? on a snarky gossip site?

I wonder if Lorena Bobbitt made that face when she cut off her husband's wee-wee.

Moedling agency-Bullshit- It looks like she is opeing a gay bath house- nothing wrong with that, just be honest about it.

Jan DICKinSON Bath for Boys.

Is it a modeling service, or a personal dating service? I can just see Janice now, all high off vicodin and vodka, ripping into some young buck model wannabe as he's pumping into her surgically enhanced vagina. Insulting the poor boy as she does America's Next Top Models, spurring him on to greatness by making gross faces and acerbic comments. When finished, she tells the spent youth who sacrificed his penis in the altar of her abomination that he's no Sly Stallone.

god, it looks like she's wearing a house curtain and popcorn garland necklace.

http://www.thevelvethottub.com

-

Hmmmmm.......

1. Tarted up, Old Queen Tranny- CHECK!
2. In a long sleeved gray dress with hideous pearls- CHECK!
3. Surronded by burly tanned man flesh- CHECK!

DAMMICE JANICE!
http://www.corrigo.dk/filmsvar/images/pic_RockyHorror.jpg

I also have to admit, I like this crazy bitch. I think she would fit in well in Superficial-land. And you gotta give her some props for being unique - she could have just started her own pathetic clothing line or worse - perfume line or restaraunt like every other Hollywood poser...worse yet, she could of just gotten pregnant by Angelina Jolie to rejuvenate her flailing career...oh yeah, I forgot, then she would have to change her name to Brad Pitt.

Did anyone see that old Angelina Joile movie "Gia"? Supposedly, the girlfriend character was based on Janice and her relationship with Gia back in the day.

OH ....MY....GOD my eyes are bleeding, what a hidious monster, she looks like Betty Davis in Whatever HAppened to BabyJane

Isn't Janice aging gracefully?

She looks so beautiful.

Janice, how do you do it?

#8 HARA wrote: Wait, there's a woman in these pictures?

REPLY: I don't think that's been confirmed. And no, don't look at me to confirm it.

#44....really? Did Janice start off as a make up artist? because that was the girlfriends job, she wasn't a model....just wondering

My gosh, Janice's lips are like floppy meat curtins.

Janice Dickenson makes me clench my ass

44-

wasn't gia's girlfriend the hairstylist/ makeup artist ? ?

Janice doesn't do makeup?

I think sara1beth2 is dumb

It's just a jump to the left,
And then a step to the riiiiiight
Put your hands on your hips
You bring your knees in tiiiiiight
But it's the pelvic thrust that really drives you insaaaane
Let's do the time warp agaaaaiiinnn
Let's do the time warp agaaaiinnnnn !

Will this modeling agency employ heterosexuals or just those guys in the photographs? Not that you can't make a good living representing the 80% of male models who are gay. Believe me, I know. Rrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr.

http://v64.com/bio.html I don't really know, my brother (who does a viscious Janice drag show) told me about it.

My dog looks like janice dickinson, now i don't know weather to love it or hate it.

and jugsgirl, thank you so much for your intellegent insight, i value it

That guy is too bare! I need hair on the chest....

Rite-on Hollyj, but it's closer to this rocky song:

"In just seven days... I CAN MAKE YOU A M-M-M-A-A-N-N-HAN-HAN-HAN-HAN!"

Or at RIALTO midnite show:
"I can make u a Fag, just like ur DAD!"

#44, no Janice mentioned that she knew Gia in her book because Gia was getting some play after the Angelina Joie movie and even though she and Janice weren't great friends she did a chapter on her in her book including one or two ads where they had posed together. Apparently there is an unconfirmed police report that Gia didn't die of aids, she thought a syringe full of botox Janice had in her purse was heroine...well you know, shit happens.

