December 13, 2005
Robbie Williams is too rich to be happy
Britain's best-known closet homosexual Robbie Williams believes he'd have a better chance of finding love if he was destitute.
He says, "Money's nothing to do with happiness. Sometimes I feel like cashing everything in and giving it all away. Sometimes I think my life would be easier if I didn't even have £100. Then I could walk the streets as a free man, meet a girl and live a quiet life."
As often as I've heard celebrities moan about how difficult it is to be rich, I've never seen any of them actually give their money away. Somehow they find the inner strength to go on living in mansions, driving luxury cars, being treated like royalty and banging the help. If Robbie Williams has a hard time finding girls while rich and famous, I can only assume he has some sort of cancer-causing penis. And I don't care how poor you are, that's never gonna work.
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Comments
1. Posted by MrPloppy on December 13, 2005 11:31 AM
Robbie being broke and obscure doesn’t mean you will get a girl and be happy. Trust me on that.
Al Bundy “Son what’s more Important love or money”
Bud “Money, I can always rent love”
2. Posted by archyros on December 13, 2005 11:40 AM
Robbie, maybe the girls just don't want a penis that tastes like a man's ass. On the other hand, money can catch all the skanky ass you want.
3. Posted by drowningfool on December 13, 2005 11:57 AM
Let me just say this to my dear friend Robbie: I have less than $ 100 to my name, and the chances of me just "meeting" a girl and getting married are about the same as me being hit by a train while taking a dump outside her Majesty's lawn.
4. Posted by Kg on December 13, 2005 12:13 PM
Awwwh, I wish I was too rich to be happy.
Well, atleast I'm a "free man"
5. Posted by Belle on December 13, 2005 12:19 PM
It's true- girls are just *appalled* by rich celebrities. I feel so sorry for him..
6. Posted by prufock on December 13, 2005 12:25 PM
I feel his pain. He's right, when you're rich, it's so hard to find love.
Because I'm such a nice guy, I feel it is my duty to help him out. That's right, I will take on the burden of being a millionaire so that Robbie William's can find happiness. So, Robbie, whenever you're ready, just forward all your money to my bank account. It will be difficult being rich, but if I'm helping out a fellow human being, I think I can handle it.
7. Posted by spacca on December 13, 2005 12:32 PM
He isnt gay, just too ugly to have anyone. He should just rejoin TAKETHAT boy band, oh wait no isnt that because he tried to kiss Gary Barlow? ...
8. Posted by Terry on December 13, 2005 12:38 PM
GWEN STEFANI IS PREGGIES!!!!
http://fadedyouth.blogspot.com/2005/12/proof-that-gwen-is-stefani-pregnant.html
it is soooo obvious
9. Posted by nikki on December 13, 2005 01:08 PM
Hi Robbie:
Please give me all your money so that your dream can come true. Please. I insist.
10. Posted by Smackage on December 13, 2005 01:13 PM
i'd marry him, even with a cancer causing penis, but only if i could put a clause in the prenup where he's not allowed to have sex with me. it seems like that might be ok, since he's gay and everything
11. Posted by Synthwhore on December 13, 2005 01:38 PM
I'll have sex with him either way. And I don't normally put out.
12. Posted by sammygirl on December 13, 2005 04:34 PM
Um, who's Robbie Williams, besides "Britain's best-known closet homosexual?" By the way, I thought that title went to Jude Law.
13. Posted by al rarow on December 13, 2005 06:26 PM
I didn't know he was closeted. I thought he was always all about the peen.
14. Posted by Binky on December 13, 2005 07:44 PM
I agree with the last guy. He's in the closet !!??? What about the " Mission Plausable " vid with the Tomster ? ...Or was that Kidman... ?
15. Posted by hafaball on December 14, 2005 12:37 AM
And saying to a girl, "Hey, I'm robbie williams, I gave up all my money." Usually it'd be followed by laughter, then, "Wait...who's robbie williams?"
16. Posted by Captain Awesome on December 14, 2005 12:47 AM
Cash it all in, you fucking blowhard. Woe is me, its hard being rich.
17. Posted by Nola on December 14, 2005 09:55 AM
Boy, he really hit the nail on the head this time. There's nothing like being dead broke, chasing your ex for child support, dodging phone calls from creditors, collecting change out of the couch cushions for gas money...
Um, that's what I've heard, anyway.