Is taht Jessica? Loks like Nicole Ritchie
(first?)

what a complete waste of oxygen....

oh, by the way, FIRST POST :) i'm not a virgin any more!

why is she famous? and how did she get her own clothing line anyway?

your still a virgin.......lol
What a complete waste of a post.....
Oh by the way, your second Virgin.....

lol, hilarious.

And do these glasses have their own zip code or what?

Anyway, I do have Jessica Simpson boots. They're cute. I don't know anything about her jeans but I think it's frickin' great that she won't even wear them.

When did she start dating Richard Chueng from "BLOW"......

Here's a better way to draw us in with your headlines: "Jessica Simpson refuses to wear pants, low-priced offers declined".
Or how about: "Jessica Simpson has Gigantic Hooters". That one's on me, Mr. Editor.

The last set of lips I saw like that had a hook in them.

She's even too dumb to wear a pair of jeans.

No, no, you've got it all wrong. She's just not promoting her jeans until she's built up the workforce to handle the production necessary to support the increase in sales that would happen if she *did* promote her jeans. That's why she's adopting a kid - gotta start that sweatshop somewhere.

PS, when did David Spade start hanging around with her?

We are dating. This is all a big lie. This website is fake and so is my computer. Fakers.

faaaaaaaaaaaaahhhhhhh q.

virgin post...she's such a narcissistic hypocritic Angelina wanna-be talentless waste of oxygen dwarf. she donates "anonymously" to an orphanage in Mexico and wants to adopt a baby! somebody sign her up for the Peace Corp. do they sell TRue Religion in Mexico?

Even she is getting sick of herself. And what's with the Jackie-O-esque look? She can't pull it off.

She's a loser!!

Wow her hair stylist is looking rather gaunt. Losing weight for the spotlight, no doubt. Who does he think he is, Chris McMillan?

Chestica is the opposite of Midas. Everything she touches turns to shit.

and btw, why the hell does that hideous looking hairdresser have to be seen with her all the time? If my hair looked like Shirley Temple's on the Good Ship Lollipop, I'd have to decapitate myself.

someone seriously needs to bitch-slap this wench and make her realize she's going down & is going to need every penny she has. The lifestyle won't last too long for this one & she's going to end up needing those shitty jeans to pile her fat ass into once gravity takes a hold of the tits & ass!

maybe she said she likes true religion jeans because they have the word relgion in them. we all know how religious she claims to be....

You're all just jealous of me. I'm used to it and so is Jess. Now excuse me, Ashley and I are going to go bang in her parents bed before Jessica gets back from her photoshoot.

I fart in your general direction.

I want to smash every pair of stupid over-sized fad sunglasses I see, and the faces that are holding them up.

This is terrible news.

Now she won't have enough money to give to Nick to keep himself in hair gel.

:(

lol #18. she probably thought she was so smart when she put 2 and 2 together. she is quite the prolific one

#20, i love my oversized sunglasses. they're the sex.

#23 - I can't help myself:"their the sex." Uh oh, this must be the new thing the 8th graders are saying this year. At least we know their paying attention in Grammar Class.
Yes, I find ripping on 8th graders to be an awesomely good time.

Unless she starts frontin' for Hefty Body Bags, enough with this shit already.

She's religous? When did she decide that? Before or after she signed on for the Baywatch movie?

I will pay her twice that amount to promote a new company called "Celebrity Muzzles".

I hate her nasty colligen lips, now they have that massive ridge of skin behind her overly filled lips, her plastic surgeon sucks!

What do you want to bet that Nick Lachey is a major stockholder in The Tarrant Apparel Group?

#24: What the hell are you talking about, bad grammar?

Her friend looks pretty creepy. I hope they both fall down some stairs.

#24 I don't get it, their the sex. #23 actually had it right with they're. And aren't you glad to get all the new fashionable catch phrases right from the source?

Oh and Jessica Simpson totally looks like Nicole Richie in that photo and we all know that is certainly what every young woman should aspire to.

mr. lachey is winning the post-breakup public opinion war for sure - with all those babes he's been spotted with.

I have to disagree, #32. Nick Lachey is a douchebag. Not that Jessica isn't, but..

She actually worked for her money.
Sort of.
This article proves it!
... Right?

I'm going to shut up, now...

The folks at Tarrant must not have attended business school. If so, they would have learned never to do business with a fool.

ok, quick grammar lesson #24. "they're" = they are. it's called a contraction. learn it. "their" = possesive pronoun. i commend you for trying to fix the 8th graders' grammar problems, but maybe, just maybe, next time you should know what the fuck you are talking about.