57 -
no problem, it was my pleasure

MeganHarris, if you would stop shaving your chest, the hair will grow back naturally.

aah, thanks spindoc, i appreciate it, i just knew that my bro had said it was loosely based...then jugsass said i wa dumb, and, well, thanks. damned botox
anyway

Ummm, take a look, a real close look at the fellow on the right. Let's just be clear here. No, he doesn't want Janice near his manhood. But let's be equally clear. He doesn't want Jessica Alba near his manhood either.

All of which makes this is a good time to segue into a Tom Cruise comment.

jugsass - i like the sound of that. its hot. don't be suprised if my next comment is made under the name jugsass! Thanks sara3beth4

anything for you

shucks, you made me blush

#63, you are right, and I will give one more comment about the guy in this picture.....Definitly the male version of a "Butterface"

FIRST POST!!!!! Yeah, I rock!

I bet Janice Dickinson hates dalmations. 101 of them to be exact.

Bigger morons that MeganHarris:

Jacq
Mamacita
Oshkoshfuckhead

DAMN! AM I SECOND????

In the first pic, you see really see that, despite the makeup and the plastic surgery, she really is aging. It looks weird, maybe worst than it would look if she had never had anything done. It's like her facial muscles are pulling in all kinds of contorted directions.

both of those guys are obviously gay. and the one on the left gave me head at the Viper Room last night...

That man is very smooth. Like a bald, muscled hamster. I don't know as to whether I'd hit it.

Man, she looks like an even uglier version of Teri Hatcher..

With the amount of makeup this hag wears, she could easily get a job at the circus or a rodeo as a clown...

Janice Dickinson looks like she just caught a whiff of Land-Man's balls.

#37 megana is MeganHarris' slightly fatter more canadian identical cousin.

A 20 year old man came into the ER with a stony mass in his rectum. He said that he and his boyfriend were fooling around with concrete mix, when his boyfriend had the idea of pouring the mix into his anus using a funnel. The concrete then hardened causing constipation and pain. Under general anesthesia, a perfect concrete cast of the man's rectum was removed along with a ping pong ball.

Land-Man, does your ass still hurt? That's not how you play ping-pong you fucking idiot!!!!

what's the difference between a fag and a freezer?

a freezer doesn't fart when you pull the meat out!

Did you ladies see #70? I'm FIRST BITCHES!
How I wish Sherryco was here to make things simplier for me.

LandMan - I know you've got to be retarded and your keyboard is covered in drool and that's why I'm a bigger moron "that" Megan. Your finger slipped. Mine did, too, but it was only to flick you off. I bet you hate everyone because that tranny in the black dress is your dad.

Does anyone else love to hear Janice brag about being the "world's first supermodel" on ANTM? She's probably got a coffee mug that says "World's Best Mom", too.

#75 - MeganHarris could also join the circus if she'd let her beard and chest hair grow back.

#78 - You should have seen it when there were two more balls in his butt, if you know what I mean! I knew he'd be the catching, seeing as how he sucks and all.

#2 said it all.
#21 - nice to see ya again!!

Ok, I'm going to be very MeganHarris and disagree with my post #82.
Megan can't join the circus, because the fact that a guy can grow chest hair isn't weird at all.

I've got two meaty Land-Balls with Jaqcs's name on them. Open wide. They ain't made of Papier Mache. More like brass. HAHAHAA

Is she related to the Joker?

Should he be circumsized at this age?
Looks dangerous..........

Hey Pedro, this guy won't wear the ribbon!!
Who dares not to wear da ribbon?
You must wear da ribbon......
Who the hell do you think you are not to wear da ribbon.....

That guy is eye candy.

No way any of the guys in these photos, including Janice, are straight. no way.

Who gives a shit about Angie Dickinson? Call me the Load-Man.

#85 - Your balls are mine.

#77 - I bet it is more like that Simpsons episode where Bart had a conjoined twin and they made the evil twin live in the attic after they cut him off. He looked twisted and they only fed him Lil Lisa Slurry. Then, it turns out that Bart is in fact the evil twin. So, that makes MEGANA better than MeganHarris the original. But, seriously, COULD it get any worse?

