October 19, 2005
Heidi Klum has an ugly baby
In Touch Weekly has photos of Heidi Klum's new baby, and boy if it isn't the ugliest looking baby I've ever seen. Last time I checked, human babies are usually supposed to look like humans, and not weird rodent creatures you might find in the sewer. At this rate it looks like he's going to grow up to be the next Mole Man, and in twenty years he'll probably make some lame attempt to take over New York City and kill all the "surface dwellers" only to be foiled at the last minute by some meddlesome kids. And I know it's cruel to make fun of a baby that can't even hold its own head up, but he should have thought of that before he was born an ugly mole creature.
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Comments
1. Posted by Zanathon on November 17, 2005 11:50 PM
That picture ought to be on the cover of the Enquirer with the headline:
"Beautiful Super Model Gives Birth to Ugly Troll Baby"
2. Posted by sjb16 on December 2, 2005 10:25 AM
I know she's proud of giving birth to her "baby", but she definitely shouldn't of been on the cover with a baby that looked like that thing.
3. Posted by beachgirl53 on January 13, 2006 03:54 AM
The worst part is she's so hot that the "baby" (prune) looks even uglier by comparison. Way to boost your kid's self esteem from an early age, Heidi.
4. Posted by rivercmb on January 24, 2006 04:16 PM
I bet she's feeding that kid with a shovel in his basement cell
5. Posted by ESQ on January 24, 2006 04:43 PM
WOW! Obviously, the baby did not get her looks.
6. Posted by DannyJames on January 24, 2006 05:35 PM
that thing looks like it was shit out.
7. Posted by Jayne on January 24, 2006 05:46 PM
This proves not every child is a miracle.
I hope it gets better to look at when it gains some baby fat.
8. Posted by jimmy cliff williams on January 24, 2006 07:51 PM
Anyone agree that this thing looks like a miniature version of Usher?
9. Posted by beachedwhale on January 24, 2006 11:21 PM
Superficial, this is the funniest story you have posted in the six months that I have been reading. I am STILL laughing about it!
10. Posted by PhDiva on January 25, 2006 12:59 AM
You people obviously haven't been around infants. In their very first weeks, many babies look very tiny and ancient. Most American celebrities won't let cameras shoot their babies at this age because they are so obsessed with appearances. I also think the comments are a bit racist because this is a black/biracial child. Black children are usually very beautiful, but they take several weeks to get darker and plumper. Many black babies look white and wrinkled when they are first born, and then become very attractive. In any case, this is an infant. Stop being so nasty and give the baby a break.
11. Posted by angeleyedsinner21 on January 25, 2006 10:32 AM
You people are extremely shallow to be putting down an innocent little baby! Is it really necessary to pick on defenseless people? I bet you all enjoy picking on little old ladies and mentally challenged people too huh? That's just sad. Didn't your mother ever tell you that calling babies ugly will result in your own child being born ugly as hell! lol good luck to you all because karma is a b!tch!
12. Posted by Dee on January 25, 2006 11:50 AM
All babies are scrunched up and funny looking when they are that young. The baby will be adorable when it grows into itself!!
13. Posted by stephanie on January 25, 2006 12:22 PM
I'd say 99% of all babies are ugly when they are born. This baby though is amazingly ugly though. It's almost amazing she loves him. He does look like a little usher! LOL! Thankfully I already had my kids and they are cute as hell so I can talk all the shit I want on the little troll baby!
14. Posted by duster200 on January 25, 2006 04:24 PM
Besides being extremely witty and not remotely racist, I'm sure the people who made comments 1-9 must all be gorgeous creatures.
After all, only intelligent, successful and beautiful people would actively gain pleasure from laughing at a baby they thought was ugly, right?
15. Posted by robot_turkey on January 25, 2006 05:25 PM
You racist, ugly cunts make me want to vomit all over you. (That includes the author of the article.) There is NOTHING wrong with how the baby looks. He had JUST BEEN BORN!! EVERY LAST BABY IN THE WORLD LOOKS JUST LIKE THAT MINUTES AFTER IT'S BORN. ALL BABIES, EVEN YOU PEOPLE. When your mothers oozed you out of their collective twats all of you hateful people more than likely looked like inverted maggots. I bet you're also hypocrites who tell others not to pick on children of celebrities because they're "innocent" and can't help who their parents are. Yet you pick on babies who are the most innocent human beings in the world. This is beyond disgusting.
16. Posted by erudite_travelgirl on January 26, 2006 06:15 PM
Are you ignorant or just jealous? I stumbled on this site trying to locate a picture of Heidi's baby, and I am saddened to read the article and comments. My only reproof is this: All children are sons and daughters of our Heavenly Father, and should be treated and respected accordingly.
17. Posted by EvilCutie25 on January 27, 2006 05:33 PM
I've had 2 children myself and when they are first born they look like that- After a couple of weeks they start looking like a baby, get their cute plumpness and everything- But everybody looks kinda weird when they're first born, her baby will be cute once it's out of the infant stage:) Course, I think all babies are precious:)
18. Posted by WymerMom on March 26, 2006 02:02 AM
Well you how they say "a face only a mother could love". Well I think it works here. I too have bi-racial (hispanic/caucasion) children my oldest and youngest were sooo ugly I asked to send them back LOL. The nurses asked if my husband (whitey) was the father. I find it comforting to know such a pretty girl had a baby that looked like mine, I was starting to think I was the only one with a ugly baby :-)
Kuddos for Heidi showing off her ugly baby