"at least we know their paying attention in Grammar Class" : oh boy. i'm embarrassed for you.

somebody won the 5th grade spelling bee & is damn proud of it. holy christ!

Good idea, Oshkosh.

By the way, "I'm going to shut up now.." doesn't need a comma.

You're a terrible person. :D

What's sad is that people will buy her clothing line only because her name is on it, regardless if she wears it or not. And she won't actually wear those clothes - c'mon, do we think the Olsen twins trot out every day in their Walmart brand? No. The only celebrity who seems to actually wear her clothing line is Gwen S with L.A.M.B. Maybe sometimes Kimora Lee with Baby Phat too, but for the most part, I don't believe that celebrities actually use the lines they promote, whether it be hair, makeup, clothing, soft drinks, etc. It's only to slap a recognizable name on a product in the hopes that it will bring in consumers. Jessica is no exception.

#33, you're right. Nick is a douchebag. But to claim that Jessica Simpson "worked" for her money is complete bullshit. It doesn't take much "work" to have your life taped and say stupid shit like "Is this chicken?" or "Do buffalo have wings?". Oy vey, this girl gets so much more credit than she deserves.

Oh, and Tom Cruise still loves the cock. Peace out.

um, yeah...and you people really think paris ate that hardee's monster burger in that add last year, didn't ya...

in all fairness...jessica only lent her name to the cheapy jean line in order to give the mexican orphans a job...it was that or adopt them all, which, turns out would've been a logistics nightmare...plus, opening an 'orphanage' is much more p.c. then owning a sweatshop...

#40, it was sarcasm.

:(

"When she was asked to name her favorite brand of jeans at an event last year she answered 'True Religion' rather than 'Princy.'"

She probably just forgot to answer "Princy" as she is a moron. When she signed the license, she thought somebody was giving her millions of dollars for being a celebrity... which doesn't make sense even to my dog.

This is REALLY bad press. I wonder how they are going to sugar coat this.

Why can't she just wear the stupid Jessica jeans? It's not like she's going to look TERRIBLE in them..

little girls everywhere are let down.

Good on her!

This is a CRISIS!

Nick Lachey is blowing up that cell phone with all sorts of questions..brother is smart enough to know that $100 Million is gonna make his marriage to Jessica practically worthless (except for her being a hot but dimwitted virgin and all).

Someone send Nick some valium pronto. Fight on playa. I feel ya pain.

Now I lay me down to sleep, I pray the lord my soul to keep, if I should die before I wake, I pray the lord........

That Nick gets half her money in the divorce, then after that she loses the lawsuit against the jeans company and has to resort to being on "The Surreal Life" just to pay the back due bills on her acne treatment.

Their biggest mistake was not signing Joe Simpson to promote the clothes. He can probably go on for days about how nice Jessica's ass looks. Joe probably also thinks that her clothes look better on the floor, if you know what I mean...

P.S. I love you oshkosh. You're fiesty! No, wait, YOUR feisty. That's more like it.

Hey, that guy right beside her is Kurt Cobain. He's not dead! He's just hanging out with no talent, brainless, shallow fuckwits.

Your all loosers and woudnt no grammer or puntuation if it bit you on the ass. Oh, and NewGuy sez fake to. WTF is he on????

Obviously oversized glasses are VERY cool. And it is nice to see Kato is back in circulation.

By the way, didn't know if you'd heard: Tom Cruise still loves the cock.

Wow. There must not be a lot to say about this thread because people are being asshats about grammar.

Grammar is FAKE!!! My fingers are fake. My IPOD is fake.

The matrix has you... and Jessica... in my closet... naked.

(my closet is fake)

The matrix might be fake. You are 100% fake. I think, therefore I am... fake.

That isn't Jessica Simpson.....its Tom Cruise all dolled up for a night out in West Hollywood with pals Alexis Arquette and Rupert Everette. Tom doesn't have a boyfriend because one man isn't enough to satisfy his craving for.......the cock.

Yeah the grammer police are going to string up #45 by the genitals for writing "Good on her" instead of "good for her".
Unless you are an American citizen who was properly taught language arts in elementary school you can no longer post on here. It's part of a very serious immigration reform act.

New Guy - get a life. You're boring! Move it...

"Yeah the grammer police are going to string up #45 by the genitals for writing "Good on her" instead of "good for her".
Unless you are an American citizen who was properly taught language arts in elementary school you can no longer post on here. It's part of a very serious immigration reform act."

MOST EXCITING COMMENT EVVVVVVER!!! THANKS BIATCHO!!! YOU RULE!!!

(I'm faking)

Oh my god New Guy! How did you know that I was, like, totally one of the kids in your biology class that gets really offended by,like, reverse psychology-comedic-insult tactics from complete strangers? You win my friend, touche!