Land-Man

Well, Air-Cock, you're just too darned clever. Jacq, OshKosh, girls let's pack it in cause Land-Man is apparently too smart for us. There is one tiny little detail I've got to mention.

"Bigger morons that MeganHarris:

Jacq
Mamacita
Oshkoshfuckhead"

Besides the obvious rule about trying to avoid misspellings when calling someone else a moron, you forgot something else. Do you realize that you're using one of OUR jokes to call US morons??!!! We came up with that MeganHarris shit and now you're calling us bigger morons THAT her which is impossible because we INVENTED the stuff about how stupid she is. That's right, I said INVENTED. Don't think about it too hard or your balls might explode in your pants. OshKosh has it like that, you know. I think I've stumbled on the problem. You have balls, but no penis. You have a vagina and balls because you're a hermaphrodite, just like MeganHarris, so you two communicated secretly to try and make us all feel bad and call us super funny names. Wait. Neither one of you is that intelligent. Well, I guess it's just The Superficial's good fortune to have attracted TWO hermaphrodites that are fucking idiots.

Angie Dickinson GET YOUR HANDS OFF OF PAPAHOTNUTS! He's wearing the bow because he's going to give me his flower tonight. You know why there's no hair on his chest? Hair don't grow on steel, baby.

Little known fact - Janice Dicksinson was in the running to start opposite John Travolta in "Face-Off", but Nicholas Cage beat her in the crazy stakes.

#91, the evil twin was fed fish-heads, not slurry. you dumb fuck.

I wish I had gotten a cooler name, LandMan. You're inventive, why don't you come up with something like Jacqofuckhead.
You should know about the fish-heads, after all you had to eat them for how long?

You're probably all in a tizzy now because Mama said "pack it in." She doesn't mean drive against the flow of traffic on the Hershey Highway. She means we're gonna squash your one good testicle.

you're the dumbshit who got it wrong. stop trying to be funny, leave that to my big balls and penis.

plastic men cant grow hair !! thats silly !!

and WTF IS WITH BARE FEET ???

#42, you are my hero.

I bet she didn't "make" those models for us!

Land-Man - Your penis IS pretty funny, especially how you dress it up in that teeny tiny clown suit and make it curl up like it's scared. Hilarious.
Your balls, however, just smell funny.

mamacita...Let's be clear...I invented the MeganHarris bit. In addition, I invented the Who's on First bit, the Penis Through A Hole In the Popcorn At The Movie Theater bit, the Tucking Your Balls Between Your Legs to Look Like A Woman bit (that one kills at parties).

All you have ever come up with was AirCock and possibly a bad case of chlamydia.

@91 Jacq, it could be worse. MeganHarris could be Sherry_co's biological father. Imagine. And who would be the mother? That's right: Land-Clam, a.k.a Air-Cock.

101 - I actually came up with Aircock. But no Chlamydia. I do have a nice case of genital warts, that if you play connect the dots with, forms the visage of Ed Asner.

Janice Dickinson invented the wheel. True story.

I myself invented the dog-licking-the-peanutbutter-off-your-genitals bit, which also kills at parties.

@105
Do you display it right there, or just tell the story? Wait, let me get my lube...

What's the point of telling the story when you can be living it? That's like having a dog and not making ol' Scrappy earn his keep, if you know what I mean...

@101

I don't have a bad case of chlamydia. All the cool people know that using Windex cures everything, you imbecile. Just think, you could've been living herpes-free all this time if only you'd been cool enough to know the secret.

Remember when Balki made Janice Dickinson cry on the Surreal Life? No wait, I guess that's Teri Hatcher in all of those pictures.

