January 03, 2006

Star Jones hits the beach

Looking at Star Jones in a swimming suit has given me an out of control boner.


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» Jude Law can't visit Sienna Miller
» Kate Moss is a pedophile
» Paris and Nicky Hilton enjoy the new year
» Angelina Jolie is pregnant with Brad Pitt's child
» Mischa Barton is a bad girlfriend

Comments

Is it me, or is her head 200% bigger now?

If I wasn't queer before I saw this picture, seeing her in a bathing suit surely would've pushed me over the edge. Ugh. I may never get another erection. Thanks, Star.

The second photo looks like the still shots taken from that Bigfoot sighting video.

Anyone else suddenly hungry for chocolate pudding?

I can't find Star in this picture...all I see is dude, dude, walrus, dude, dude, manatee, dude...

No less than an indestructible boner.

I can top that! I can top that! Click on name for URL link! :-)

I am shocked that nobody mentioned the first photo yet. Maybe it's just me...

Doesn't it look like Al is being mounted by the Starbeast?

"The second photo looks like the still shots taken from that Bigfoot sighting video."

Hahah! ...It's funny because it's true.

"The second photo looks like the still shots taken from that Bigfoot sighting video."

So friggin' true.

I hate that bitch!!

The Star Jones ballon has escaped!

Run for your lives!

No, No, this mistake happens all the time. That's a picture of Jobu Moghandishu, leader of the Urdu tribe. He's often mistaken for Star Jones.

BLACK PEOPLE AT THE BEACH? THEY CAN SWIM NOW???

wow, that is so not funny

If Kevin Federline is allowed to rap, black people are allowed to swim.

She looks like Beetlejuice or is it .... Blacksqwach?

I don't know what's more painful on my eyes...the pictures, or some of the half-assed attempts at humor above. Hmmmm....

so in the first one, she's giving it to al like he's used to?

I think my penis inverted and is stabbing me in my spleen. Ow! My spleen!

"If Kevin Federline is allowed to rap, black people are allowed to swim."

Scratch that, if PATRICK SWAYZE and PARIS HILTON are allowed to rap, than black people are allowed to swim.

I'm sure Al would rather have one of the other "manly men" on the beach slathering on the sunscreen - instead of that massive tranny he married.

i realize that her face isn't the focus of these pictures, but it's amazing how losing weight can actually have a negative aesthetic effect on some people. it's especially amazing when the people are still fat.

Every time I see them together, especially in pics like this where she has got all of her lovliness out for the world to see, I keep thinking, "big gay Al is not f#$@ing her!!!!" This is Terry McMillan all over again.

I would like to point out Star is a winner in the 'winners and losers of weight loss/gain' for 2005 in the newest National Enquirer, or Star, or one of those other rags I always buy. Which means that she is a winner for having a gorgeous new figure. Apparently, the writers at National Enquirer/Star/whatever magazine I was reading have not seen Star Jones in the past ten years. Or so.

In the first pic, she appears to be taking a snap from the center, but the football is actually Al's head. And in a strange variation from footabll, she eats Al's entire body. Then in pic 2, we see her returning to the huddle of 10 terrified teamates.

That bigfoot comment is hilarious. I can't stop laughing.

In the first picture she definitely looks like she's mounting Al. I guess she's the pitcher and he's the catcher.

looks like evolution skipped her. she looks like a caveman in the second picture.

wow i think i am now offically blind. star jones hasa horrible shape u think brit is a poatao then check this out. brit has an excuse this thing dosent i mean why does she look that way it is really scary she looks like someone did a horrible photoshop and it ghas come alive to terrorize us with bad jokes and horrid outfits. i wont even metion the ass radier she calls her man though i will say if you read tha al reynolds is in the hospital with massive back injuries due to the fact that what appered to be an oddly shaped elephant sat on him at the bech dont be surprised.

This is a really cool pic. I've never seen a horse ride a man before, nevertheless walking on just 2 legs. Kudos to Superficial... WOW WE...Where do you find this stuff?

Oh come on, that first pic is just TOO EASY!

With her sitting on him like that, won't the circulation to his legs be completely cut off? Isn't he aware of the danger?

as a side note- who is the manly stud muffin behind her in the blue and white trunks rockin out the back hair? rrowrr!

I didn't know Glad garbage bags came in red!!!

fuck im hungry

I'm having a really, really hard time making my decision but which pic is more disgusting: this one or the one of skinny Nicole? I don't know but if it were possible to transfer weight between two people they could make a happy medium each.