LADIES AND GENTLEMAN, THE NEW, BEST COMMENT EVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVER!!!

(fake)

Wow, Jessica Simpson giving the wrong answer to a simple question! That surely is news.

Not only smart & biting... but a dry witted sense of humor to boot! I love it!!

(and I don't need to be a tool who has to point out the fact that I am being sarcastic all the time. Or should I say "facetious" since you probably just learned that when you took your SAT's).

I am gonna stay late at work tonight just so I can keep this up. My first day on here & I am arguing with some kid who still has posters of baseball players & Pamela Anderson on the same bedroom wall! I am not a fucking loser at all!!!

I heard NewGuy and Tom Cruise got caught in a hotel room with a bottle of KY Touch Massage.......

P.S They say it warms with touch....lol

Is that Martina Navratilova standing beside her?

The best part of the interview happened a few minutes later when the Tarrant Apparel group asked:

TAP: Jess, what's your favorite brand of alcohol?
JS: Mexico, I think. No, wait, it's chocolate.

TAP: Jess, what's your favorite sport?
JS: Lemons, or maybe a rainbow.

TAP: Ms. Simpson, how do you feel about the war in Iraq?
JS: Well, I prefer the taste of Windex, but Everybody Loves Raymond was my favorite song.

TAP: And finally, what's your prediction for the World Series this year?
JS: Oh, I just know that the Soprano's will win, or maybe a bird.

http://redwing.hutman.net/~mreed/warriorshtm/grammarian.htm

has she always had that cleft chin or did Papa Joe's pointy head connect as he was coming up?

I'm so disappointed in Tom Petty for hanging out with that no-talent Jessica Simpson, trying to revive his career.

Yes, YankeeRedNeck, she's always had that cleft. She's always been Ricky Martin. Am I the only one who sees that? She's totally Ricky Martin. With tits. Or is the other way around? I'm confused. Hold me!

eXtasyStef--that is a funny website--Bookmark worthy!

@64
That's pretty funny, but in OshKosh's defense, she almost always has something hilarious to say. Additionally, I'm funny (well, I think I am, even if no one else does) and I correct grammar sometimes. Bad grammar and misspellings are a pet peeve of mine.

Also, she did say "I'm going to shut up now" which indicates that she realized she was mistaken. So, for everybody being mean to OshKosh, geez, give it a rest. She's one of the most funny people on here usually. Plus, she's my homey cause she lives in Louisiana. Not that anyone else cares about that, but dammit, I do.

Nice to see Jan Michael Vincent in public again, huh?

My guess is she doesn't wear pants because "pants come in PAIRS and there's only ONE of me."

# 69 mamacita and # 64 Oshkosh- I'm Baton Rouge born and raised, so I know there are at least 2 other people in the state that can read.

Jess: Are those jeans or pants?
Tarrant: Well, they're both. They're pants which are jeans.

Jess: Huh?
Tarrant: You just have to wear them to go shopping and mention them whenever you can. This is called, promotion.

Jess: Promotion? Like, when I graduated from grade school and went to Junior High?
Tarrant: No, its like when you tried to sell your pseudo-Christian albums with your teenage breast implants.

Jess: But I never ended up selling any records.
Tarrant: Right... We meant to say its like when your Daddy sold your soul and body to get all rich and everything.

Jess: He said it was an artistic photoshoot!

@71

Actually, I was born and raised, and yes, still live in..........wait for it.........................Mississippi. Even more surprising, no? Anyhoo, proximity makes us brethren, even if I don't live in Louisiana. However, my mom is a nurse at Our Lady of the Lake in your neck of the woods. Ever been to The Melting Pot? That place is the shizzzzz!!!

#49, that was funny! However, I think he looks like an anorexic Kato Kaelin. What the hell happened to that dude? He looked like he enjoyed the Mary Jane.

I'm over her not loving her K-mart brand jeans, like that's a fuckin' surprise. I'm more irritated at her stupid glasses though, those things GOT TO GO!

#72 You get my vote for best comment on Superficial....HAHAHAHA!

That guy next to her....he's a wee bit scary looking, no?

My favorite is # 63 with # 72 a close second. Either way, both of them are funny as hell. Too many people ride the Papahotnuts train, but fuck it, he's hilarious.

Gogoboots - was it my wit or just the references to Jess' satanic-child-smut-pandering-incestuous-pedophilic dad?

HAHA.. why wud you sue someone for that amount for not wearing some scepecific clothing... i wudnt wear or promote princy jeans purily because of its feral name

She is looking more and more like Stepford Wives model #3 everyday. I'm starting to think that Nick got the best of this deal.