I had a backyard barbecue in Hollywood about a year ago and halfway in, Janice Dickinson comes stumbling into the party with another, unnamed, brat-pack party companion and they were shnookered and shnozzled, man, what a mess. But the real coup de gras, the real touch of grace, was when I walked into the living room and walk up behind this buddy of mine, and I look down and Janice's hand is down his pants and he looks back up at me with this baffled, helpless expression. Like, what are you supposed to say when a world-famously leatherfaced tweaker shoves her claws down into yer manspace? Ewwwwwww...

She is a gross pig. I don't think it's right that she can judge the girls on top model looking the way she does. When was the last time she looked in the mirror...seriously?

Yes that's all interesting, but the article never explains why she's dressed like Joan Crawford. God, this woman scares the crap out of me!

Call me crazy but, I think Jane Dickinson is really old and that model is gay. I know, I know, it sounds crazy but it's just a hunch. I'm a part time detective.

She has to have her fun too I guess. Haha.

I'd hit 'em both...at the same time, baby!
Though I'm a female, and though she is scary, what a hell of a story for the grandkinds one day, no?

@91 - my balls are yours

Forget heroin chic; the newest trend is corpse chic. Just watch Janice and Teri work it.

Janice, can we get some male models who actually look like men? That includes having hair follicles on their bodies and not wearing black panties. Thanks.

Something is wrong with her sleeves, I think.

Between her and Kathy Griffin who do you think would win in a fight?

Kathy would because she doesn't care if she gets hit in the face.

#42 haha, perfect!

Am I the only one having trouble spotting the woman?

My God! Her mouth is huge, probably good for one thing...

OHH THIS IS SOOOOOO CUTE... she looks exactly like CRUELA DEVIL!!!

SASSY OUT!

Is it just me or is this he/she the ugliest thing you have ever seen?? "IT" gets uglier and more hideous everytime it makes an apperance.

ilike janice dickinson...

Pic. #3 looks like someone hired a tranny and two rent boys to crash their neighbor's Bar Mitzvah as a gag. Who's that poor kid and how why isn't his Mommy protecting him?

Oh mamacita, you ARE the bee's knees!!! I mean, you're just such a delicious slice of joy and happiness! I'm so glad, no, HONORED you BLESSED me with your quick wit and socially upstanding commentary. My world would be a bleek, dark, scary place were it not for your beams of warm, sweet wisdom! Thank you mamacita. A million times, thank you.

Yours truly,
Yo mama

@129

Any time!

Shes a little too JOAN COLLINS for my taste .... NO MORE WIRE HANGERS !!!

Star Maker, LOL!!! Make me choke on my lunch with the Corpse Chic and the Kathy Griffin comments. thanks.

Haha I aim to please, Spindoc.

But seriously, what ever happened to baby janice?

Oh dear...I'm from england, i don't know who she is, but she looks scary!

She's some bipolar hag who claims to be the world's first supermodel. Unfortunately for her, that dubious distinction belongs to Jean Shrimpton. "The Shrimp" was modelling for all of the major fashion mags while Dickinson was still in grade school. Jean was also the first to wear and popularize the mini-skirt.
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Jean_Shrimpton

In conclusion, Dickinson is a nobody whose only claim to fame is screwing Sylvester Stallone and Warren Beatty (who hasn't?).

why is she accesorizing her kimono with anal beads?

maybe they are little balls of cocaine like on those candy necklaces....

Not only is she just plain "whacked" but scary ass looking too!! She's melting just like the wicked witch in OZ.

I love love love janice. i'm so glad she is getting her own show. never a dull moment with her so i can't wait to watch.

I have never posted before but I just gotta tell ya.....

This woman has got to be thee Ugliest, over made up, under natural looking, highly botoxed and extremely hidious creature that I have seen in a long time! She dares to have a modeling agency?! Man--- I feel sorry for the gals that try to make a career move under her. Honey-- even Calgon couldn't and wouldn't take this chick away!

jerks... I read like 10 of these posts... get a life, she obviously has one...

NO MORE WIRE HANGERS!!!!