...I can't believe I'm saying this, but she actually looked better when she was heavier. Forget the body--that's never gonna happen. At least when she was fatter she would have never thought to wear a bathing suit. But her head! Her face! Its effing freaky! I shudder to think if she keeps losing weight what she will look like as a "normal" sized person...At least before she did have a pretty face/hair in a kind of tranny way...

I agree with amma. She looked better fat. Now she just looks weird, weird, weird.

I dont know why, but I have this sudden urge to book an African Safari

She looks more like the snapshot of evolution chart http://www.canmag.com/images/front/moviesetc/evolutionchart.jpg (2nd one from left).

Wheres the beach? Because it looks like she's giving that dude in the first pic the old "federal pen, pound you in the ass" handshake. Not to mention the fact that 4 burly fireman are standing off camera, waiting to ride her to a burning house.

Look at the size of her man-package! lol

See! This is the problem with that damn bypass surgery. She drops three, four hundred pounds and thinks its alright to subject people to her sagging thigh ripples. And thank you for reminding me of what my grandmother looked like in a bathing suit- it took years of therapy to erase that from my memory. Stupid sasquatch!

*Props to Shawn! -too GD funny!

Notice how every man in these pictures is looking away from her, including Al.

I didn't even recognize her on the View after not having seen it for awhile. I thought she had been replaced. That's Whoopie Goldberg in the second pic.

You know your body sux when your FUPA comes out further than your gorilla boobs.

FUPA = Fat Upper P* Area
so this term can apply to both males and females. I don't know WTF Star Jones is.

Maybe they're not so much as gorilla boobs than beagle ears... or flapjacks.

i feel sorry for that poor horse whos hair she ripped off...whats up with that...

Star Jones is ignorant. She hates atheists. She wears animals. I'm glad she lost her red carpet gig. My blogsite has a comparison of her to Bigfoot. No wonder she hate the idea of evolution.

I used to think the biggest idiot who ever married was Britney Spears when she married KFed, but after seeing these pictures, I have to think the new all time idiot is Star's husband Al. I dont care how much money Star has, you couldnt pay me enough to marry her and have to look at her naked, on the beach, and have to also bang her on occasion. And no one loves money more then me.

At least she's slimmer than she once was...

Looks like bigfoot on the beach to me.

Well If anyone feels bad about the black people can't swim thing..don't worry they usually have floating devices..particularly around the rear. Or if you are a white person and u cant swim like the fat guy behind star in the picture on the right well he has no floating device around the rear as you can see so he will probrally sink. But he probrally has a pot belly to make up for that. Why is it that fat people like to make fun of other fat people..i guess because it's fun! I bet most of the people in this room have a little pudge..well that's a whole nother message board.

She does look like bigfoot!

She also looks frightening. I caught sight of her on The View yesterday morning and holy hell she's creepy. Big bulgy eyes, bulgy forehead, and that neck! Ugh.

You've got to admit she must have the best PR firm in the whole entire galaxy. Anyone who can take a fugly, obnoxious, no-talent, self-absorbed bag of lumpy turds and have her wedding become a media "event" has earned his/her keep. Now she's published a BOOK? "Shine"? It's about her, so she has the first three letters of the title right, but really ...

well black people today do teach their kids to swim and that's the only contradiction I will make here.

However, I no longer even like Star Jones - she was on Prime Time last week and wouldn't share if she had the big gastric bypass surgery or the smaller, less risky adjustable gastric band (Lap-Band) but she did not hesitate to discuss her husband's sexual orientation!!!?!?!?!?!?????

Geesh, I do believe her priorities are totally fubar'd. And it's always about her!
I cannot stand a lot of men because it's always about them....but Star Jones is exactly the same, just the *other* gender.

And then, The View....I used to love that show but now all those women talk at the same time and nobody can make heads or tails out of what they are saying during Hot Topics. They even make fun of the ladies of the The View on MADTV and SNL and other comedy shows about this very thing, the 5 heads all chatting at one time.

Did you know that 50% of all gastric surgery patients, once they lose the weight, their marriages break up? If you don't believe me - go google for it. I happen to work for GBS doctors.

Star and Al will be history before we all know it and then she'll probably re-gain it all back.....like Carney Wilson (yeah, I know she had a baby in April 2005 but she now weighs close to 200, actually 188 as of a couple of weeks ago).

*lol* -

OH....MY.....GAWD....Once again, stomach surgery ain't worth sheeeit if you are completely unwilling to lift one foot in exercise. Now she looks like a sloppy, droopy, OLD hag-bag. All that fame and money and she STILL won't get a gym membership. Star Jones is full of CRAP. She used to be all "I'm big AND beautiful" (moves head from side to side). Where did that go huh?

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