Totter I think it was the artistic photoshoot part at the end that made my nite, thanks!

In fact fuck it...I just love thinking about the brainless shit that comes out of her mouth, ever awaiting the word of Jessica!

She's like a real life blow up doll...well actually a blow up doll is probably still smarter, but Id still rather fuck Jessica.

#26 - Quiet, you! It's all good, because she says "OH MY GAAAHHHHH!!!" Because I'm sure God will be fooled by a technicality like that.

"Oh Jessica, you clever girl -- got me again!"

I wonder if she will write about this traumatic experience on her online "journal".

oh my goodness, #1--you totally took the words RIGHT out of my mouth!!!! #40, i totally agree with you "oy vey" is RIGHT!!! i cant believe she wouldnt even wear HER clothes that SHE designed....well actually thats no surprise, shes is such a label whore!!!! oh yes, and #19, that was funny!!!! actually EVERYONE'S comments about jessicas suit are making me laugh so hard! and, not to sound like a broken record, but #72--- good one!!! and #48, you DEF hit the nail on the head!!!!
keep them comming!!!!! have a good one guys and babes in here :)
LUV
ME

PS, #86, that was funny!!!! her "journal"!!
hey, i heard she was PLANNING TO ADOPT too!!!
ugh....she was an awful wife, i cant imagine what kind of mother she'll be :

Kid: mommy?
Jess: dont call me that! its jes-sick-cuh!
Kid: ok, can u make me some mac and cheese?
Jess: whats that?
Kid: um...its pasta with cheese powder you cook it.
Jess: you WHAT it?
Kid: um, you MAKE it, you cook it, you put the water in a pot on the stove until it boils, put in the pasta and then wait until it softens...wait, mommy, i mean jes-sick-cuh ( as she gave him the look of death! ), why are you looking at me like im speaking french?
Jess: look, i dont know what any of those things are, so why dont you make it yourself, i need to get my lips injected with more resylin ( sorry i dont know the spelling or the name of that new lip stuff )and i need a new $50K hermes handbag because you touched my other ones with your little gross kiddie hands!!!so go ahead and make it yourself.
Kid: but, im only 5. isnt that dangerous?
Jess: who cares?
Kid: can CaCee help me?
Jess (screams): NO!!!! cacee is MY assistant!! she is with me along with the rest of my silly entaurage!( sorry i really cant spell!!)
Kid: (sighs) ok...
and then......
WE INETURPT THIS SHOW FOR A BREAKING NEWS STORY!!!!
JESSICA SIMPSON'S ADOPDED SON/DAUGHTER RUSHED TO THE ER WITH SEVERE BURNS ON HIS/HER BODY! APPARANTLY, SIMPSON LEFT THE CHILD ALONE IN HER BEV HILL MANSE ALONE AND UNSUPERVISED; THE CHILD'S BURNS ARE A RESULT OF SIMPSON'S INABILITY TO .......WELL, TO DO ANYTHING!!!
sorry, i know that was long and not as funny as #63 and popahotnut's stuff( and many others! :) ) but i had to do a rant on the adoption!! luv you guys and babes!
ME

# 54:
"Good on her" is perfectly correct Australian English. So Shush, person from a former colony where people truly believe that 'entree' ('entry, starter') means 'main course' and that their chosen form of government is called 'democracy'.
WAHAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHH.
LMFHO

@87 and 88

OK, I'm reallllly not trying to be mean, but here's a little well intended advice.

1) Please refrain from using further instances of the phrase "guys and babes"

2) If you admittedly "really cant spell", please try http://dictionary.reference.com/

Please and thank you.

i love Jessica but she just got her way out of getting free jeans!!

ugh!

Is it just me.....or does she look exactly like Nicole Ritchie (if she'd just lose those last stubborn 65 lbs)

#85: I love you.

:(

Mama - so right. 87/87 - sign up for the word-of-the-day on dictionary.com

Also, look up backward, feeble minded and incest; real pretty pictures of Jess right there.

Nice glasses, idiot. Too much GtF ratio; glasses to face ratio. Not sure how tinting protects YOUR LIPS from UV rays, but WEAR SOME REGULAR GLASSES, christ.

Mamcita, im always complimenting you on things you say on this blog site. many cant spell,llike, on this post as well, and im just admitting it. so fuckin sorry i offended you with the "i cant spell" phrase.
as for the guys and babes, what do YOU want me to say? guys and dolls??? sorry, its just the way i talk. (shrug) why do you care anyway? i never say anything mean about you...yeah yeah i saw the "not trying to be mean" but..still....this is just me is that ok? i mean, this IS a blog site....;)
LOVE for ItallianStallion and PapaHotNuts!!