December 26, 2005
Lucy Liu seduced by George Clooney
If George Clooney really wants babies, it looks like he might be trying to secure the womb of former flame Lucy Liu. The two made like horny high schoolers at the prom, hopped into a limo and proceeded to do things I haven't done since the Clinton administration. Apparently, Lucy hasn't gotten any in a while either.
The "Syriana" star and Liu left Downtown Cipriani the other night and began lip-locking in his waiting limo. "She looked like she was going to devour him," a witness said of the 37-year-old starlet.
If I were to be devoured by a celebrity, I would like it to be Lucy Liu. But only after she washes Clooney's sperm out of her mouth. Then I hope she gets sick and vomits pieces of me all over George during the next make out fest. That would surely turn him back to being gay, and bring an end to this madness.
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Comments
1. Posted by Captain Awesome on December 26, 2005 11:54 PM
I was told her cooch smelled and tasted like Orange Chicken.
2. Posted by Binky on December 26, 2005 11:59 PM
Well, I know it's hard to top your career after you've appeared in a Drew Barrymore produced film, but I think there's a chance Lucy may be after more in life. Apparently she "plied George with oysters and champagne" Hummmm... the last time I was plied with oysters and champagne - I had to adjust my medication... So Cheers and Happy New Year to the newly invented couple !!
3. Posted by Binky on December 27, 2005 12:01 AM
Eva, Drew, Lucy - they all taste like chicken hun.
4. Posted by Captain Awesome on December 27, 2005 12:09 AM
oh :)
5. Posted by Binky on December 27, 2005 12:27 AM
Np - Ask for the 'extra spicy'. (Stay away from 'the Hawaiian' or anything mixed with 'cooked fruit')
6. Posted by your mom is GAY on December 27, 2005 01:39 AM
lucy is hot and smells like flowers.
captain awesome's dick smells like crackers and clam chowder.
7. Posted by Captain Awesome on December 27, 2005 04:25 AM
Sorry hun, I'll wash it for you next time. You can't say no to a Mermaid.
8. Posted by Sheva on December 27, 2005 09:59 AM
Lucy Liu? Yuch, bleech, egads! Clooney must be really hurting for women these days. Something very yuch about her.
9. Posted by BEAM on December 27, 2005 10:45 AM
Lucy Liu is way too good for George Clooney.
10. Posted by HollyJ on December 27, 2005 01:17 PM
I bet Lucy's manhole has teeth in it.
11. Posted by andrewthezeppo on December 27, 2005 05:35 PM
Wait so Ling Woo is dating Dr. Ross, they can pretend to be big movie stars all they want, but we know they're still TV scum.
12. Posted by hafaball on December 27, 2005 06:24 PM
Opposites attract I guess, since George Clooney has one of the best senses of humor in the bizz and I don't think Liu has ever laughed except if her botox tells her to. But hey, she's hot sort of, he's handsome...I just hope she doesn't beat him too much in bed.
13. Posted by derekd on December 27, 2005 08:54 PM
LMAO!! I love it! All the comments had me rollin!! ESPECIALLY Captain Awesome's. I don't care what anyone says though Lucy is hot! I'd bang her till that lazy eye was str8. Orange Chicken Cooch and all.
14. Posted by fatgirl on December 28, 2005 09:15 AM
I don't think Lucy Liu can see him, much less say George Crooney.
15. Posted by Tania on December 29, 2005 02:06 AM
OMG - fatgirl that was hilarious!
16. Posted by bobfet1 on December 29, 2005 10:08 PM
wow what's with all the racist comments?
17. Posted by thatoneguy2 on January 8, 2006 03:09 AM
captain awesome's dick smells like crackers and clam chowder
i have honestly never read anything that funny in my life. i cant stop fuckin laughing after that. who the hell thinks of that?
18. Posted by thatoneguy2 on January 8, 2006 03:11 AM
and last time i ate at the lucy liu wok, it definitely tasted like kung pao beef with a side of fried rice and egg roll